To not 'get' the weight lifting craze?

[bellaiceberg]

It's only my own opinion, and I accept we are all different, blah blah.
But I don't get the contemporary obsession with building muscle. Keeping toned and fit? Yes. Strong and capable? Yes, sure!
But basically eliminating natural female curves and softness to a large extent makes no sense to me. For those who are into body sculpting, that's great, but for the general population?

It kind of reminds me of Germaine Greer when she asked why is 'equality' now about imitating men, rather than men meeting us in the middle?
We women do seem to be growing more and more towards the masculine whilst pushing the naturally feminine away somewhat. Strength is something that isn't always skin deep, and our natural bodies perform just perfectly without terrifying hip thrusts and being able to lift up a small car.

Im exaggerating, but I do feel that our culture is becoming more and more weird about women's bodies. Building muscle in theory is great, and we do tend to lay more fat down, but there's a point where it all starts getting weird. Just seen images of a woman with a fabulous figure who was slightly overweight. She had soft curves and looked pretty fit. Everyone advised her to get everything built up at the gym, that her curved thighs and soft (flat) stomach were not 'healthy'.

AIBU to think it is all bollox? That it's gone from a healthy fitness thing towards a fear of the feminine? I know many women dont have curves and are still obviously feminine. I also know that what we term 'masc/fem' is pretty fluid anyway. But I am strictly focusing on weight training here, and the idea that this is the optimal way for a woman to get fit and healthy.

If I look at some instagram accounts where people are into this, I would honestly say it's more of a fashion/vanity project that health related, for both men and women. Whilst some are concentrating on having exaggerated 'booty's', others are desperate to eliminate any softness or curve. As if it is wrong to have any soft flesh at all.

I agree that muscle is as much feminine as masculine, but we still live in a society where our culture teaches boys to look down on anything traditionally associated with girls (from colours ~ pink!, emotional expression, nurturing, softness, intuition, etc). IMHO we have had to imitate men to become acceptable as opposed to men gaining more respect for US.

And yes yes i know people will pile on and say weight training saved their life/the third world/their obesity, etc. But I do think it's bonkers when a perfectly healthy woman is told any softness is unhealthy.

I don't want to be a tank, but me doing weights (in a class, not weight lifting in a gym) is most definitely motivated by me wanting to build muscle and nothing to do with calorie burn (I appreciate that it does) or changing my metabolic weight.

I run (my main love), swim (a more recent love which I do as non-weight bearing and for the breathing) and cycle, which really make my heart race.

Oh yeah. See what you mean. Definitely the case for many, yes.

Weightlifting gives you curves believe it or not. Have a friend who lost 5 stone through weightlifting and walking 10k steps a day and watching her diet. Looks amazing. Instead of an apple shape, she has a defined waist and a pert arse now. I'm very jealous, but incredibly proud of her.

Sadly despite lifting and running twice a week I'm more defined but have a distinct layer of fat on top due to not watching what I eat. I still love lifting weights though. Feel shit if I don't even though I don't look much better for it.

YABU

Lifting weights is about health. I am still fat as heck but I am strong, my knees don't hurt, I can get up off the floor, I can carry the shopping and my back problems/RSI have gone away. No curves disappeared on me. Or my CrossFit girls who are all younger and gorgeous and still very female looking

It depends how old you are op, yoga and pilates might cut it for you now but as you get older you may need more

While my practical motivation for weight-lifting is long term physical health, I genuinely really love how it's made me look. I don't even know how anyone considers it unfeminine. It's literally just extra curves. The shape of my upper arms, is literally hourglass from my delts to my biceps. My legs, from my hamstrings to my calves, are hourglass. We supposedly see, hourglass as a lovely womanly shape, but having hourglass arms and legs is manly? It doesn't make sense.

Another cosmetic bonus to weightlifting, is that it's essentially a free breast-lift. As a large breasted woman who breastfed for years, my breasts used to swing low. While it's not magic, building up my pectoral muscles has filled my breasts up top and lifted them enough that my nipples point upward again. While I'm never going to be super pert, as a 32E I never was, my mid-40s breasts look about as good as they did when I was in my early 20s. My butt is every bit as high as it was then too, probably higher.

And lastly, despite my waist being as narrow as it was when I was 16, my face is also full as my diet is high in fat and protein. We've all heard that saying, that at a certain point, you have to choose between your arse and your face. Well, a good strength building habit means you get both. You get a better arse than ever while still eating in a way that keeps your face as youthful as it can be as you age.

Also op alot of my feminity comes from what's on the inside

Sorry but I like seeing more women doing weights in the gym. Not because I'm some pervy bloke but it balances out the meatheads that have annoyingly dominated weights sections for far too long.

The fact that women feel more comfortable nowadays is great and I even work out with my daughters sometimes, which is a win win. Years ago they'd be too intimidated, which is a shame given the huge benefits for women.

I agree there's a massive trend for squats and hip thrusts, in a bid to develop the glutes. There definitely seems to be some unhealthy aspects when people believe and follow photoshopped or fake images on Instagram. This definitely needs to stop (the fakery I mean) but doing weights is better than none. I think we just need to address the psychological aspects to ensure more healthy perceptions of ourselves.

I go to a cross training place which really likes it's weights. Some of the ladies are absolute beasts and they look awesome. They're lifting more than body weight and they DO NOT look like men or whatever. The body confidence is contagious and just brilliant to be around.

I tend to partner up with a couple of the ladies if possible as they were always "FUCK YOU LIFT ONE MORE" and their urge to push themselves makes me push myself harder.

As a previous poster said, anything which dilutes the quota of meat heads in the gym is a good thing.

I've weight trained since my early twenties and it makes me feel so well.

Now I'm 40+ I know how good it is for my bones too.

Sorry I think you are being U.

Women who aim for and whose bodies allow them to achieve such an extreme look are definitely in the minority.

Wow she looks fantastic.

Danai Gurira is my inspiration 😁❤️

They're lifting more than body weight and they DO NOT look like men or whatever

I can deadlift more than double my body weight and I don’t look remotely masculine.

I haven't read the whole thread so apologies if this has been said before but some weight-lifting can absolutely support the development of a 'feminine' figure - it's called getting thicc, basically filling out your whole body but putting mass (muscle and fat) on the 'right' parts of your body.

I started weight-lifting last year and my body shape has totally changed. I used to be very wiry, skinny with only minimal curves. Toning, building, squatting, carb-loading that go alongside weight-lifting has filled me out in all the 'right' places.

My chest muscles have really lifted my previously droopy, sad-looking boobs so they look about three times the size.
Epic amounts of squatting means my thighs and bum have gotten bigger and firmer.
My shoulders have gotten broader which accentuates the 'nip' at my waist.

That suits me because I didn't like the way I looked before and I'm happy to have a more 'traditional' female figure as a result of lifting. I'm not aiming for massive bulk. But some of my weight-lifting friends are. They're aiming for huge muscles and quite masculine figures. Other women who I lift with are looking to lose weight and get wiry. Quite a significant number of women at my gym are using weight-lifting as a way to support their eating disorder recovery so are actively looking for their bodies to get 'bigger' (more muscular and fatter) in a healthy way.Other women that go to the gym aren't thinking about their body changes, they're just enjoying the feeling of getting stronger.

And all of that is completely fine, I would never, ever judge another female lifter for their technique, abilities, motivations or goals. Neither should you, how ever women want to sculpt their bodies is a totally individual choice.

So what if a woman does look "masculine", anyway? I'm so sick of the assertion that a woman is only a "real" woman if she conspicuously goes in and out. Women who happen to be straight up and down are as "real" as women who are hourglass. This is not a personal beef, btw; I'm notably "feminine" in figure even when I'm not doing weights, and more so when I am, but I'm so over the questioning of femininity of women who are built differently.

It's really our generation's social conditioning that muscles are masculine and real woman must be fragile. Youngsters nowadays are proud of their shapely legs and trained backsides.

Women improving their bone density and muscle strength is a great thing.

I've got elderly relatives in their 80s/90s struggling to function because their bones and muscles are too weak. The 90 year old has regular minor fractures from no obvious cause. Their bodies have given up before their organs and brains, and still they exist on in pain with no quality of life.

That generation was shafted by notions of feminine physique and decreasing physical lifestyle. As they stopped walking and carrying the shopping because they learned to drive and got a Mini, as housework became less manual, that movement and load was not replaced. At best some yoga/ gentle aerobics was the exercise on offer, and this sedentary change in lifestyle occured around the time they'd passed their peak of bone density and muscle mass.

Few women go down the niche body building route of limited exercises with extreme weights and restricted diet/ suppliments. Most are building stronger bodies for functional health and that's great.