To think this was ridiculous?

[SnakeyCakey]

Went to a cafe yesterday with my friend and my 13 month old baby.

Myself and my friend ordered food and drinks however my son is pretty fussy so he'll only have certain things. Every time we go out I take a small lunch box of the easy things he'll eat, yesterday I took a small wrap, cheese, chicken, some cucumber sticks and a banana.

Anyway, long and short of it is an employee wouldn't allow me to feed my son his packed lunch as they didn't allow people's own food in the cafe.

If we'd all wacked out a picnic I could understand but my friend and I were having food and drink purchased from there. Tried to explain the situation but he was having none of it so we had to quickly eat what we could and leave as my son was getting upset that there was no food for him.

AIBU to think this is complete overkill and to complain?

That's about as relevant as if they ate lobster thermidor at that age though isn't it? I've already explained why he's not the easiest and he's being seen by the GP about it. Because your child would eat X Y or Z doesn't really help me.

I think the problem is they need to have a policy or some people will take the piss.
You can bring food for a baby - how old is a baby?
Under 1 - my child is 13 months so that’s not fair
Just a snack - what constitutes a snack?
If the adults are buying food - to what value?

I've never been to a cafe where it's an option to just purchase some cucumber sticks and grated cheese / few slices of chicken on a plate no.

As someone with a child who had ARFID most cafes can offer something once you explain/ask

If you'd asked if they could cater for what your son would eat and they said no, then I don't think you'd be unreasonable, most cafés would have those things you brought and could have given him what you did though, or you could have at least asked before you gave it to him.

They'll have this policy for a reason, and as it's their business, they're allowed to make policies that work for them, and expect their staff to keep to them, doing so doesn't make someone a jobsworth.

And I'm not sure that recommendations based on allowing people to bring their own food is best for a business that relies on selling the food they offer food to be consumed in their premises?

YNBU.
I could understand the reaction if you and your friend whipped out a packed lunch each and only bought drinks, but you were buying.
Ridiculous.

I think once past the baby jars/weaning food, you don't take a meal for a child into a cafe/restaurant

this. But then our local cafe would make up a plate of finger food for both my children at that age - cut up soft buttered bread slices, cut up banana and cucumber sticks, bits of roast chicken. They only charged 4£ for the plate which I thought was lovely too. I do suspect lots of places would be happy to do that if you’re a regular. They have the ingredients. I don’t think you can just take your own food in, but you don’t think you’re being unreasonable so why ask?

I've never been to a cafe where it's an option to just purchase some cucumber sticks and grated cheese / few slices of chicken on a plate no

but did you ask them?

I personally think, if your 13 month old won't eat anything from the menu then feed him before you go and then bring as someone else says some snacks or purchase something off the menu.

I was a bit like this a 2 years. DP's took me on my first holiday to Greece and apparently all I'd eat was Greek yogurt and those honey balls. Nothing else!

Generally you just ask and they will make a plate up. I’m guessing you didn’t?

im not sure what’s going on, it’s like aibu, yes, am I fuck

Apologies if you've said OP but did you ask owners of cafe if you could serve your son your own food or did you just bring it out and serve it?

He’s still a baby, I did the same.

Keep offering him other foods but without pressure. He may come around in time. Hopefully you’ll be able to broaden out the diet as he gets older.

How would the cafe owner even know? Order food and drink for you and your friend, find a table, wait for the food to be served, then take out food for your ds.

Cafe owner is a bit short sighted as he’s lost 2 paying customers. A baby in a high chair doesn’t take up much table space, he can sit at the end of a 2 person table.

I would have thought that most places would make an exception for a baby, but they don't have to.

@Boredsoentertainme

im not sure what’s going on, it’s like aibu, yes, am I fuck

this made me laugh

I think YABU. The cafe can chose its own policies. And that does sound like a picnic. Babies are very messy so the staff would need to do extra cleaning.

Personally given that you had bothbought food and drink I wouldn't have an issue at all-now the chances are they've list a customer through a bit of pettiness.

Well actually maybe they did prefer your son to not eat in the cafe as that involves them having to clean up after him when they were not paid for the food. Extrapolate that to the big picture, that they had lots of people come in and eat their own food and they then have to clear up after.

Do you not understand about bigger pictures and policies? You are just looking at it from the perspective of one child, but you are not their only customer. As well as the cafe are not earning money (and in fact are losing money) by clearing up after a trail of people bringing in their own food, a standard no bringing in your own food policy might be much easier for the cafe to implement. Otherwise it is a case of each case on its own merits which the staff have to try and judge and implement and no doubt get into unproductive debates with customers over.

It really is quite reasonable for a cafe to have a policy of not permitting people to consume packed lunches on their premises. Really surprised you can’t see this and you have a very selfish attitude if you can’t.

The cafe was being ridiculous, some people have no mental capacity to work out the difference between 10 adults taking a three course picnic into the cafe and a small child who will eat one bite of this and half a handful of that. YANBU

You say you bought 2 meals and drinks.

And your son is 13 months....

They're jokers. Go somewhere else.

And no every cafe doesn't have food on tap for a fussy one year old. Especially if you have to wait for them to bring it.

Yanbu. I have a 13 month old with a dairy & soya allergy so I usually do take food for him as I can't guarantee there will be food he can eat (eg bread usually contains soya and/or dairy). If you're questioned again I'd just say he has a allergy.

I don't really see the problem as you were ordering anyway, also don't understand the people who are saying you took a whole packed lunch. He's 13 months?! He won't eat that much. Or the people who say you should have fed him first. I don't know your baby, but mine will eat his food and if we're eating around him after he'll cry for ours too!

It’s a fairly common policy because most people take the mick with it, before you no it the child is 3 or 4 with a full pack lunch in there, then 5 or 6. And someone walks in with a 3 year old while your kid is eating their own pack lunch and the staff end up arguing with someone else about it. Also 9 out of 10 don’t actually clean up after their babies and it gets left for the staff.

If there are so many lovely cafes around you then why not find one that’s suitable for your child to eat in? Or just accept some businesses won’t allow toddler picnics and be a bit less entitled about it. You choose to go to somewhere that can’t feed your child, you run the risk of them asking you not to bring your own stuff. I’m sure plenty of cafes will allow it or will be able to whip up something suitable when you ask.

Having allergies and food intolerances are completely different though.

There's no reason why the OP couldn't have asked them to make something?

I think if he'd been older say 2 or 3 I see the cafes point of view however at 13 months he's only been eating for a few months. Think like some one else said I'd be wary of added salt/sugar at that age anyway. Seems reasonable to bring him his own little bits to eat at that age

I think they were BU. It's not like he was five years old and you racked up with a picnic and bought nothing. A lot of babies and toddlers would not be able to eat anything on offer in a cafe. Though it's up to them to decide what their rules are, I'd be leaving them an unfavourable review and would be recommending to other parents of babies that they avoid it.