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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To cancel a date due to heatwave?

93 replies

savebuckbeak · 06/07/2022 16:11

First date with someone on Friday in London. Just seen that it's 28C even towards the evening. I don't cope well in the heat and at its worst it makes me feel quite unwell. AIBU to cancel?

OP posts:
Justcallmebebes · 06/07/2022 16:14

Yes. I would think that a really poor excuse if someone cancelled on me because it's hot!! It's not even that hot

Crunchymum · 06/07/2022 16:16

Yuck I have just seen the forecast.

I want to do as little as possible in that type of heat.

BUT if it was someone I really wanted to see I'd suck it up.

Original poster
savebuckbeak · 06/07/2022 16:18

I'll suck it up probably! Should have said I also have a medical condition which makes me v sensitive to heat. I usually just sit around with my mini fan and an ice pack but can't really do that on a date...

OP posts:
Sandinmyknickers · 06/07/2022 16:24

Yeah if someone cancelled on me because it was going to be 28 degrees, I would think they were not that into me and move on.

If you suggested maybe changing what you are doing for a date to suit the weather (I.e. somewhere that would definitely have Air con or an outdoor rooftop bar), then I would think you just want to make sure the date is a really good one.

liveforsummer · 06/07/2022 16:25

If be over the moon, could dress up in some nice clothes without multiple layers, sit outside somewhere nice without shivering or hair blowing around. I'd be pretty put out of a date cancelled on me with that as the reason.

Skinnermarink · 06/07/2022 16:27

I’d think it was a bit wet but you say you have a condition so ok… plenty of places with air con.

FavouritePi · 06/07/2022 16:38

Either go somewhere without too much travel and air conditioning or give a completely different, yet believable excuse.

Pipsquiggle · 06/07/2022 16:51

Your 2nd post is pretty important information.

I wouldn't cancel but would plan it so that you're in an air conditioned bar / restaurant and you wouldn't have to be on the tube at busy times.

Or is this definitely an outside date - walking or something. In which case I would try to persuade them to do a bar /restaurant

IGotItInTheSales · 06/07/2022 16:51

It's not a heatwave.... it's just summer weather

CaptainMyCaptain · 06/07/2022 16:52

Justcallmebebes · 06/07/2022 16:14

Yes. I would think that a really poor excuse if someone cancelled on me because it's hot!! It's not even that hot

Yes. I would assume you were making excuses and not bother again.

LoobyDop · 06/07/2022 16:56

I voted YABU, but thinking about it I’d prefer to know, because if you really hate even slightly hot weather, we’d be fundamentally incompatible and it would be a waste of time.

Cas112 · 06/07/2022 17:01

I would ask to do something / go somewhere with a good cooling system / aircon

Thereisnolight · 06/07/2022 17:03

Unless your date really hates heat too I would say you’ll be incompatible.

Darcy101 · 06/07/2022 17:04

I’d just be honest with your date, how the heat affects you. You never know they might feel the same.

If I was your date I’d be like hurrah! let’s make another plan!

yellowsmileyface · 06/07/2022 17:05

Well, you can cancel a date for whatever reason you want. If you really feel like you'll just be uncomfortable and unable to enjoy it, I'd cancel, as you probably wouldn't make the best first impression anyway in that case.

However, I wouldn't tell him the real reason. It does come across as just an excuse.

BatshitCrazyWoman · 06/07/2022 17:12

Not quite as hot as that, according to the Met Office. I hate the heat, but would be all over a date on a day when it was freezing and everyone was moaning about that 😂

To cancel a date due to heatwave?
Original poster
savebuckbeak · 06/07/2022 17:13

We're going to a bar/restaurant in London. Not sure if they have air con. I'll call them tomorrow and check!

OP posts:
Original poster
savebuckbeak · 06/07/2022 17:14

@BatshitCrazyWoman Ah! The Beeb is saying 28.

OP posts:
Mariposa80 · 06/07/2022 17:18

Not unreasonable if you're really going to hate it but it would make me realise we were incompatible. I love the heat.

Original poster
savebuckbeak · 06/07/2022 17:19

@LoobyDop Really? You'd write someone off completely, even if you got along super well and there was chemistry and attraction, due to weather preferences?

OP posts:
2bazookas · 06/07/2022 17:21

Just suggest to the date that you meet somewhere cool /shady (park, hotel bar with A/C .

LubaLuca · 06/07/2022 17:23

That's not a good excuse, and I'd be quite upset if someone only wanted to see me if it was cardie weather.

Change the venue and sit outside. Make the most of wearing some lovely summer clothes and sipping lovely summer drinks.

SummerWinterSummerWinter · 06/07/2022 17:27

Yeh go for it, cancel and postpone if you won't be at your best - but make a different excuse!

I would want to cancel because I feel the same BUT I'd also judge someone who used that as a reason as a bit of a wet blanket! Ironic I know.

BarbedButterfly · 06/07/2022 17:29

People who don't suffer ill effects don't get it. Most people will enjoy the summer heat, but I burn quickly even with high factor, get heat rashes, faint and it also causes my RA to flare. If it is anything above 24 degrees I won't leave the house.

Of course, it is up to you. If the place is air conditioned I might well go though because it would be lovely to sit inside.

KillerQueenGunpowderGelatine · 06/07/2022 17:35

I wouldn't want to go on a date with someone who assumes everyone is a robust, completely well, person with no underlying health conditions. (So I wouldn't date most of these Mumsnet posters!) That kind of heat makes me sick as a dog.

YABNU at all and if your date thinks you are, they are not the one for you.