Being "stalked" by Peri-Whisperer

[FatCatSkinnyRat]

I have a friend who has become a "therapist" in peri-menopause and has started holding weekend workshops to "equip women with tools for facing peri-menopause head on". I think it is hypnotherapy / thought control kind of stuff.

The thing is, even though I am 49, I don't have symptoms yet so I am OK actually for now. The first time she messaged me it was on FB as part of a group message so I just deleted.

Then, she messaged me directly and said "Hey hun just wondering if you will be joining us for peri-fest?" and forwarded on the original email. I replied that I am OK for now but will keep it in mind if issues arise.

The she started texting me directly, with the message "you are probably experiencing anxiety and fear around the upcoming peri-menopause - come and face it head on with us on xx weekend! I am here if you need!" I again replied "I am OK for now, thank you, please don't send me any more info about peri-fest. I will let you know if I need it".

She then messages my husband! "See if you can get FatCat to come to peri-fest! It will make her life (and yours!) much easier during the transition through the menopause. Even if she is not suffering now she definitely will be soon and it is best to get in front of it!"

I was so pissed off at this last one and have disengaged with her on FB and blocked her number on my phone. It is a shame I had to do this but it was getting too much. The problem is my DH has just started working with her DH. He thinks I should go to it not to talk about peri-menopause but to support my friend (by buying a ticket) who recently jacked in her stable career to become some kind of peri-whisperer.

But frankly I resent being fear mongered to, and basically stalked until I say yes. It feels like me to be some weird offshoot of a MLM by using friend network. My DH thinks I should just chill and go. The whole thought of the even makes me shudder. Plus I would just resent it all day. AIBU?

Kale, laughter yoga, primal screaming workshops and feckin quinoa will be involved.

Fucking hell @nothingfound did the woman in that clip accidentally say they want to 'impair' women instead of 'empower' them??😂

Watched that video. I think it should come with a warning label.

Well, not everyone gets horrible symptoms with the menopause! You only need these services if you’re affected OP so stick to your guns. No point getting yourself worked up about something that might not be relevant for a few years, or ever…

Yeah it’s annoying getting hassled but I’d probably go if it was free.
Im open to the odd herbal remedy not sure about a trance though.
She’s obviously “passionate” about it.

But it isn't free.

I have also found it online, op can you tell your friend her profile page needs a proof read.
To be honest if I was in the slightest bit interested the lack of attention to detail and care would put me right off.

That's my point. I wouldn't pay.

Tell her she needs to keep an open mind to the fact some people will not want to go down her path/journey and to open her mind to this. let her know your dh is all up for supporting her so get him to buy a ticket

by 49 I’d gone through both and my mate sat telling me all about it and what I’d got to come - not everyone has the same experience. People go through such varied experiences and if she is not understanding of you not want to join the group - how can she be a decent practitioner?

Jehovaries Witnesses?

Every time she calls just make the Perry the Platypus noise at her and refuse to speak.

Your friend sounds way too pushy. I wouldn’t go to the session unless I wanted to. I certainly wouldn’t be guilt-tripped into going to give her ‘support’.

Tell her you are an extremely well passing trans woman. That will send her into a spin.

It's pretty obvious that hardly anyone has signed up for her workshop. You are needed to make up numbers and shortfall in income.

Ever since that bloody Davina McCall documentary it’s impossible to have a conversation about health with any woman of a certain age about health with them suggesting it’s menopause related. Ingrowing toenail? Menopause, leg dropped off? Menopause. No symptoms at all? You’ve probably forgotten because of the menopause.

Just a thought. Hopefully her husband will train as an erectile disfunction therapist and, when the time comes, you will urge your DH to attend his workshop.

I needed a good laugh this morning and you all delivered

I never craved nandos so much

2 words will do here...
Fuck off & then fuck off some more if that's not enough

She's not your friend, she just sees you as a target, I used to have friends like this too. We are no longer friends. It is no better than pyramid selling

Yep. After years of fighting to not be dismissed on the basis of being mere females at the mercy of their hormones compared to Men, we're back to being told we're helpless hormonal animals and It's Your Age, Dear.

I'm so glad I had a diagnosis of Psoriatic Arthritis before this latest trend, as these days, I'd be refused any investigations or the treatment that has given me a life and extended my projected lifespan past about 64 (autoimmune diseases dramatically reduce life expectancy when untreated - my father dropped dead from it aged 54) - and I'd have been gaslit that it was my crusty ovaries causing every classic symptom in the process.

This is hilarious.

Perhaps there'd also be time for some group weaving of hessian sacks clothes out of natural fibres. Maybe even into pants if the group haberdashery skills are up to it?

Although sewing makes me really angry, which is also a feature of my peri, so maybe not. In fact, just a dartboard with some pictures of my family would probably hit the mark for my therapy. That's for leaving out 5,000 glasses, that's for snoring like a freight train, that's for putting empty ice cream packets back in the freezer.

On the question in hand, I'd dig my heels in and say no. It's bloody rude and asking your husband crosses a line of acceptability. My cousin became a little like that with aloe vera pills. You asked me, I've said no, please stop haranguing me.

Glad you have got the treatment that you needed. In fairness my GPS are great, it’s very other fucker!

I was at a meeting at work with the lead GP for the area I live in. He was saying that the documentary has been part of the explanation for a huge surge in requests for appts (along with MH relating to coming out of lockdown).

Not everyone suffers awful symptoms of menopause, never mind perimenopause! I know, because I didn't. I know not everyone is so lucky, but really, being pestered to spend precious weekends, contemplating 10 years of miserable decline into old age, is unnecessary. In my 40s we luckily hadn't heard of perimenopause, and my life was glorious, children more independent, I was able to develop my career, enjoy travel and hobbies etc. I look back on that time as the best decade of my life.

If you DH is so concerned about it he can go to her peri-fest (so cringe worthy, I wouldn't go on principal even of I had raging menopause symptoms

I'd cut off anyone who felt it appropriate to message partner to say I should do something - such infantalising behaviour!!!

Urgh - first rule of sales is find out what your potential customers want. If they say no thanks, do not persist!

Say you'll send money for the ticket.....but you keep forgetting....brain fog.....

She's not a decent practitioner, she's a pal on the make.