‘Telling off’ from a teacher?

[Thistledew]

DS is in year 1.
Summer born so not yet 6yrs old. He is being investigated for potential ADHD.

He was the last one out of the classroom and then had to go back in because he had forgotten his water bottle. His teacher stopped him as he was finally coming out and told him that if he had been paying more attention and not messing around then he could have been out of the classroom much earlier.

Would you think the teacher was being unfair and could have approached the situation in a way to better help DS learn?

Get a grip OP.

My exact point is we are educational experts, not medical experts, yet are frequently expected to know more than doctors about conditions when that knowledge doesn’t really help in an educational setting at all.

and that nobody is Lilly to ever be satisfied about what a teacher knows or understands about a condition, and it is very common for one expert to berate us an understanding of a condition that has come from a different ‘expert’ ’ ir alternative training.

hence why many LAs are moving g away from diagnosis altogether. Because it is far more important to know the child rather than ‘facts’ about the child’s diagnosed condition

and I don’t know how you jumped from that to the assumption that I am ignorant or damaging, except by automatic prejudice or ignorance.

30 years experience, and overwhelmingly positive relationships and successfully outcomes. Must be doing something right!

and back to the OP. I expect the teachers response was the right one. The teacher knows the child and we dont

@12Thorns you've summed up my point then haven't you. Clueless and couldn't care less. Lovely teacher you sound. Yes of course I will advocate for my child and try and raise awareness wouldn't you ??

Teacher sounds fine to me, it’s nearing the end of the academic year, children should know the routine of what they need to collect at the end of the day by now and if he was messing around and therefore not doing what he needs to be doing, he should have that spelt out to him.

@ChocolatemilkBertie 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

ADHD isn't a get out of jail free card to excuse everything . All kids mess about and misbehaviour including ones with ADHD.

I agree with this, there's a stark difference between saying this once or occasionally and if the teacher were to be saying it daily without thinking oh this is an ongoing thing perhaps we should look to figure out a way to help. There's no indication from OP that the letter is the case. Just as its detrimental to wear away at a child with ASD by applying societal expectations that don't apply; its also the case to have low expectations ie if the child usually completes the task without issue, to not comment when they don't. I was diagnosed with ADHD later in life and there were many things I struggled with, there were things that others with it did and I didn't. Everyone is different and the teacher will know the child.

Not remotely clueless, and yes I am a lovely teacher, even after decades of abuse from ignorant parents like you.

and if you ‘advocate’ for your child while your child is in my class, which you might have done for all either of us know, I would be delighted to hear from you and engage in a constructive conversation with you if that’s what you are open too. And most parents are

however some parents are less constructive, Unrealistic about what a teacher can offer, blind to their children’s poor behaviour, entitled in their demands and expectations and basically want the school and everyone else’s children to revolve around their offspring.

I am much less delighted to have my time wasted by this type of parent, but for the sake of the child, will still try to build positive relationships, without compromising the basic principles of fairness

in this case, the parent of a child who does not even have an adhd diagnosis is complaining that a teacher gently reprimanded him for messing around, when he had been messing around, and the teacher clearly recognised that he is capable of making the choice NOT to in that situation

this appears to be likely to be the second type of parent, and my sympathy is very much with the teacher

I think it's a non-issue OP.

When I read the title of the thread I thought you were going to be the one told off - eg "you should teach your son to be more organised so he remembers his water bottle".

@SurfBox sounds like it was a good choice for you to leave teaching.

@IDreamOfTheMoors you knew your mum for 96 years fucking hell are you Connor McLoud?

@Veol my nephew is a Teacher and he has ADHD, his parents still wont accept it "as everyone knows it's just a naughty boy thing". He said it was teaching children with SEN that made him realise that he does in fact have ADHD he said it was a revelation and a relief.

Are you serious OP? So the teacher is not permitted to correct your child at all???? How on earth is she/he a teacher then?