To think class parents need to do more?

[annoyedatotherparents]

Probably will get told that people have their own lives, everyone's busy, etc etc.

But am seriously annoyed today. I've done two years of being a class rep at my DS's school. Primary aged kids, but pretty minimal work - organising vouchers for teachers at Christmas, occasional presents for class mums who've had babies, organising volunteer rotas for two fairs a year (Xmas and summer). The kids are getting older so there's minimal reminders needed and everyone knows everyone else now so fewer social things - people just hang out in the groups they like. So all pretty easy.

I asked around today as the usual pattern is for people to do two years as class rep then hand over to someone else. The class WhatsApp was totally silent...tumbleweed. Everyone appears to be utilising the Mumsnet maxim of no being a complete sentence. However....this will mean I end up getting saddled with it all again. And I have 3DC and a full time job. There are plenty of mums in the class with one child and no job. (Rich enough husbands to not need to work).

I guess my AIBU is - would I BU to just tell everyone I'm drawing names out of a hat? The competitive busyness thing is ridiculous and I'm sure everyone will have a tantrum if I do that but the alternative is me just putting up with it and that will drive me mad!

There has never been a class rep at any school I have worked at. There isn't one at my grandchildren's schools. It isn't as important a job as you seem to think it is. It doesn't matter.

Yess! Less faffy nonsense and more assistance pandas.

Hah! Good luck with that op - I have had similar messages and there is no way I have the time to take it on, ditto everyone else.

Class rep? Is this another one of those middle class things?

We have class reps (state school), 2 per class so the load is shared, who are members of the PTA to varying levels of involvement. Ours do the Christmas and end of year teacher present collections (obviously not compulsory!), and recruit the helpers for the fairs, pass on messages from the PTA and also post reminders on WhatsApp (ie today is a mufti day or today is book swap day etc). It’s the people who like organising etc who volunteer. I could see how it’s annoying if it’s just you and no bugger else is volunteering! No recruitment suggestions though!

Never had a class rep at DD’s primary. I’d just say I’m stopping being class rep end of this term. Silence could mean they don’t want a class rep or they don’t want to volunteer.
Everyone can sort own presents if they want.

You made the mistake of posting a plea on WA, the real professionals wait until a mother is hanging by a thread with three rowdy children screaming and hanging on, she is hollow eyed and monosyllabic before ambushing her at 0855 on a Monday morning therefore guaranteeing a replacement by default.

You need to up your game op!!

So it’s an independent school… so you pay for your dc to go there then get given a job to do for free? Madness. I helped at our school disco for 2 hours last week and that’s it for the year. I work full time and so does dh. I was a school governor for 4 years but was working part time back then.

Is it a private school thing?
Our school where I teach has class reps. They are very useful.
But you are able to just give up if it has got too much.

I am now feeling a bit disgruntled that no-one organised a present for me when I had DS2!

We have class reps. They mainly filter comments back to the school. No organising of gifts for anyone (even teachers) that I am aware of.

The busiest working parents are the same ones who agree to go along for school swimming because no one else will (knowing it gets cancelled if there are no volunteers), while the SAHP stay silent. It's the busiest parents who agree to be governors. Who fill in to play piano for the musical when the music teacher gets Covid. Who find time to get into school on special occasions to tell the children about their religion. Etc etc.

I’ve noticed this too. And I just don’t get it. I’ve made a different set of choices for my own life (fine for me - no judgement of anyone else’s). But I genuinely don’t understand why, if you’re strapped for time and using childcare in the school holidays, you’d want to take a day off to go and watch school swimming or go and volunteer at school. I’m up and down to school all the time. I think the “come and watch swimming”/watch the children opening an envelope is ludicrous. I don’t want to watch it. I don’t want to encourage them to ask us to come and watch it. I want them to spend their time teaching the kids and focusing on them - and not putting on events for the parents. (My kids think it’s hilarious as they hate these events too, by the way!) Do things if you want to do them and you think they’re worthwhile. But don’t try to manage others who may have different views from you.

I don't think anyone on this thread is going to be very sympathetic to pregnant mums who can afford private school fees for their children not getting gifts from the families of their children's classmates. 🙄😂

Honestly. Very, very first world problem... not that it's even a problem!

I have never heard of such a thing. Just don’t do it

At DT’s school (private) there were no class reps or WhatsAp groups - everything worked fins. never heard of class mums getting a present. I rarely met the other parents so would have no idea who was pregnant!

It’s prob the 2yrs that’s puts people off

a term is fair /easy

but yes no real need for a class rep

we have a wats app group fir our class reception. As do all other classes

we all remind each other of things whether pe day has changed or special menu for lunch

and general chit chat

but no one is in charge of it

It's very common in international and independent schools. Class rep organises get together for new parents in September (always loads of them in international schools), organises gifts and sometimes joins focus/steering groups.

We have them (state primary) and I’ve avoided for a decade because I completely disagree with this forced volunteering BS. I’d pay them £100 to leave me the f alone.

Me neither. I was going to join about 5 years ago but two of the mums had a massive barney on whatsapp to the extent that the HT got involved and told them to grow the fuck up.

Still, slightly better than at my DSis;s school (She is the Head) where two parents literally came to blows.

FFS. Drop kids off. Smile nicely to everyone. Pick up. The end.

@WimpoleHat my employer allowed me to have 6 days per year for governor work (I never used that much but maybe 2 days a year).

I think you’re getting a bit of a rough time here, OP. I get your point. It’s less about the role and more about the fact that it seems sometimes like people enjoy benefiting from events and resources for the kids yet aren’t willing to chip in to help make it happen. (PTA, etc)

fWIW, we have a class rep too (state primary) and a few people have volunteered over the years.

My advice is to remove the emotion from a practical problem. No one is obliged to take on a voluntary role, but if your question was ‘am I allowed to be quietly pissed off at the lack of team players’ then I think YANBU, but know a lot will disagree.

However, you can know you did a nice thing for two years, calmly inform everyone that you are not longer class rep, and que sera, sera 🤷🏼‍♀️

First I've ever heard of a class rep!! Is it even necessary?

just don't do it!

"Pregnant people" gets a hmm emoji but "preggoes" is cool?

The busiest working parents are the same ones who agree to go along for school swimming because no one else will (knowing it gets cancelled if there are no volunteers), while the SAHP stay silent

Maybe the SAHPs have babies or toddlers to look after. Or there is another reason why they don't work. I always gone back to work after babies but I have more free time on my hands as a working parent than I did on maternity leave. It's easier for me to volunteer to help on a school trip or run a stall at the school fete for half an hour because I can just take it as part of my lunch break or make the time up another day. Meanwhile my children are in school/childcare. I wouldn't have been much help when I wasn't working as I would have been preoccupied with a baby

The OP was making a lighthearted quip. Relax.