To cancel a date due to heatwave?

[savebuckbeak]

First date with someone on Friday in London. Just seen that it's 28C even towards the evening. I don't cope well in the heat and at its worst it makes me feel quite unwell. AIBU to cancel?

@PeanutButterOnToad Don't piss yourself too hard...a heatwave is defined as an increase by 5 or more degrees in the average temperature, over a period of 3 days. Average temp in the summer tends to be 20/21 degrees C, so 28 degrees C is absolutely a heatwave.

@RedRec Look up the definition. It's a heatwave.

I really wouldn't cancel. Freeze a plastic bottle of water and take it with you, keep it close by on your journey to meet up, hold it to your wrists etc, and then sip it as it melts. You'll be ok.

I have MS and can't function in the sun, it's bloody awful. Luckily my DP isn't a sun worshiper.

It's get to the meeting ASAP and stay in the air conditioning for the evening until the heat drops.

Thanks to everyone for their responses/input/advice. Just to clarify, I'm not always totally incapacitated by the sun, but I get enough first date nerves as it is so not feeling optimal and potentially a bit sick on a first date was more the concern. Doesn't mean I'm always a hermit in general life and that everyone will be incompatible with me!

I'm definitely going to go - have checked the place has air con, and will wear cool clothes and drink a lot of water and arrive in good time so I'm not flustered. Wish me luck!

I'm sorry you have had some unhelpful replies. I hope you enjoy your date.

Ffs, it's not "wet" to have a medical condition!

Some people are such dickheads on MN about this sort of thing. Personally my eczema flares when it gets to 25+, I get huge heat rashes and my face/eyes swell. If it's pushing 30, even travelling to somewhere with air con is probably a no-go.

Good luck though op, hope you have a lovely time!

Good grief. How do you think people in hot countries cope? Never go out/socialise? Stay inside all the time? 28 isn't a heatwave.

People forget UK infrastructure mostly isn't designed for very hot weather. We don't routinely have air con in our homes or offices, or on public transport. Compare to the US for example the hot summer days are a totally different experience here. And our summers are getting hotter year by year as well, 28 is above average for July.

28 is a heatwave where I live.

@knockyknees I think they probably cope due to a range of factors.

1. In countries with hotter climates, public infrastructure is designed to keep out the heat, and it's very typical to have air con both in public buildings and transport and within homes.
2. I live in London which experiences a phenomenon called "urban heat island" - this is where cities replace natural land cover with dense concentrations of pavement, buildings, and other surfaces that absorb and retain heat. The lack of vegetation means that the temperature can be up to 10 degrees higher that surrounding rural areas. The population density of London compounds this effect.
3. I suspect that those that grow up in hotter climates do tend to acclimatise over time.
4. Depending on where, humidity (or lack of), sea air, etc, also play a part. For example, often when I've been on summer holidays in places like Greek and Cyprus (yes, I do go on summer holidays), despite the very hot weather, it's felt very tolerable.
5. As I said in my earlier post, I suffer from an underlying health condition. There are many health conditions which have heat intolerance as a significant symptom - look it up. I suspect that those who live in hotter climates who have such health conditions do indeed suffer.

This isn't supposed to be a snarky response, I'm actually trying to be helpful, though I'm not convinced you'll find it so. I'm a bit mystified by some of these sneery and reactionary responses.

@goodwinter Thank you! You sound lovely.

As a person with several medical conditions that worsen/affect my ability to tolerate heat and bright sunlight I would definitely be completely incompatible with someone who loved heat/hot weather/sun exposure.

It affects my health too much not to consider seriously, and was a factor in my last relationship and it was very difficult to balance tbh.

@ZiraCitrine I understand that, for sure. But I think it's probably still possible to make a relationship work with some people, if there is otherwise enough love, understanding and affection.

Jesus, I see the vipers are out in full force today.

28c is a heatwave when it's a prolonged period of time. OP has medical conditions that makes her compromised in the heat, in LONDON - well known for being suffocatingly hot when it's 25+c, not to mention the bloody tube!

I don't have a condition and I'd still baulk at going on a date in 28c in London - I'd be a sweaty, probably irritable mess and not make the best first impression. That said, I'd probably still do it because I'm a glutton for punishment

Good luck OP!

If it was a post about a man who had cancelled a first date because of 28 degree heat, he would be ridiculed on here.

I'm sure its possible to find a date venue thats air conditioned in the whole of London within a short journey of the OP's home - I'm assuming she won't be travelling direct from work because her condition would appear to rule out working, travelling to work, etc too. Equally, depending on circumstances, travel out to somewhere like Epping Forest and go for a walk in the shade or similar.

But I think it's probably still possible to make a relationship work with some people, if there is otherwise enough love, understanding and affection.

But this is a first date. You presumably barely know each other, never mind have love, understanding and affection. If you create a bad impression by cancelling a first date for a reason that sounds to the average person to be quite a flakey reason, you are fairly unlikely to get a second chance.

I do speak though from having stupidly put up with a flakey ex boyfriend for too long, who would cancel dates because he had a cold or because it was raining, so I may not have an entirely neutral perspective. In his case, it was all about him creating himself to be a fragile sort of victim who could never be questioned and who everyone else had to run around after to keep happy.

Would it be acceptable to cancel a date in THIS heatwave? :D

Don't be such a wimp / suck up / just get on with it 😂

Just kidding of course. It is horrid.

Did you make your date?