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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My Parents are a bit selfish don't you think?

184 replies

waterlegoblocks · 17/07/2022 18:15

My Parents live in an area where the water companies have set messages to everyone telling them not to use hosepipes over the coming days due to the extreme heat. When I spoke to my parents earlier they said they are still going to use the hosepipe as they pay a lot of money for water usage and if they are not going to receive a discount for being told not to use water they are going to carry on using it as they like to water their garden most days during the Summer.

OP posts:
Fluffycloudland77 · 17/07/2022 18:46

If they wanted water useage down they’d subsidise dishwasher supply and fitting for low income families. It would save so much water compared to handwashing but instead they send you a water saving tap insert 😤

brown543 · 17/07/2022 18:47

We're on a water meter. I'm not a big waterer but it would cost several thousand pounds to replace the plants in my garden.

So if it's let the plants die or get the hose pipe out, it would be the latter. Some plants are more hardy than others and I can leave them without water but I've already lost a nice acer this year through not watering it enough.

NewNamePrivacyneeded · 17/07/2022 18:47

Yes they are.

ClocksGoingBackwards · 17/07/2022 18:48

I can see where your parents are coming from tbh. Peoples gardens often a mean a lot to them and they can provide older people with a focus and a purpose so I don’t think it’s fair to accuse them of being selfish just because they don’t want all their efforts to go to waste.

They probably do pay a lot for their water, and the water companies should preserve the water they are wasting before they start asking people to sacrifice their gardens and children to sacrifice their paddling pools.

Perfumbaby · 17/07/2022 18:51

BooksAndHooks · 17/07/2022 18:19

I can see their point though. Having spent hundreds probably thousands and several years getting our garden fully planted I am not in a position to just let it all die. Despite watering we have already suffered a lot of loss of plants. Not watering them will kill a huge amount off.

Getting a water tank that takes off water from your drains/rain water is good for this. You can attach your hose and use collected rain water.

dolphinsarentcommon · 17/07/2022 18:51

Fluffycloudland77 · 17/07/2022 18:46

If they wanted water useage down they’d subsidise dishwasher supply and fitting for low income families. It would save so much water compared to handwashing but instead they send you a water saving tap insert 😤

Seriously? You think the government should subsidise dishwashers?

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 17/07/2022 18:53

giraffesaregreat · 17/07/2022 18:45

Maybe they could consider using some of the waste water from their house? We use the washing up water etc to water the plants & it's much less wasteful.

Water the plants with water mixed with washing up liquid? Errr no.

girlmom21 · 17/07/2022 18:54

What's the actual reasoning in the request? "Don't use hosepipes because it's hot" doesn't make sense. "Don't use hosepipes because there could very easily be a water shortage" makes a lot more sense and would make them selfish.

ThinWomansBrain · 17/07/2022 18:55

BooksAndHooks · 17/07/2022 18:19

I can see their point though. Having spent hundreds probably thousands and several years getting our garden fully planted I am not in a position to just let it all die. Despite watering we have already suffered a lot of loss of plants. Not watering them will kill a huge amount off.

Yes, I'm sure that all the people in Europe having to evacuate their homes because of wildfires are full of empathy for you.

SuperCamp · 17/07/2022 18:57

Yes, selfish and irresponsible.

Too late for this heat wave, but a sizeable water butt would be a good investment.

I am on a water meter and so use as much grey water as I can to water my garden. All water from boiling veg / pasta etc cools and goes on plants. I use an eco washing up soap and use it sparingly: fine for watering.

It’s mad that the majority domestic water of a standard to drink is flushed down the toilet. We need to be better at developing grey water systems.

itsjustnotok · 17/07/2022 18:58

I dont think it’s any more selfish than those filling paddling pools. There are a lot popping up here and a few are massive. They don’t care because they use the old but it’s for the kids routine which seemingly makes it ok. So I’d say they aren’t any more selfish than others.

bloodywhitecat · 17/07/2022 18:58

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 17/07/2022 18:53

Water the plants with water mixed with washing up liquid? Errr no.

But why not? The RHS agrees it is a good idea Grey water in the garden

MarshaMelrose · 17/07/2022 19:00

dolphinsarentcommon · 17/07/2022 18:51

Seriously? You think the government should subsidise dishwashers?

Don't be too quick to judge, Dolphin. I like the idea. I don't have a dishwasher because my kitchen is too small. So I think the government should subsidise a kitchen extension to fit my dishwasher? I want to do my bit to save the planet, after all. 🙂

Penfelyn · 17/07/2022 19:01

Well... I'm in the southern hemisphere so it's winter here. So not directly affected by any of this. But when inflation means the cost of life goes up and people struggle to pay their bills, the water company doesn't freeze or reduce their prices, do they ? They consider it's your problem to solve. So why should anyone care that the water companies may be facing difficulties there ? It's their problem to deal with. If they don't care when I have less money why should I care when they have less water ?

I think being wasteful is wrong but the water company is taking the easy way out. Asking people to reduce water usage is easy - it doesn't require making any effort to reduce wastage or improve recycling. They might focus on that first.

(and anyone saying there's no time to do it now - do you think they could have done it last year or last month, or that they will do it tomorrow or next week ? Highly doubtful.)

I'd probably still try to limit my water usage (for the sake of neighbours and friends, not the water company). But not at a great cost to me (for instance, letting die a garden that cost thousands to set up).

SuperCamp · 17/07/2022 19:01

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 17/07/2022 18:53

Water the plants with water mixed with washing up liquid? Errr no.

@WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps
It’s fine. The RHS says so
www.rhs.org.uk/science/gardening-in-a-changing-world/water-use-in-gardens/using-grey-water

PurpleWisteria · 17/07/2022 19:01

We'll be watering the fruit and veg but the lawns and flowers, no.

greatblueheron · 17/07/2022 19:04

I'll be using one to keep my children's pool full of water in this heat. And my fruit trees alive.

Iwantmyoldnameback · 17/07/2022 19:09

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 17/07/2022 18:18

Yeah a bit selfish, but loads of people won't adhere to it. Especially as the water companies often lose 100s of millions of gallons of water a year due to broken drains and faulty/cracked pipes. It's understandable that some people say 'like fuck will I let my plants die, when the water company can't be fucked to fix the issues that piss away 100s of millions of gallons of water a year.'

This!

RaspberryHoney · 17/07/2022 19:10

Just a reminder to put out water for birds, hedgehogs and bees!

MatildaTheCat · 17/07/2022 19:11

I’m certainly all in favour of reusing water and collecting rain to use but like a PP (and I suspect many others on here) I also have a beautiful garden full of wildlife that will die without water.

I’m more inclined to be angry with inefficient water companies who charge a fortune, fail to fix huge water leaks and also the flood our rivers with human waste.

Going forward all of us will be looking towards dry planting but in the meantime I won’t be watching my plants die. The lawn is already gone but that, unlike most other plants does regenerate after a good rainfall.

thereisonlyoneofme · 17/07/2022 19:12

Why does someone always have to insert Brexit into every post.
Oh the suns going to explode, well its Brexit

MatildaTheCat · 17/07/2022 19:12

@Iwantmyoldnameback I cross posted. Grin

MyDogsTheBestDog · 17/07/2022 19:13

No more selfish than a family filling their large paddling pool today. Although really unless they've got pots there's.no need to water so bad gardeningship!

Chaotica · 17/07/2022 19:14

Those of you saying that having a water butt will help are presumably not living anywhere near me. Stored rainwater has been used up weeks ago as we've had very little rain. Grey water works, but we don't have a system for storing it.

RaspberryHoney · 17/07/2022 19:14

We put the sprinkler on in a leafy corner of our garden for a while every night. It was on the news here that everyone with a garden should do that, for the insects, butterflies and bees.

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