Is your spouse your best friend?

[PashunFroot]

Just interested in how people view their partner. I see a quite a split in posts on this.
for example I see posts like; “my husband and I get along well, but we don’t have much in common and don’t really do anything together. However, he has a stable enough income and is a decent father so I married him.”

and on the opposite I see things like: “we do everything together, have the same sense of humour, laugh until we puke, he’s my best friend.”

Was just interested to see which was more common.

yanbu- he’s my best friend
yabu- he’s not my best friend

(Invisibly change pronouns if you’re in same sex relationship, are a man etc)

Yes my OH is my best friend...can't even imagine life without him

Sorry that just doesn’t make sense to me.

maybe that’s where the divide is then, how people view friendships and relationships.

He’s certainly one of my best friends, but I have others too who are equally as important to me.

No.

He's my husband.

My best friend is my best friend.

They both fulfil very different roles.

Yes and no. DH is my best friend, but I also have a separate (female) best friend. If someone asked me what my best friend's name was, I'd probably say her. But then I'd probably mention DH as well!

The three of us have known each other a long time, though, and are close as a group. Lots of in jokes and shared hobbies, etc.

He definitely is my best friend. Don’t know if it’s a bad thing or good thing but we are very happy.

well he's the only person I can be 100% and I mean 100% myself with. There is no one else I could do that with.

Friend defn: "a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relations.*
I mean it can't be that hard to think this dictionary definition is also how lots of people do actually define friendship

I would describe him as my soul mate, it's a soul connection. When I met him, I felt like I already knew him, and I've never had such an overwhelmingly familiar experience with anyone else. I don't think I have a best friend. I have a number of close friends and I talk to them about different things at different times.

Yes, he’s my best friend but I have other best friends as well, that I need in different ways.

Yes he is, we do most things together. We do have our own social groups and he has a few hobbies I have no interest in.

I don't understand marriages/long term relationships that aren't based on a friendship; what holds it all together when you go through rough patches physically and romantically?

Our love for each other, our love for the family we've made and our faith.

Yes 100%, we obviously have our own sets of friends and we don't spend every waking minute together and still do separate things but yeah he is

100%. He is the only person in the world who I know without a shadow of a doubt that loves me totally, unconditionally and always has my back. He loves me more than either of my parents do, or any of my children.

He's fabulous and definitely my best friend.

We are definitely best friends. He’s the one person I can rely on not to let me down and to put me first. We are quite co dependant but we are identically so, and it just works. We don’t like being apart and chose to do stuff together over any one else. We don’t argue or get shitty with each other. I’m his biggest fan and he is mine.

Same . Friend doesn't quite cut it. Its a completely different much deeper relationship than friendship

No. I like him. And we have fun together. I also love him and respect him. But he's not a best mate.

I asked DH who his best friend was and he did say me so I feel better about saying in here he isn't 😂😂. To counter the "what gets you through if not friendship" I'd say that the commitment we have outside of what I'd have I na friendship in what gets us through when shared interests, sense of humour etc, affection isn't enough. We've weathered a disabled baby that kept nearly dying and twins during a pandemic, we needed more than friendship for that.

Same here @bloodywhitecat and it is so, so hard.😥

”laugh until we puke” 😂😂 that made me laugh.
I do consider my partner my best friend. Sometimes he’s the only person I have. I can tell him anything.

Absolutely not.

A bit like ATAT - like saying your mum is your best friend. Very weird.

Different. I have never fucked my friends.

Your partner isn't a 'friend'. If they were they'd be your 'friend'

I thought he was until four years ago when I discovered he betrayed me in the worst way possible. I no longer trust anyone or even myself.

We reside in the same home but live separate lives. I honestly never saw this coming.

Envious of those of you who know your dh has your back 100%, that if you were being attacked, he would push you behind him and face the attackers head on. It brings one great comfort and security which women need.

Yes he is. Its just a really natural relationship, he's easy to talk to, makes me feel confident and just raises me up. He's an extrovert, I'm an introvert but we just make each other laugh and support each other.

100% my best friend, we both have other friends and interests, me moreso than him.