Toddler overdose

[tripledose]

What would you do in this scenario?

I left DH alone with DD, who is two, for the long weekend to see friends. I take one weekend off a year.

While I was away she came down with a fever and he gave her TRIPLE the dose of paracetomol every 6 hours for all of the three days. I asked him have you double and triple checked the dosage and he said yes yes. I didn't want to second guess him even though I was worried because we have had arguments in the past about me double checking what he says/researches when DD is ill - he says it shows I don't trust him and I am too controlling.

We have spent the day in hospital because I came back to him giving this dosage and was worried about liver damage. Thankfully she is ok but I am furious with him and was out of my mind with worry that DD would suffer permanent damage in some way.

He's pretty competent on the whole but I feel he let his pride and ego get in the way here and risked DD's health as a result.

What do I do? I am so angry.

I'm quite surprised safeguarding haven't been involved. A call from childrens social care might knock some sense into him.

Not the same, but I'm always alarmed at the amount of baby deaths due to 'SIDS' where the child is in the fathers care. Generally it's not true SIDS, but cases where overlaying/unsafe sleep environments are the cause of death. It's often dads. I will note this is anecdotal, what I've observed over the years working with children and families. I'd be interested to know if there's any stats/research on this.

Patronising as well as giving terrible advice. Brilliant.

Looking up the dose for the wrong medication isn't exactly double and triple checking. Surely part of checking is checking you're looking at the right medicine!

While I think you have a point, I also think this could be a communication issue more than ego.

If they have got into a pattern where OP constantly goes on at him because he made a mistake once (which may well have been no worse than mistakes OP has made) then that will most likely either lead to him pushing back in order to try to re-establish boundaries, or taking a big step back and not playing an equal role in the relationship. Both of which are likely to lead to a very unhappy marriage.

It may be that what needs to happen (if OP can forgive him) is marriage counselling with an emphasis on communication and rebuilding trust.

A friend died due to accidental paracetamol overdose. Adult taking paracetamol and having lemsip type hot drinks. Wasn't even a vast amount over the doses but She died a nasty death.

Just because you can buy it for 15p in the supermarket doesn't mean it's harmless.

I think we need better public information about how paracetamol works. I take maximum 30/500 cocodamol (8 capsules per day) on prescription, and so maximum paracetamol as part of that and it’s never been adequately explained to me why long term use isn’t problematic. If I ask they say “it’s fine” quite airily. Maybe we should have the mechanism explained to us more specifically.

OP you’re completely within your rights to be absolutely furious. If you decide you want to stay in the relationship, I think you should probably consider marriage counselling to try to rebuild trust (as PPs have also said).

On a different note, wow, I had no idea paracetamol was so easy to overdose on/sodangerous! I’m going to be much more careful how I use it from now on. We should have better education on this or something — maybe in PHSE?

Was he trying to help her fall asleep? Some people wrongly assume that some cold medicines have some magical stuff that helps children to sleep better.

paracetamol is so widely used that some people can’t imagine how dangerous an overdose is.

Accidents happen. You clearly don't trust him so the question is what would it take to trust him?

My toddler ate a bunch of iron filled multivitamins. I left the (child locked!!) bottle up high on a shelf. Unbeknownst to me, he climbed up during the night, somehow took the lid off, and ate enough to make himself throw up. The next morning I found the vomit in his bed with the open bottle. I called poison control. I dug through the vomit and counted the complete pills and made sure to tell poison control exactly how many he could have possibly had. This was at least 2 years ago and I still feel extreme guilt about it. We don't buy those pills anymore.

In my mind it's all about how you react, as the at fault person.

It sounds like you infantalise him a bit. So perhaps you should work on building his competence and your trust.

Honestly I would have gone mental if this had happened to me. I certainly would not be leaving him to responsible for the child again because he is clearly just too stupid or doesn't care. After the situation and then he didn't call you back in room when the Dr arrived as you requested, who does that! personally I would have told him to pack his stuff once I got home.this is clear negligence and could have ended so very badly. Triple the dose, every 6 hours for days?! I still can't get my head around that! I read the packet everytime just to be sure and double check my self.

Eating 1 paracetamol is very different from triple the dose every 6 hours for several days.prolonged over use could effect liver and kidneys.

Why did he not just read the instructions. ? X

What an absolute idiot. It is unforgivable the danger he exposed his child to. You have to be extremely careful with paracetamol. Not only the dose but the amount of doses you have in 24 hours. The child could have died. If she needed more then it is well known to take ibuprofen.

This relationship sounds doomed. From both sides...

The hospital would have been able to measure her acetaminophen / paracetamol levels to see how elevated they were. That would tell them if there was an overdose and to what degree. They would have kept her in hospital for awhile to keep measuring her levels as they can continue to rise after the person stops taking the acetaminophen. If they had concerns about her levels, they would give an antidote (acetylcysteine) to reduce possible damage to the liver.

Most hospitals have very clear and set protocols for management of acetaminophen / paracetamol poisoning and overdoses.

OP hasn't said what her daughter's levels were but this is something that is a blood test to measure and would right away tell the doctors if she had been taking more than a safe dose and if there was an overdose.

you’ll have to explain to him as though he’s a child that he needs to read the instruction leaflet before giving medication.

What dose was he actually giving her OP?

It really isn't uncommon for parents to look up information on health issues and medication online on NHS websites.

It's less common if they're not in the UK and not using UK medicines, though. And it's probably best discouraged if they appear to be incapable of correctly applying the dosage instructions on the NHS website to the medicine they actually have in their hands, like the OP's husband. He, in particular, needs to read and apply the instructions in the leaflet that came with the medicine he is trying to give his daughter.

Clearly he needs to be more careful regardless of the source he uses - I was responding to the insults directed at him for looking at a legitimate source of health information. I would warrant there are many parents on this very thread who have given their child a medication without reading the entirety of the leaflet inside the packaging and who have looked up information online on reputable sites. Neiither of those actions necessarily mean you aren't a competent adult or that you are an idiot or a fool or that you don't love or care about your child.

@Midlifemusings the op’s husband apparently looked up a totally different medication on the NHS website. If you’re making the point that it’s reasonable to use the NHS resources I agree. But you need to look at the bottle/packaging of the medication you’re giving too. It’s a basic step.

How was he not listening to the OP? He double and triple checked the dose like she asked, he was just accidentally using the wrong guidance page.

It really isn't uncommon for parents to look up information on health issues and medication online on NHS websites.

OP isn’t in the UK and her husband isn’t even British. Looking at the NHS website makes no more sense than it would for a Dad in the UK to look at a Canadian or Australian website to find out how much British Calpol to dose.

If OP and her husband were living here and she posted that her husband had done just that, I wonder if the replies would be as sympathetic to his mistake? Or is it just because it’s the NHS that people are saying it was an understandable mistake?

And in fact one of the very first bullet points on the NHS page says this:

There are different types of paracetamol for children, including 2 strengths of syrup. The strength and dosage depends on your child's age (and sometimes weight), so always read the instructions carefully.

So even the NHS page he was supposedly consulting told him to read the actual medicine instructions and check the dosage.