Am in the wrong with my boyfriend?

[horseyhorseyy]

Been together 2 years but lately I'm honestly fed up.
We go away in September and both needed passport renewals.
I did mine three weeks ago and he said he was going to renew his on Monday next week.
We were meant to get his photos done on Thursday but he said he couldn't be bothered (even tho we walked past the shop ) so we said Sunday we will do it.
Now he is saying he will do it next week (even tho he is at work all week)

Today it's red hot here and we are at home watching tv because he can't be bothered to go out.
I said tomorrow has got to be lovely,shall we go to the beach (it's a 5 min drive )
He didn't rely -he said we need to save money.
I said it's literally the beach -or even go for a walk.
He said we will see tomorrow -caused a massive argument because I suggested going out in the sun.

He is meant to take medication daily-he forgets then complains he isn't well.
So I have to mother him
I'm drained
Have I done anything wrong?

Just go to the beach tomorrow and don’t argue.

If he forgets his medication and gets sick, sympathise then go do something else.
Just don’t mother him. He is an adult!

What are his redeeming qualities?

I couldn’t stand that just for one day! Sitting in all day because he can’t be bothered to go out? And he’s making stupid excuses.

Have you been on holiday with him before? I wouldn’t expect it to be much fun.

I wouldn’t push him to do the passport. Let him do it last minute if he wants to.

Yes, you have put up with this shit too long!

You are choosing to be his mother.

No one has forced you.

Raise your bar and dump him.

You choose to mother him… why?

Are you into the whole pathetic man child who wouldn’t manage without a woman thing?

just let him fuck it up and go on holiday without him if necessary.

Now he's making me feel bad for being "bossy"
Im not bossy but if I don't push him to do things he doesn't do it ...or puts it off.
Never been on holiday together.
Im so excited to go,I am terrified that his passport won't come back in time.
Mines been printed so should be here next week -so I'm deffo going anyway.

He can do a photo on his phone, just read the guidelines.

What's his next excuse?

Yep, you’re completely in the wrong if you stay with this loser

don’t be a passenger in your own life. Stick along in his boring ride where he makes you feel like a nag for expecting him to be a grown up and you’ll be complicit in your own misery

Dump him, he's a life-draining twat.

Ugh he sounds like a man child. I think you need to think about if you can accept having to be the responsible and organised person all the time. I've been that person and it's tiring. Don't get me wrong, it's normal for one to maybe take charge and be better at that kind of stuff but the other person has to meet you half way. He sounds like he's fighting against you - it's giving off moody teenager vibes. I say judge how he is on this holiday - if he's even able to go, and make a decision if he's the type of person you see yourself growing and building with.

Men who actually deserve to have female company in their lives never make women feel ‘bossy’

Is this what you want for your life? It’s a genuine question

Go to the beach tomorrow with friends or by yourself.

I'm starting to think it's not.
He's drained me today -to a point I don't care if I stay in all day tomorrow.
It's stupid things like -I made food last night and asked him to put the dishes in the kitchen and said don't put the plates in the sink with rice one-he literally left them on the side with the rice on ...rather than scrape the plates and put them in the sink to be washed .
I made breakfast and he hasn't even washed up -so I will be doing that too.
I know it's stupid things but it bothers me

When his passport doesn't arrive then you go on your own.
Or Dump his irresponsible arse and switch the name and take someone else who can parent themselves.

Has he always been like this? As in you having to mother him, or has it got worse since you moved in together? Has he ever lived independently, or did he go from living with his mum to living with you?

Is his medication for depression?

I’d ignore him.

Assume he doesn’t want to go on holiday with you, and make plans to go yourself / with friends. Ask him once if he wants to go out for the day - or tell him what your plans are. If he doesn’t respond, go ahead without him.

You’ll soon find out if he actually wants to spend time with you or not - and if not, point him towards the door. Life’s too short for this crap.

@SaggyBlinders no it's for brittle asthma.
I'm starting to think he enjoys being ill.

God he sounds lazy and boring!

Call a friend and make plans to go to the beach or for a walk, let him fuck up his passport and go on holiday with someone else.

Guess if he’s ill you’re looking after him and he doesn’t have to do anything? Not a very attractive quality being intentionally so helpless.

Take time to look on mn for all the many many threads about men like the one you are with. They never change.
Just make sure you don’t have a child with him.

Stop mothering him and let him show you his true colours, otherwise you’re pushing him to be something he’s not and of course that’s draining for you and annoying for him.

Ugh, run for the hills before you waste any more time on this man child, or end up tied to him for ever after having children (where you'll have to do everything).

I think it's fine as long as you don't want kids because parenting with him will be a world of pain.