DH keeps on and on

[Abak123]

AIBU or is DH?
I had a dd just under 6 weeks ago and also have a DS who is (4). My DH keeps going on and on saying you should take both DD and DS out every day.

I am absolutely knackered my newborn has me up ever 3 hours and I drop my DS off to
preschool for 08:30 - 5 mornings a week.

once I pick DS up I come home,
make lunch for everyone. He goes oh you should take DS to the park/farm/soft play or text Sarah or Mel to see if they fancy a play date. I do take DS out but currently twice a week - he expects it every day!! He hasn’t done one night feed, plus I think it will be the summer holidays so have got 6 weeks to fill out and hopefully I’ll feel back to normal.

he does wfh so I stay downstairs and mostly in the garden - to not disturb him.

AIBU and should take them out every day!

Also you are taking him out every day: to preschool. Where presumably he has messy play, educational play, garden time and fresh air, a general hoot. On her home days my DD has no interest in going out because she’s partied hard at preschool and just wants to chill and potter at home, particularly in this weather.

Does your DH go out for fresh air every day? Join you all for lunch in the garden? Log off early to take DS to the park once it’s cooled down? Or is he a dick?

From the details given I read it as being the OP's first summer with a 4 year old off from preschool. You do realise they change as they grow, right?

Your 4 year old IS getting out - and is probably tired from preschool and wants to relax in HIS HOME.

If your husband doesn't like his wife and children being in their home he can fuck off to the office.

He’s being an absolute arse!

Whst are you getting out of him wfh? Just nagging! The travel time that’s been freed up ought to be used for everyone’s benefit.

He should be doing what he can to reduce the burden on you. Sharing some night feeds if your baby is bottle fed. Doing nursery runs with ds so that you can lie in to make up for the broken nights. Taking ds to the park after he logs off, taking on some of the night times, even if it’s just the weekend ones.

When I had my dd on summer hols after reception, and Ds was a baby, we had quiet mornings every day when we all got up early but when ds had a morning nap, dd was happy to watch a little tv whilst I had a quick nap. Then when I was feeling human we’d go out somewhere every afternoon, often including a lunchtime picnic. We also went to stay with family a fair bit!

I am annoyed at him reading your post and I’m not sleep deprived or exhausted or recovering from birth.

I think I would have told him where to shove his unsolicited opinions and tell him to pull his fucking weight or fuck off.

Also what @Pumpkintopf said

Tell him to fuck off

And he's doing what to look after his own children?

Despise men like this.

Ugh my mum was a bit like this. Asking me why I wasn't going out much with both of my newborns as if a newborn baby cares where they are when they're warm and fed. I had winter babies too so the weather was shit the first couple of months.

Your oldest child is getting out every day to preschool, tbh if I take my kids out for the day I like to leave in the morning so finishing at lunch would make it a bit late for me.

Your DH just wants a nice quiet house to himself so he can do his Big and Important job tell him to go back to the office.

My ex was like this. One of the myriad reasons he's an ex, to be fair. But he was constantly on my case about leaving the house and doing stuff with DD, to the point where it fed entirely into my anxiety about being a shit Mum, and I ended up with PND.

Tell him to fuck off. Seriously.

How haven’t you told him to fuck right off yet?

Tell him if he’s that concerned then he can take 4 year old out to soft play/ park on his lunch break.

EVERY DAY 😂

Tell him be my guess, you can take him out for an hour in your lunch break , after work, after dinner whenever you want. X