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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Kids may be kids but also need to take responsibility

110 replies

Stinkyfirecracker · 27/06/2022 20:05

We are very lucky to be able to get top end equipment when we decide to purchase something. This does mean that when our daughters school said she could have a lap top to help her with certain lessons, we got her a £1,000 worth of laptop as it seemed to fit the bill the best.

She has come home tonight and it is very damaged. She dropped it and it may have to be replaced.

She has an account she knows about with over £1k in it. Would it be unfair to ask for her to help (to the tune of maybe 25%) towards the costs of replacement.

We can replace it easily but I am just wondering about the principle of such a lesson making her value what she’s got and being less casual. After all, a contribution like that wouldn’t drain the account (and actually she has a lot more in accounts she doesn’t even know about like isa’s and pensions) but it would be a dent and she is very concerned about net worth and saving so it would hit her.

Is this a lesson you would teach your child at this age? And yes, she’s only 11 so this is why I am hesitant.

OP posts:
Riverlee · 27/06/2022 20:07

How old is your child? How repentant is she - horrified, or casual ?

TowerRavenSeven · 27/06/2022 20:08

Did where you bought it from offer insurance?

WhatNoRaisins · 27/06/2022 20:08

I think it's also a lesson for you too. Did they really need a £1000 laptop for school work? Did they insist on such an expensive one?

Sweetmotherofallthatisholyabov · 27/06/2022 20:08

How did she drop it? Is she clumsy? Did she ask for it? Does she need it?

my thoughts would be she didn't ask for it or for the most expensive one. I'd also assume she doesn't actually need it and a bigger lesson would be it doesn't get replaced.

Riverlee · 27/06/2022 20:08

Sorry, just saw shes 11. I think it depends on how it got dropped and her response.

Hugasauras · 27/06/2022 20:09

It should have been insured. Accidents happen, especially with 11yos. I've dropped a laptop before and broken the screen and I wasn't being careless, I just tripped.

Original poster
Stinkyfirecracker · 27/06/2022 20:09

She was pretty horrified and repentant but she’s not exactly in a bad mood

OP posts:
Stompythedinosaur · 27/06/2022 20:10

I think that if it wasn't insured, then that is your watch out as the parents.

Unless she deliberately broke it, I wouldn't make her pay. Either insure the replacement or get something more moderately priced.

WhatNoRaisins · 27/06/2022 20:10

Also did she drop it herself or could there be bullying involved. Based on my own school days I'd be wary of sending in anything expensive or delicate.

Hugasauras · 27/06/2022 20:10

Also I'm struggling to work out why a £1000 laptop is the best fit for an 11yo's school work. One a third of the price would be fine.

Original poster
Stinkyfirecracker · 27/06/2022 20:10

Could do it under home insurance but that just means you pay a higher premium. They get you somehow

OP posts:
Colinthesnail · 27/06/2022 20:10

Grossly unfair - you’re the utterly crazy people who gave an 11 year old child a very expensive piece of delicate equipment to take to school and presumably didn’t insure it!

I might take a small amount off her if she’d deliberately thrown it or was being really silly with it, but just dropping stuff is what kids (and adults) do.

OnaBegonia · 27/06/2022 20:11

An 8 yr old doesn't need a £1000 laptop despite your ability to
buy top end

Original poster
Stinkyfirecracker · 27/06/2022 20:13

No no bullying.

OP posts:
Original poster
Stinkyfirecracker · 27/06/2022 20:14

Ok @Colinthesnail just asking a question.

OP posts:
EatYourVegetables · 27/06/2022 20:14

And what did you learn from this?

titchy · 27/06/2022 20:14

Your mistake for buying the wrong spec - you suck it up.

Hankunamatata · 27/06/2022 20:14

On the fence. You were a little naive about sending a 1k laptop to school without insurance.

You can buy rugged laptop cases that completely enclose the laptop. It's easy to drop laptop at school if it's on a desk or while putting it away.

Original poster
Stinkyfirecracker · 27/06/2022 20:15

It’s pretty average equipment for the school.

OP posts:
manysummersago · 27/06/2022 20:15

I don’t think an eleven year old should have been given such an expensive laptop.

BuffaloCauliflower · 27/06/2022 20:16

This is mainly your fault for buying an unnecessarily expensive computer to be honest, there’s no way she needed a £1000 one or that that was the only suitable option. A £300 one would have been just fine, and much more sensible for an accident prone child. Perhaps her paying £100 contribution towards a £300 would a reasonable consequence, this if your lesson to learn as well

Littlebirdyouaresosweet · 27/06/2022 20:17

Exh bought our young dc such expensive tech. Told him he needed it insured... Yabu to not have proper laptop insurance.. My dd's tech cost 300 and is insured...

Hankunamatata · 27/06/2022 20:19

I should say I ended up dropping my sons laptop while putting it away in a bag so its easily done.
We have gone with ipads and magic keyboards for school as they can be completely enclosed in armour casing

MrsTerryPratchett · 27/06/2022 20:20

Sounds like it was you who bought a ridiculously expensive piece of kit. So why should she pay? Kids drop things.

RandomQuest · 27/06/2022 20:20

Poor kid, she’s only 11 which really isn’t old enough to be responsible for something so expensive and fragile, not to mention it sounds like a genuine accident. And have you honestly never broken anything by accident?? She doesn’t need to learn a lesson, you do! Replace it for her with something cheaper so damage isn’t such a big deal. Don’t take her money.