To think to hell with this life!! I’m done!!

[Remiwoof2]

I’m sorry if I sound unreasonable but I am just honestly wanting to run away to a hotel and call it on today!! Actually not even the whole day but my evening time.

Thursdays have been promised to me as an evening of relaxation and no commitments! So this is week 2 and this evening I’ve had 4 projectile vomits from the 2 year old and because he’d thrown up in his bed other half moved him to ours which has a new simba mattress and a gorgeous soft duvet which he has now thrown up on 2 under sheets so I’m sleeping on a blanket with no duvet now.

he went back to his own bed after throwing up on ours twice and he’s thrown up on that one again so the 2 year old is down to his last sheet. My other half cannot tell the puppy to be quietly properly and after a big moth got in the room I had to remove it.

this is all during the worst temperature ever! I hate summer! I hate this evening and I am so sick of my wet blanket fiancée and the stupid stupid false promises of being able to relax!! I feel like the only way I’m ever going to get chance to relax properly is if I run away or I die 🤷🏼‍♀️😡

Forgot to mention that during all this the cat decided to urinate on the sofa even though she’s got a clean litter tray! Honestly it is like everyone in the house was playing Russian roulette of who can stress mum out the most 😩

I've said it before on here, but my retirement plans feature neither kids nor pets!
Poor you - that does totally suck

Well on the plus side, tomorrow can't be any worse and the bedding will dry very quickly in this weather...

You'll laugh about this one day. Maybe not for a few years though!!

Why was your OH not able to manage for the evening?

While it sucks surely you realise with a kid being that ill it's better for you and your fiance to work as a team tonight and you get your night off when the toddler is better.

I'd put puppy pads under the two year old. When your children are so young there's no such thing as guaranteed relaxation, unfortunately.

I’m not unsympathetic.

But a puking child is an all hands on deck situation, IMO.

I think, if my partner had an evening off agreed, I would call them in that situation. It’s not exactly a run of the mill bedtime. I’d absolutely expect them to take it another time and it sucks that their evening got ruined, but a partnership has to step up when the sick hits the fan.

it’s completely reasonable to expect a regular night off-call. Keep trying OP. It’ll get better if you stick at it. (Book a night in a hotel next time though!)

It’s really hard and stressful, but…you’re 2 year old sounds really quite sick 🤷🏻‍♀️

*Your

Did your OH try to do anything useful, or did he make it all your problem?

I'll admit, me, camera, tablet and unlimited travel funds account, I could travel for years, and I'd love it all, well most of it.

I think it’s just a sympathy situation vs a ‘surely you realise’ situation.

Sorry OP, that sounds completely shit.

It’s crap but I would have expected us both to sort it together. Sadly illness would mean cancelling my night off.

How rude of your toddler to get sick when you want to relax….. 🙄

@PlantSpider has it absolutely right. Unfortunately the bloody perfect percy brigade arrived.
@Remiwoof2 you're not unreasonable at all to he totally pissed off. I've felt like running off to a hotel many a time. Maybe you should take a night off away from the house if you can?
I'm sure you realise puking toddler is just crappy timing and maybe you can try for a relax when they're feeling better.

Agree with PP that puking is all hands on deck.

The main question is what happens on all the other nights aside from Thursdays?

In our house we tackle the evening routine together. One cooks, one juggles kids, someone washes up whilst the other does bathtime, tidying up happens whilst kids are being settled to bed. One person takes DS and the other takes DD and we stay until they’re asleep. Both usually downstairs by 7.30 and relaxing by 8ish for a couple of hours. I’d be hugely pissed off if I was doing it all whilst the other person relaxed! I’m on maternity leave and that is still considered to be ‘my job’ which means we are both entitled to down time when the working day ends.

If you don’t have puppy pads, use towels. The vomit does not soak through and you can just sling them in the wash.

Hope your partner is contributing as well - if he is finding it tough tell him he needs more practice.

my other half has a side business along with his day job so he works in his studio from 5:30PM until about 9 or 10PM Monday, Tuesday, Thursday after he puts the kids down though and the new plan is that I go off and do my own thing and then he works Friday evening too. He then wants to fit in 4 hours over the weekend.

this side business is also his hobby and one of which he really loves so he isn’t forced into doing that and he keeps all the money from that himself. That means I’m putting the children to bed rest of time. He just tends to pick them up so I cook their dinner etc.

That’s for the posters asking what happens on the other evenings.. I think I was more annoyed that this happened on the one night I was promised a stress free evening.. of course I don’t begrudge my child being sick and my pets being slightly more annoying than usual. Our puppy probably picked up that something was wrong upstairs. He adores our 2 year old

I completely get it. I am a teacher so don’t get days off when my kids are at school (I’m aware I’m very lucky with how much time off I get but I never have any child free time). My school do a few unpaid twilights that work out as an extra day. We get to take that day in lieu when we like which is amazing. I took mine and DH took a day holiday and we planned to do absolutely nothing but sit around and watch films and eat in peace.

My DM, who looks after DD2, said she was ill so couldn’t have her. 😩 It’s not like holiday where I could just rearrange it. My day of peace was gone. I know it’s not her fault but I did cry.

OP, it’s a shame that the time your DC was ill was on your promised evening off. I’d be arguing that your OH’s side hustle is very selfish because it adds massively to your work and you’re not getting any benefit from it if he keeps all the money. He should be doing it when DC has gone to bed and all other household tasks are done.

So three nights a week he disappears for 3 1/2 - 4 1/2 hours for him time, which gives no benefit to the family as he keeps the money for himself?

What a prince.

This has been my life lately... Planning to have a half day alone in the house and then... School is closed, DCs are sick, DSCs have to come over, partner decides to work from home, plumber visit, dentist appointment... Yes it's all just life and the world doesn't stop turning etc etc. But when you really looked forward to having some precious quiet time alone it's really devastating!

Sounds about standard for parenting toddlers it can be shit sometimes and sort of unbelievably grim when they are ill. I don’t know how you manage to have loads of pets while having a young child , you have practically guaranteed yourself no relaxation time ever .