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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Sisters new puppy

110 replies

OhSwe3tBaby · 11/07/2022 08:00

I gave birth on Wednesday after a very hard pregnancy. Then on Friday out of the blue my sister buys a new puppy. My sister still lives at home with my parents. This is my seccond child, I moved out of my parents a few years ago.

Yesterday I went round my mums for the afternoon, all my siblings were there with their children too, playing in the pool and we ordered some food, sat in the garden. I got there later than others and when I arrived my sisters new puppy is sat on the only shaded chair around the table, I had to move a chair away from the table to sit with my newborn in the shade. The whole time we were there the topic was about the new puppy and only a few family members had brief holds with my newborn but all seemed to fuss and hold the puppy for alot longer.

I just feel like my newborns limelight of beeing new to the family has been stolen by my sisters new puppy and it was selfish of her to get a new puppy the week I give birth. She had also previously offered to take a few days off after I gave birth and my partner had gone back to work to help me and when I mentioned it she said she's taking a few days off over the next few weeks to be at home with her new puppy and I can come round to her if I wanted.

OP posts:
Rachie1973 · 11/07/2022 08:03

I think new mum hormones are kicking in here, you’re jealous of a puppy.

I doubt it was planned to get it as soon as you gave birth, it’s just the way it’s fallen. Plus it sounds like there are a number of grandchildren in the family, so newborns aren’t a novelty maybe?

Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 11/07/2022 08:04

YABU.

KvotheTheBloodless · 11/07/2022 08:04

Sorry, but YABU. You can't expect other people's lives and plans to go on hold because you've had a baby.

However: congratulations on your new baby! Enjoy all the lovely snuggles with your squidgy newborn, you are so lucky to have him/her.

redtshirt50 · 11/07/2022 08:05

I would probably be more interested in a puppy than a newborn - they are a lot more interactive / fun to play with.

Tbh I would probably have been glad I wasn't the center of attention and could just rest.

I think YABU

It is annoying about the days off, but she is right that she can't leave the puppy.

It's also not like you can (normally) just pick a puppy and get it next week - so I assume she's known the date the puppy would come for a while?

Didimum · 11/07/2022 08:06

You’re being utterly ridiculous. Your sister’s life does not revolve around yours. She can get a puppy any time she wants to.

StrangeCondition · 11/07/2022 08:06

Yeah, I would've been more interested in the puppy but then I don't like babies.

LoudingVoice · 11/07/2022 08:08

Sorry but in the kindest possible way YABU and I think a little melodramatic, enjoy your new baby.

iloveeverykindofcat · 11/07/2022 08:09

I would probably be more interested in a puppy than a newborn - they are a lot more interactive / fun to play with.

That's the thing. Newborns aren't that interesting to most people, though obviously they are the center of their parents' world, as they should be. 2-5 year old humans are fascinating. The puppy is more like at the developmental stage of a toddler, thus cuter and more interesting to a lot of people.

user1471457751 · 11/07/2022 08:10

Puppies are more fun than newborn babies. It also sounds like a puppy is more of a novelty in your family than a baby if there are lots of kids already.

What did you want your sister to do? Put her life on hold for several months so as not to 'steal your limelight'? The breeder would have just sold the puppy yo someone else.

ShirleyPhallus · 11/07/2022 08:12

Puppies are much more interesting than newborns, sorry OP. Plus they’re only at that tiny puppy stage for such a short period compared to babies

MummaTrinee · 11/07/2022 08:15

YABU it's no one needs to dote over your baby except you. Also it's not like they are the first baby of the family.

In all honesty I think you're just a bit hormonal, you'll probably look back at this and laugh at yourself.

Congratulations on your new bundle of joy x

pictish · 11/07/2022 08:15

Don’t be daft…and I mean that kindly. Your sister was not selfish to get a puppy and neither is she stealing your limelight. Other people can do what they like, your baby is not a factor your sister needed to consider. Stop it.

ladydimitrescu · 11/07/2022 08:16

YABU. Your newborn doesn't need limelight. She can get a puppy whenever she likes.
Congrats on your baby, enjoy them and stop sweating the small stuff x

BeeDavis · 11/07/2022 08:17

Get a grip and fast 🤯

Jalisco · 11/07/2022 08:19

I would probably be more interested in a puppy than a newborn - they are a lot more interactive / fun to play with.

I'm afraid I agree. Newborn babies are, honestly, rather overrated. You give them a cuddle, say how sweet they are, and then... what?

But there's also a science behind all this too. When mom and dad see the new baby, levels of oxytocin in the parents rise. It's a lovely natural "drug" that makes us feel good, bond and protect. For some reason not fully understood, puppies and dogs have that effect on human beings. Gaze into their eyes and there is a release of oxytocin, and normally sensible human adults turn to mush. Babies, especially babies that are clothed (it is skin to skin contact that is a major factor in baby / adult oxytocin release) don't have as strong a pull for other adults - some will, but mostly not like the parents. Playing with, stroking, holding a dog has the same affect on humans. They can't help themselves.

I get why you feel somewhat put out, but just accept that not everyone is going to be as interested in your baby as you are, and that is a good thing - you don't want everyone laying claim to them. Enjoy your time with them now - this stage will be over quickly enough.

Marvellousmadness · 11/07/2022 08:20

Bahhaha sorry but yabu
A puppy is way more fun than a baby.

Hoppinggreen · 11/07/2022 08:20

Oh dear
Hopefully you will be laughing at this too in a few months OP

Pugdogmom · 11/07/2022 08:21

Congratulations on your new baby! However, I do think you are being a bit silly here. You sound jealous of a puppy and that's daft.

Frazzled2207 · 11/07/2022 08:22

I can sort of see why you’re upset.

my DPs were totally obsessed when my first dc (first dgc) was born. When I had the second they seemed barely bothered after a 30 second cuddle. It was all about dc1. However now, several years on, they fuss equally over both.

also hormones are raging.

unfortunately 2nd babies just aren’t that interesting to many, other than their parents. Don’t worry everything will settle down and your family will love your second as much as the first. In the meantime keep out of the way of the puppy.

collieresponder88 · 11/07/2022 08:23

Lots of people prefer puppies to babies. You need to get over it I'm afraid

CanaryShoulderedThorn · 11/07/2022 08:27

Maybe your sister is struggling to conceive and can't bear to fuss your newborn as it breaks her heart.

Replacethis · 11/07/2022 08:27

The days after giving birth can be very emotional. It is lovely that at only a few days old your baby is already knee deep in your family and sitting round the new puppy as one of you.

SpartacusNotEsther · 11/07/2022 08:31

I think most people would be more interested in playing with a puppy for longer than fussing over a newborn.

Once your baby is old enough to be interacting, the puppy will not be so cute and your child will most probably get more time than the dog.

Honestly, you can't do much with a newborn.

Mummyoflabradors · 11/07/2022 08:36

I’d rather see the puppy, babies are boring.

chilledbubble · 11/07/2022 08:38

Focus on yourself and let your sister get on with her life as she wants. You don't need to coordinate your lives for PR reasons etc so things are going to happen at the same times sometimes. Enjoy your little bundle x

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