Friends didn't "tip"....bit tight?

[tvsavec]

Me and three friends went to a little family run Greek restaurant.
The bill came to around £80 for four of us.
At the end of the meal
Friend 1 put £2 on the table and I also put £2
Friend 3 said "is that for a tip"
We said yeah.....she shouts for the waiter and hands him the £4 and says thanks
They didn't bother to put a couple of pound in each

Aibu to think it's a bit tight?

Now THAT is stingy.

Years ago I went out for lunch with work for someone leaving. 10 of us all had the happy hour menu and a soft drink so we all owed £9. This was when paying by card wasn’t common so we all stuck in a tenner. At least, 9 of us did. One woman, known for being a bit of a penny pincher (the type of you say you’re going out for a sandwich she gives you 50p and says “get me a prawn baguette” and you never see the extra money back) said “I’ll pay the whole thing on my card and keep the cash”. I noticed she didn’t add a tip - so effectively she got a free meal! She was v popular, and so when I pointed this out the other women told mw to ‘stop picking on her’ 🙄

No. You entirely missed my point there.

My point is if your ’excellent’ service can ONLY be ‘bought’ then you can’t complain if good tippers are absolute bastards to you. You value tips over anything else and you can’t have it both ways.

I've had this with group meals. Most of us got wise and kept our tips back until the bill had been paid. The CF ery of people thinking my tip should subsidise their meal.

I live in the US now Panda and Ugly Bonnet who insist on denying anything I am saying as being truthful- what is that all about guys? Deny anything people say if it contradicts your point of view?

I was raised in the UK and yes I waitressed from the age of 13 actually and yes I funded my degree- having lived overseas a few years, I found I was screwed over in the UK despite being British when I applied for a loan as you are classified as a non-resident so no loans for me. It was horrible. I suddenly had to hold down a job and a full-time job with zero financial support from my parents since they had not been to university there were no handouts there( unlike 80% of the wealthy kids at the university I attended who had never done even a Saturday job in their privileged lives) ...it was extrememely hard but yes I did it.

I did extremely well on my degree too. Never got to go to parties or to socialise of course because when I wasn't studying, I was in a restaurant serving customers, 90% of whom tipped 8-12% typically meaning I worked 3, 8 hour shifts rather than 5-6 hour shifts which would have made it impossible for me to study for my degree. Tips make waitressing jobs one way people can study for a degree whilst working part-time. I cleared between 70 and 125 a shift back then and that money paid rent, food and tuition. In summers I worked 14 shifts by picking up shifts in every single branch of the chain I worked in when they needed coverage- I look back and yeah it was heroic thinking about it that I paid my way with no debt at all and no handouts from the bank of mum and dad and that was because my job with tips was earning me on average between 8 and 14 pounds an hour which is what I needed to make and that is why I chose the job back then in the situation I found myself in. I had my own station to work of 6 tables and I kept every penny of every tip apart from in branches where the bar made the drinks- then we gave them 10% at the end of the shift. The chefs maybe made 9-10 an hour and their work was typically less stressful than dealing with customers- the waiters earned every penny of their wage and tips.

I repeat thanks so much to the non-tight-arsed Londoners of 1999 to 2002 who came in that restaurant and tipped (as was custom then and is custom today) and enabled me to get by on 24 hours a week in a job and so get a university education so I could progress in life.When people did not tip, I let it roll over me because such is life, 10% of people are unable to be generous in those situations ia a universal truth in the UK, I discovered but I saw the response of my peers and know non-tippers that they have a strong response to non-tippers, they think you are cheap to spend that money on feeding your face but not leave a few quid tip and it does not have to be ten % but it needs to be something. If you can afford to eat out you can leave a tip. All this talk of logic about who we tip is a distraction. It gets you off tipping.

We all know if we sit down to have a meal in a restaurant and someone comes over and gets stuff for us, runs back and forth meeting our requests........ we are expected to tip and Macdonalds is not like that. 7%,8% 10% 12% 20%, you choose but for goodness sake do not be in that a tight- arsed little minority fight club of non-tippers called...The Ugly *

I have a wonderful life (enabled by having a degree) that happens to be in the US today. By the way, revealing yourself as a blanket 'everyone hates all Americans and the whole of America and all Americans only care about money ' tells me all I need to know about you Ugly Bonnet...talk about small-minded, tired cliched generalizations on a country as large as Europe and with a population significantly larger than that of England, but go ahead carry on with your little generalizations if they serve you to keep on keeping doing you...

What a shitty attitude - “I’ll only do a good job if you give me extra money”

agreed. Someone with this attitude is not a good wait staff member.

i am not your typical “groomed” middle aged woman. I don’t wear make up, do my nails, hair clothes are for comfort. Dh isn’t much better.

we probably don’t present like a well off couple who will tip well. Like I said I do tip, because i’ve been there. But anyone giving “basic order taking and plate carrying” because they’ve judged tipping ability on my appearance isn’t getting a tip anyway.

so be careful who you judge to be non-tippers…

I was talking specifically about the scenario where a non tipper is a repeat customer and you already know they're going to tip.

No, your repeat custom is not as valuable to the waiting staff as an actual tip, and at the end of the day, if the restaurant is full and your table could have been filled by someone who does tip, your presence means the waiting staff are going home with a bit less money in their pocket than they would have been if someone else had taken that table.

I agree with that. Non tippers are always going to be more of an annoyance even if they're gracing them with their regular custom.

No, your repeat custom is not as valuable to the waiting staff as an actual tip, and at the end of the day, if the restaurant is full and your table could have been filled by someone who does tip, your presence means the waiting staff are going home with a bit less money in their pocket than they would have been if someone else had taken that table

but it is as valuable to the restaurants bottom line. If no one fills that table, perhaps because the wait staff can be arsey and only give very basic service to some people, then the restaurant loses covers and don’t make money.

this happens too often, restaurant doesn’t make money, you lose your job, and who tips is the least of your worries. You will be going home with a lot less money in your pocket.

i can’t believe someone would treat paying customers like they’re wasting your time.

I agree with that. Non tippers are always going to be more of an annoyance even if they're gracing them with their regular custom

if you are treating customers like an annoyance you’re in the wrong job. And you expect tips as well 😂😂

Especially because if they're coming back regularly, there are clearly no issues with the service and they are having a nice time.

For what it's worth, although I wasn't talking about pre-judging people based on whether you think they'll tip or not, there are certain things which are a pretty reliable indicator. But they have absolutely nothing to do with your clothes or your nails. It's all about their behaviour. Generally, if someone treats the waiting staff like something on the bottom of their shoe, it would be surprising if they turned out to be a generous tipper.

Customers who make a huge mess too - it goes one way or the other. If I had customers whose children made a mess with food or crayons or whatever, if they were hugely apologetic it was pretty likely they would leave a huge tip to compensate, and if they said nothing at all it was pretty likely they would leave a smaller than average tip, despite creating a lot more work than the average customer!

I don't understand people who leave such a mess in restaurants either. If my toddler starts hurling food and crayons everywhere I'll tidy up as best as I can

The knots you are tying yourself in to justify not tipping are really quite extraordinary.

Whether a table of non tippers comes in or not is going to make zero difference to whether the restaurant is a commercial success or is forced to close.

From the point of view of the waiting staff, whose take home pay is based on their hourly wage plus their tips, if someone who is known not to tip comes in and takes a table, they're creating more work for what - to the waiting staff - will be the same amount of money. Obviously you'll be polite enough and take their order and clear their plates, but they just aren't worth giving gold star service to. The waiting staff would be better off focusing their energy on making sure the other customers have a really good time.

And that can easily affect the restaurant's bottom line too. When I was a waitress, the tables I had a great rapport with were not just more likely to leave a generous tip, they were also far more likely to order an extra bottle of wine or upgrade to a more expensive one, and order dessert, coffee or liqueurs. I can't tell you the number of times I had a spark with a certain table and I cheekily suggested another bottle of wine, or something they otherwise wouldn't have ordered, and they said, "oh, go on then".

Those customers are just more worth everybody's time.

Something tells me that restaurant staff aren't likely to assume you'll be a lousy tipper or have any reason not to give you good service then!

I live in the US now Panda and Ugly Bonnet who insist on denying anything I am saying as being truthful- what is that all about guys?

We know you're American. It was obvious from your posts which are completely inaccurate for the UK. But when it was pointed out, instead of saying "Oh okay things must be different there" you decided to pretend you'd also waitressed in the UK. You keep adding more and more bizarre claims (like you earned enough to pay for a degree) that make you look even sillier.

You're not alone. Babyjellyfish has never waitressed ("if I were a waitress...") but rather than admit she doesn't know what she's talking about, she then claimed to have been a waitress for 7 years. I don't know why neither of you can just admit you have strong views that are not supported by real waiting staff.

@TrashPandas but she said she was a waitress between 1999-2002, in which case rent and tuition fees would have been much, much lower then. I don't know whether she's from the UK or not but if she was earning the amount of money she stated (up to £19,000 a year), I reckon she could have paid her rent and tuition fees.

Sorry slightly off topic there I know.

No, what she claims was nonsense in 1999 just as it's nonsense today. She's clearly only experienced American tipping culture.

but she said she was a waitress between 1999-2002, in which case rent and tuition fees would have been much, much lower then. I don't know whether she's from the UK or not but if she was earning the amount of money she stated (up to £19,000 a year), I reckon she could have paid her rent and tuition fees

no, if she wasn’t eligible for loans as a UK national she will be have been paying international student rates. So probably comparable to tuition now.

for example, UCL fees for UK students for physics 21/22 was 9k a year. International students it’s around 31k.

so even allowing for inflation, 10-20k fees, plus london rent, plus bills, plus tube/bus fare, plus some sort of medical ins- if not classes as Uk resident nhs not free- plus food, plus books etc…

i reckon 20k was bare minimum for fees and rent.

Lol @TrashPandas, it's really nothing to me whether you believe I have waitressed or not.

Everything I have said on here is the truth.

It's clear you haven't, because you appear to think tipping isn't the norm in the UK, when it very much is.

Funny how the only other person who claims nearly all UKers tip is the one who lives in another country. And how you said "if I were a waitress". But sure, you're not lying at all 😁

Tipping is not the norm in the UK-unless you mean the service charge added to bills. It hasn’t been the norm for a long time.

Nope, it isn't. People who have actually waitressed know that.

I have always had the impression that people who tip are doing it to show off!

So many non tippers getting their knickers in a twist. If you don't want to tip, fine. No need to get so upset about it.

Yeah exactly.
Never mind all the other former waitstaff (myself included) who have said that it's fine, it's only a minority who insist on arguing.
This thread has been very entertaining.