To ask for your opinion on these messages?

[CrochetNut123]

In your opinion are these messages flirty or not? A is male, B is female.

A - Hey, how did the class go? I never made it, sorry! Let me know which one it is and I will do it tonight.
B - I’ve not done it yet, it’s tomorrow at 5.30 😀
A - ah OK, will try and jump on it tomorrow 😀good luck, get near the front 😂
B - I’ll do my best! I’m going with my friend so we’ll be barging our way to the front 😂

😆😆😆

Oh hang on…shit, am I now flirting with Mango?
It’s all so confusing.
And flirty.

oh i wondered if that was the case op.
oh dear,
they are not flirty
your partner is being possessive

Its not really the same as polite smiling in real life, is it?

I think if you've encountered one of those confident-but-nice-shy-but-cheeky verbose player types, you will have encountered the multiple emoji use, normally fairly rare in heterosexual men. But if thats the norm for your friends, then perhaps not.

Maybe time to end your relationship - there is absolutely nothing wrong with those messages. Why did your DP see them anyway?

then got accused of being flirty which completely blindsided me...His opinion is that as our relationship is not working well at the minute (he’s absolutely right with that), I shouldn’t be interacting with other men in a flirty way

Red flag. Don't ignore it.

Don't let him lead you into second guessing yourself. His paranoia is his alone. You weren't flirting. You know that because...you weren't flirting.

How dare he tell you how to behave.

This kind of jealous paranoia doesn't get any better, especially if you 'let this one go.'

I hope you reminded him that you're an adult who can talk to men or women EXACTLY how you choose to. You don't need his paranoid little compass of relationship morality to guide you.

I hope you then followed it up with 'fuck off.'

You're not being flirty OP but A sounds a bit too interested for my liking.

Not flirty at all, in my opinion.

not flirty at all

Not flirty in the slightest.

I think the bit that could possibly be interpreted as flirty is saying for you to get near the front & you saying that you'll try.

If your OH doesn't trust you though there's no point is there?

You are absolutely right. There is nothing remotely flirty about your messages. Even when actively looking to spot something flirty, I couldn’t see anything. He’s projecting his own issues on you and trying to make them your responsibility.

Not flirty at all. You said ye are having other problems so this is an easy spot to hit.

I use a lot of emoji's! I even get them (don't send them) in professional emails these days.

The messages aren’t flirty but is the activity one wear you’d be wearing tight Lycra and your husband thinks you want to show off to the colleague?

B is obviously keen and wants to meet up. A is telling B they are going with a friend so don't get too keen. Thats my take..

Not in the least bit flirty. If A had ended the "get near the front" comment with a wink emoji rather than a laugh, then that would be a little different but it's quite clear from that you just view him as a friend.

Seems a normal interaction between friends to me. If your boyfriend's approach to working on your relationship is to be jealous and controlling, it's time to leave. It's definitely not your friend's fault. (I loathe couples who project their issues onto innocent bystanders, it causes so much harm.)

Dump your boyfriend. He's a twat.

I think they could have moved in that direction and if they had, A would have been happy.
B wasn't biting and the reference to going with a friend was to manage A's expectations.

Not flirty, but I guess it depends how secure you are in your relationship, if people are already insecure then they can find fault with just about everything.

His opinion is that as our relationship is not working well at the minute (he’s absolutely right with that), I shouldn’t be interacting with other men in a flirty way. I just can’t see what was flirty at all.

I think some of this comes down to the way in which men and women often communicate in slightly different ways. It's not hard and fast of course, but there are some differences. As women, we know we often have to appease people. We're treading a fine line between annoying men, and seeming over-friendly and we don't really want to do either. Be seen as being rude and men can become intimidating. Be seen as overly flirtatious and they get the wrong message.

So to you, this is just friendly banter. To your partner, there's something else going on. To him, and a lot of men, any friendliness from women is interpreted as flirtatious. I mean it's usually wishful thinking but friends of friends have been convinced that I fancy them because I've smiled at them. And I can't even flirt when I want to, so god knows what was going on there.

I would examine what else is going on in your relationship. What is it that's not working? It's not just about this exchange. I suspect if you dig, there's something really quite wrong.

Not flirty in the SLIGHTEST.
YABU

Why is the op being unreasonable? I think you haven’t read the thread

Red flag. Don't ignore it.

Don't let him lead you into second guessing yourself. His paranoia is his alone. You weren't flirting. You know that because...you weren't flirting.

I agree!

You showing him a message from a man for no reason is an instant red flag.

The messages are not flirty and it’s time you realised why your DP said they were.

He only thinks it was flirty because it was a man. He'd have no issue with those self same exact messages had it been a woman. You've done nothing wrong.