Everyone looks so happy

[Eightieskidninetiesteen]

And I’m happy for them.

So many people seem to have so much going on, lots of money, exciting outings etc.
I have a nice life and a Dd I adore, but I don’t feel like this.
Hard to explain, but looking at sm before never made me feel the way it is lately

Anyone else feel the same?

People lie and exaggerate on social media. Generally the more they post, the more insecure they really are.

Social media? Well, they're not going to document their arguments and boring days of housework, and display it for the world to see are they?

Social media posts do not reflect reality. They reflect people’s preferred representations of themselves.

I feel like this too, but nobody posts the truth on social media. Everyone has shit going on.

But it’s reality when they’re wearing beautiful clothes and out at lovely places with hundreds of friends…the pics/videos are there to be seen.

I look happy, if you saw me in the street you would probably assume I am but you'd be wrong. DH died in February and inside I am just about clinging on but I do a good impression of getting on with things.

You never truly know what is going on in someone's life.

My friend tagged me in a theatre trip tonight. A cancellation from prepandemic.

In reality I have a lot going on with dd self harm and anxiety, have debt from renovating my house, my job is stressful and I have put on 3 stone and worse.

Don't get hung up on social media.

@bloodywhitecat I’m so so sorry 😞 💐

I agree with PPs. I don;t do Sm much but if I did, I could absolutely rule it with frequent theatre trips, gigs, gorgeous walks in nature, apparent endless trips to a beautiful part of UK. In reality my work had nose dived post pandemic, the gorgeous UK trips are due to sorting out the estate of a very ill relative and in between lovely gigs etc I battle anxiety, depression and weight gain, But if I did SM, I could make my life look enviable.

As others are pointing out, social media is like a fraud. So many 'friends', but not friends. People only post positive images - not routine boring stuff or shitty events. Don't be deceived.

I post pictures/videos (not on a lot) on Instagram. I have to say, I am genuinely happy in that moment but you can't always be happy.

What PP have said re social media. I remember my ex roommate used to cry loudly in her room whilst posting glamorous pictures of her in parties/ various holiday destinations. She had everything on paper but she was always so sad when she came home

I was listening to something on the radio the other day where they were saying that IRL you have a small circle of people you know and major and exciting life events happen occasionally. On social media or in a wider social circle the law of averages says that there'll always be someone doing something exciting like buying a house or having baby which makes it seem like 'everyone else' is having a more exciting time. Individually the people aren't all all doing these things all the time. With social media you are comparing yourself with the whole world.

My life looks perfect on Facebook. It looks like all I do is sit around playing games and crafting with the kids and going on adventures.
Reality is I suffer with psychotic depression, fibromyalgia, hEDS, arthritis, autism, anxiety and PTSD.
My life is miserable. I spend every second in excruciating pain, I have frequent dislocations and subluxations, I struggle with basic self care, I hear voices, I hallucinate, I'm paranoid and have to check my doors are locked 11 times before I can settle and go to bed, I have flashbacks to the traumatic event that triggered my PTSD and I want to kill myself on a regular basis.
But I don't post that. I post the happy times.

@HerRoyalHappiness So sorry 😞

You see a snapshot of someone’s life on SM, not the reality. I do lots with my family and post pictures of days out where I’m smiling. I don’t post the fact that I cry daily because I’m grieving and really sad.

Why is it then that some people are so desperate to post that everything’s perfect? I get it, most don’t post the hard times, me included. But why do so many have to prove to others that they’re happy, especially if they’re not? (Realise that many who post *are happy when they post)

One of my favourite insta pages I follow likes to remind us frequently that "social media is a highlight reel, not real everyday life" and it really hit home for me.

I'm not one to post on social media and I've always been a bit of a sceptic when it comes to what others post. However, it didn't stop me feeling wholly inadequate on the lead up to my DD's first birthday last year. The reality however, was that we had a great day on her birthday and it wasn't marred by me forcing her to pose for loads of photos for social media.

I tend to find people share the worst of times and the best of times on social media. There's a complete lack of average, relatable to the vast majority, of times (unless you look back to 2007/2008 where everyone was keen to share they'd had a cracking Bolognese for dinner 😂).

My dh died last year, it’s coming up for the one year anniversary next month, my 1st wedding anniversary is at the end of this month, we were married for only 8 days.

my social media is quite upbeat, very few negative posts, maybe to those who don’t know me well might think I’m over it all.

couldn’t be further from the truth, I’ve been really poorly this past year, my 15 year old daughter won’t go to school, my eldest daughter has had a mental breakdown and is I’ll, my mum is being tested for oesophageal cancer and I’m just fucking tired of it all.

people always post the good stuff on social media, it’s not real life

I wouldn't fall for everything that you see on social media. Even if their lives look all exciting and amazing, it doesn't mean that they are happy.

I can't even tell you the amount of people on my Facebook who have had these massive lavish weddings abroad, post about their brand new house, good jobs, a kid..and within a few months of getting married they have split up and are getting divorced. I can think of 3 on my Facebook alone! But with all the pics of them constantly kissing, always writing how much they love each other etc you would think they had found their soul mate, then the next day it's over and they hate each other!

Don't pay too much attention to it!

Yes, earlier this year social media started to
make me feel this way, and it never had before.

ln this scenario, it’s one of the few times I think avoidance is the best solution. I just deactivated FB. I stay on Twitter but anonymously and just to browse my favourite sports feeds.

I post on Instagram or Instagram stories about once a month on average.

It's either a family outing, something nice that me and DH did or something fun with a friend I haven't seen for a while. If you scrolled through my profile (it's private though) you'd think my life was packed, but it's about once in every 30 days!

Heres a good example of shit sm is. My friend told me she had a crap time at a particular event, how it took ages to get there, cost loads etc, dcs were miserable. Yet later , there it was, a set of photos with smiley faces saying how fantastic the day had been. Nuff said.
If they're having such a good time then why spend it taking so many photos?
OP, its all false but I can understand how you feel because before the above incident I felt the same. Then I gave my head a wobble. You ever know whats going on behind closed doors. There are lots of people with a public persona. The best thing is not to look at sm/f.book etc. Or to take it all with a pinch of salt.

Echoing others in that SM is a sanitised version of most people's lives, highlighting the very best parts. Most people would not post about the worst things they are having to deal with on a daily basis (unless they love posting their 'warts and all')

@Immaterialatthispoint It started around then for me too, so weird. I used to love Instagram, now I’m fed up of the stories etc. Fb is quite boring and I mainly use it for messaging friends etc, but I’ve had these for years and fairly recently I’ve really started to question it all