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AIBU?

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Original poster

Should I have said something to this mum?

161 replies

rocksonrocks · 20/06/2022 18:30

I was waiting for my husband in my car earlier when a woman pulled up next to me and got out of her car. As she walked away from her car she said "do not open the door or talk to anyone" and when I looked inside she had left her her daughter in her car seat whilst she went into the shop. It's really hot where I am and she didn't leave the window open, and the little girl can't have been older than two.

We left after about 5 minutes but it's been niggling me ever since. Should I have said something? WIBU if I did?

OP posts:
WhatTheHeckShrek · 20/06/2022 19:31

berksandbeyond · 20/06/2022 19:09

I would have gone into the supermarket and asked them to put out a tannoy announcement for the owner of vehicle with that reg, because she'd left her baby locked in a hot car. And yes I would confront someone over this, children have died from this?

This is a great idea!!

MakeMineALarge1 · 20/06/2022 19:34

@namechangeforprivacyxxx seriously, you need a wee so you take 3 children upstairs with you?
Bloody bonkers!
Pray tell what will happen if you didn't?
Mumsnet gets better every day!

SheWoreYellow · 20/06/2022 19:37

Hm, I think with it being a supermarket and a hot day I’d have gone into the supermarket and asked them to phone the police.

redbigbananafeet · 20/06/2022 19:46

SheWoreYellow · 20/06/2022 19:37

Hm, I think with it being a supermarket and a hot day I’d have gone into the supermarket and asked them to phone the police.

Why not use your mobile?

Flapjack637 · 20/06/2022 19:47

Ive called 999 about 2 children left in a hot car with no windows open. I had no idea how long the parent had been gone and the shop didn’t have a tannoy.

HandScreen · 20/06/2022 19:47

namechangeforprivacyxxx · 20/06/2022 18:44

This is awful who would leave their young child alone in a car?! I still take my three year old with me to the bathroom when I need a wee (our only toilet is upstairs)

Jesus, take a chill pill

tempester28 · 20/06/2022 19:48

I used to leave my children in the car whilst paying for petrol and occassionaly whilst parked directly outside a newsagent type shop where I could see them and was popping in for an item. Obviously things could happen, they get kidnapped, the car blows up ect ect. Mine have made it to the teenage years thankfully. I would not have left them in sainsburys car park and gone off to do shopping. You can only judge on the day really and of course leaving children in a hot car is a no no, but I feel unable to judge others unless I can see the full scenario for myself.

SW1amp · 20/06/2022 19:52

I think as PP said, if it was somewhere with line of sight, it would be different to a Tesco extra

But re the overheating thing…
My car will run the air con for up to 30 mins when the engine is off and car is locked, as will a lot of other cars (all electric and hybrid ones, because they can run the air con without needing an engine running)
So I wouldn’t automatically assume that dog or child inside a car on a hot day is in danger, if they are in a modern car…

DinoWoman · 20/06/2022 19:53

I wouldn't leave my 19 month old in a supermarket carpark but I would to go into a petrol station shop to pay, even if there is a queue. It does seem reckless.

NotLongNow12 · 20/06/2022 19:56

I know people are saying you're being a busy body and all that nonsense but I don't see it like that.
I think people need to step in sometimes.
It was really hot where I am today too. I was sat in the car with all 4 windows open and it was still too hot. Never mind with all windows closed!
I would have waited until the mum got back - she might have been 5 mins or so, but if it was longer, I would have gone into the shop to inform them of the registration and so they could ask the mum to come out to the child.
People might think I'm interfering with that, but I really don't care.

BrutusMcDogface · 20/06/2022 20:01

2 is far too young. I leave my 12, 10 and 8 year olds in the car if I’m only getting a few items. Not a weekly shop. I also would have hung around to wait for the mum to come back, and if I didn’t have time I would go in and report it to someone working in the shop.

namechangeforprivacyxxx · 20/06/2022 20:07

No my three year old I take with me not three kids 🤣 I take him because he still puts things in his mouth, climb's etc and both those things would take a second for him to really injure himself/choke etc

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 20/06/2022 20:08

Corner shop type place OK, large supermarket no. I'd have told customer service

Taking a 3 year old to the toilet with you when you are in your own home is absolutely bonkers!

Whiskeypowers · 20/06/2022 20:27

CarlCarlson · 20/06/2022 19:11

Another vote for busybody

She has nothing to do with you, keep your men out!

What a moronic post
nobody should ever leave their tiny child in a car unattended while they go into a supermarket. Add the hot weather into it it’s not just negligent it’s cruel

if the “mother” hasn’t reappeared with a trolley frankly I’d have gone in and informed customer service at the least

This isn’t being a busybody it just so safeguarding a child and people like you need to wake up

namechangeforprivacyxxx · 20/06/2022 20:44

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 20/06/2022 20:08

Corner shop type place OK, large supermarket no. I'd have told customer service

Taking a 3 year old to the toilet with you when you are in your own home is absolutely bonkers!

I'd never forgive myself if he choked on something whilst I was having a quick wee upstairs or tried to reach/climb on something and fell. He turned three this month and puts things in his mouth and climbs/constantly tests his limits.

It's absolutely bonkers that someone would leave a young child unattended in a car like wtf just take them with you it's not worth the risk

88milesanhour · 20/06/2022 20:45

Could the parent see the child at all times? I'm presuming not if it was a supermarket and if so then no it absolutely isn't acceptable and I would have taken the car details and reported to ss.

DawnTinsley · 20/06/2022 20:47

namechangeforprivacyxxx · 20/06/2022 18:44

This is awful who would leave their young child alone in a car?! I still take my three year old with me to the bathroom when I need a wee (our only toilet is upstairs)

Mate...... 😬

lunar1 · 20/06/2022 20:51

I would have gone into the shop and reported it, I've done it before, for both a child and a dog.

MadKittenWoman · 20/06/2022 20:58

namechangeforprivacyxxx · 20/06/2022 18:44

This is awful who would leave their young child alone in a car?! I still take my three year old with me to the bathroom when I need a wee (our only toilet is upstairs)

Really?!

Thebeastofsleep · 20/06/2022 20:59

namechangeforprivacyxxx · 20/06/2022 18:44

This is awful who would leave their young child alone in a car?! I still take my three year old with me to the bathroom when I need a wee (our only toilet is upstairs)

I do.

I leave them in the car to pick up younger child from nursery, get petrol, get cash from the ATM, collect items I'm buying off market place, get stuff from inside the house or pop to the loo.

But I also leave my 3yo downstairs playing whilst I do house work upstairs or get dressed. So I suspect we're wildly different parents.

Lookingforrecommendations · 20/06/2022 21:06

I tore a man a new arsehole in a carpark for leaving three distressed dogs in a car in the blistering heat, I think I'd actually be violent if I saw any one doing this to a baby, people are disgusting I can't get over anyone thinking this was ok

Geneviev · 20/06/2022 21:13

No I’ve never done this. I also only use pay at the pump to avoid this scenario.

i know a wee boy who was left in the car outside the nursery. He unclipped himself from his car seat, had a bit of a crawl around and released the handbrake. Car was embedded in another car when mum came back. Thankfully no one was hurt, but that has stayed with me (and my four year old would have absolutely no hesitation about getting out of her seat to have a play with the steering wheel)

Winter2019 · 20/06/2022 21:13

Hot or no hot I do think it's absolutely unacceptable! Just take your child with you. And I get this is highly unlikely to happen but what if something happened to mother in the shop,like she slipped, would've needed medical attention etc. How long would the child end up being alone?!! Far far too young.

Imo petrol station would be only acceptable place to leave child in a car only to pop in and pay!

whynotwhatknot · 20/06/2022 21:26

how does a barely 2 year old understand dont talk to anyone and dont move

and the fact its hot

some people should have kids

SinnermanGirl · 20/06/2022 21:46

Such a strange scenario. I don’t understand why the woman would have advertised her child neglect to you 🤔

To answer your question no I would not have said anything to the woman but I’d have called police given the temperature inside the car on a hot day.

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