Dog tried to bite my baby

[UserICantThinkOfAUsername]

Morning all. So I've never had dogs, don't know much about them, never really trusted them either.

Yesterday at my PIL house one of the dogs tried to bite my 11 month olds nose in a completely unprovoked attack (she was just crawling next to the dog). Luckily my partner was quick and stopped the dog but she almost bit our LG nose. I didn't allow the dog near her the rest of the day. Previously, said dog has been very protective of my baby and gets upset when she cries etc so we are shocked she's tried biting her. But obviously now I do not trust the dog at all... I am also due our 3rd baby in September who PIL are the default childcare if I go into hospital (planning a homebirth). It's a very close family and we regularly go to their house for gatherings. AIBU to say I will not be going to their home anymore with children if said dog is there?

Babies should never be left unsupervised with dogs. That mean that if there is a dog in the room, you supervise. Keep the baby well away from the dog, on your lap if necessary.

But its always a 'family dog' that bites kids on the face. You do not have young babies and a dog together, ever. I have a GSD who gets crated if we have visitors. He is super, great temprament, loving etc but he is also a dog.

Dogs should never, ever be trusted around babies & young children. Either the dog needs to be shut away when you go round or you meet somewhere else & the dog is left at home/with a sitter. And I think you’ll have to find alternative childcare for during your birth, there’s no way I would risk my baby being in the same house as a dog for an extended period of time, they won’t be able to keep them separate the whole time or PIL might not follow instructions to do so.

@UserICantThinkOfAUsername - ''...my partners family always have had dogs, so I trusted their judgement.''

Don't.

Don't automatically trust the judgement of people who have always had dogs OP. Always having had dogs doesn't make people knowlegable or sensible. In fact it can make them overly sentimental and cloud the clear judgement that you yourself have right now actually.

Read the news. All these awful dog attacks - they're nearly always in a family setting and everyone is always ''surprised and horrified'' that the animal attacked. None of them will be saying ''oh yeah we knew Rover was a badun'' .... Think about it.

Read a few bits about dog behaviour. There's a dog in the family so you need to educate yourself now and make your own mind up.

''I won't allow baby and dog to be together again and will make this clear to PIL and BIL.''

Good for you - but you might meet A LOT of opposition, so prepare yourself for it. Stay calm and stick to your guns. Good luck.

i am a bit lost...why wasnt there a conversation with your PIL after the incident? If you have not made a big issue out of it or made it clear at the time of the seriousness they may be oblivious. It seems you and your DP didnt respond in a way that would have triggered a discussion with his parents there and then, I would have been horrified if that happened to my DC and immediately spoken to the owners and made clear that the dog was not to be around my DC. You needed to see their response as that will help guide you whether they can be trusted. The fact you dont know how they feel just seems mad...if they minimise the incident and dont take it seriously then you cant leave your DC with them when you have your baby

You are absolutely right to be concerned and not trust the dog. However, can’t the dog just not be in the same room? Kept in the utility or kitchen or something with door closed whilst your kids are there?

Why on earth aren't people more responsible with their dogs? There is no way I'd allow a dog in the same room as a baby.
My cat was a biter she would just attack visitors so if I had people over the cat would be firmly and comfortably locked in my bedroom until they left and there is no way I'd have trusted her with children.

Dogs are unpredictable- surely all the news stories show this? Your child should not be crawling near the dog. Don’t blame your in-laws when you were there.
A stair gate separating the dog while your child is crawling around would be best.

Trouble with this comes when having to trust other people totally to do this in your absence.

Once there's a seed of doubt - what do you do?

I don't think you can expect their dog not to be in the house when you visit, but you can certainly make sure it's always separated from your child/on a lead when your child is there.

Yep.

There is no such thing as a dog that is 'unprovokable'. Any dog can be startled or provoked, and sometimes their reactions are hard to predict. If a dog is tired, or ill, or has been stressed the previous day, their tolerance level may be compromised.

I would keep any child under about 8 in close supervision or separate. Babies and toddlers only when I am in direct close supervision and dog on lead, and only for a very short period (come and clap it and say hello, okay, no more than that - and my dog is super friendly).

So YANBU, OP. Hope you can discuss amicably, but I think it's sensible & reasonable to say that the dog needs to be kep separated from your children. You could shift the focus onto keeping the baby away from the dog if that is easier?

@livelyredjellybean stick to walking the dogs; you do not WAIT to see aggression

Once a dog does that they are no longer safe, really they should be having that dog pts, are you going to wait until it bites one of your children's faces off? I would not be visiting them whilst they still have the dog, they can come to you. My brother has dogs, one bit my husband on the leg (before we had children) our children have never been round their house because of the dog. If the dog had done that to one of our children I'd have reported it. I get the dog is a family pet but once a dog bites they should be put down. Too many cases of poor children being mauled to death in the news.

I've a 2 inch scar on my arm from my mother's toy poodle biting me about 15 years ago.
I agree that you're

I love dogs, have two of my own but you are not overreacting to say you don't want your DC around this dog ever again, it's just not worth the risk. I have a 2 year old DGC, my dogs go in their crate when he's here despite being lovely, sociable and much loved pets and never having shown any aggression to anyone. I genuinely don't understand anyone who doesn't do the same with visiting children, the consequences of my dogs hurting someone, especially a child, are just too awful to contemplate doing anything else.

Sorry, agree that you're under reacting.
I know a professional middle aged person who recently had to have their nose reattached after working with a family pet who had no history of biting. They face years of surgery and the cosmetic side is only part of the problem.
Don't trust your children with these dogs and never allow them to crawl into the dogs territory.

I’d bet there were signs the dog wasn’t comfortable long before it tried to bite. Not defending the dog at all here but if you don’t understand dogs then keep your baby away from them.

YANBU. Keep that dog away from your children. It's your job to protect them.

I have 3 dogs. Sweetest dogs everywhere however as a responsible dog owner, I would never allow children and dogs to be together unsupervised, especially with a crawling baby. My dogs are always put away in another room.
Have you spoken to your PIL about this incident?

My mother didn't protect us from grandparents' dogs. I remember crouching terrified as a small child behind a bush with a snarling dog on the other side of the bush. My brother has a big scar near his eye where he was bitten as a child. 1cm more in the wrong direction and he would have lost his eye. Please don't do this to your kids. I had PTSD from childhood because of those dogs.

Don’t let your kids crawl on the floor where there are dogs around. Full stop.

Your PIL's home is the dog's space, so your DC crawled into that space and the dog snapped. I'd be looking at alternative childcare, as I wouldn't have my DC there when your in-laws aren't seeing why the day you descirbed might trigger their dog. You're also going to have a baby who grows into a toddler. My DS, as a toddler, got up off the sofa where he was watching tv, dashed across the room and got my mother's sleeping dog in a headlock, out of the blue. Both she and I were in the room but it happend so quickly. I dived for DS and mum for her dog. DS was never left unsupervised with the dog and we became aware it was the "starting to get tired" witching hour when he tried this (he attempted it once again a couple of weeks later but was stopped before he reached the dog). Your baby will grow o be equally unpredictable.

Without taking away from the advice and concern shown in this thread, it sounds like the dog was snapping at the child (telling it off) rather than trying to bite them. If a dog tried to bite a baby, it would have done.

We keep our dog away from my sister's baby when she comes to visit. Mainly because we're worried about him knocking a baby over who's just learning to toddle, but also so we can sanitise the floor without the dog making it dirty again.

poor dog! I never trust children around my dogs and never have done. Kids are unpredictable and its not the dogs (or the child's) fault if the child does something the dog finds scarey or triggering.
Yes families have dogs and the families who have dogs and kids safely are the ones who protect both the kids and the dogs.

Dogs and babies is a very different thing to dogs and older children.

The dog is now three years older, that can be the difference between a puppy and an adult dog, or between an adult dog and a senior dog. Dogs, like humans, can change behaviour with age.

Any interaction between pets and babies/young children should be closely supervised. Do not be complacent.