Would it be such a bad thing to set your children up financially so that they never have to work?

[wonderingWallaby]

Let’s assume from the age of 21 you provide them with a monthly/annual allowance of x amount (a substantial figure), and they will receive this for the remainder of their life. Obviously I wouldn’t be happy if they spent all day sleeping, playing video games etc. But if the money allowed them to avoid the rat race that is work, maybe that’s not such a bad thing? I know there are a lot of positives to working, but my thought process is that life is short. And if you’re in a position where you don’t have to work or you can ensure your children don’t have to work, is that really such a bad thing?

Depends totally on the child, doesn't it?

We could do this with DS1 and he'd still be a busy bee. It's just his nature to work or have some project going so he'd most likely have a 'hobby job' or start up some type of business. He's like his dad in that. We could give him an allowance 'free and clear' and he'd be fine.

DS2 has a very good work ethic and is a good and hard-working employee, but left to his own devices he'd just as soon not have to work and would prefer to lay around playing games or watching telly. He's like me in that. If we gave him an allowance it would have to be contingent on some kind of work or charitable endeavors. Otherwise he'd end up a slug.

@Louise0701

thats what Op is suggesting though. She will give her kids money so that they don’t have to work

Why do your kids deserve to do that any more than anyone else though? What makes them special and above working for a living? In an ideal world we’d all just fuck about doing what we liked but most people manage to do it around work, or make their passion into a job/business that pays.

Any idea that promotes hereditary/generational wealth should be agressivley discouraged.

But you could say that about millions of things - attending private school, living in big homes, having their own bedrooms, going on foreign holidays...where do you draw the line?

It’s interesting how many posts seem to think people can only contribute to society if they are in paid employment.

Lots of unpaid volunteers contribute massively in many areas, and society would be considerably poorer if they all had paid jobs just because it was the done thing.

Yeah I’d also quite like to abolish private schools and have a 100% inheritance tax so my bar is pretty high.

No. I absolutely wouldn’t do it. No way.

Firstly, I don’t think you would properly appreciate not having to work until you have worked.

Secondly, I know a few people who’ve never had to work. None of them live lives I would want for my children. They don’t volunteer or contribute to their communities or fill their time valuably in any way. They drink, they take drugs and they buy stuff. That’s their existence.

I don’t think a lifetime of paid work is in any way essential but I think a life completely free of it is a recipe for disaster.

Love this! definitely life goals, sounds like a really nice life @Louise0701 . I get we’re people are coming from with the whole “work gives you meaning” thing, but it feels like a total failure of imagination too when people think the only way to feel worth is to paid by someone else. Labours of love are really rewarding from what I’ve seen, and if you can help people- even better

You do realise that your husband's very successful business and investments are only successful because they exploit people who have to work right?

exactly! I don’t want my kids having that kind of superiority complex - I don’t think it would make them nice people

If it could be managed properly, I agree. Conditions attached such as completing further education, volunteering, starting a business. I haven't thought it through, but it sounds interesting.

I've seen it in action and it didn't go well. It led to a lifetime of not really doing much at all, constant low-level drug use, surrounded by spongers instead of real friends and a relatively early death. Of course there's no guarantee that this person would have been any happier being poorer, but I think most people grow through dealing with consequences of their choices and learn to make better choices. The independently wealthy don't have that sort of forced learning because they can buy their way out of consequences.

Exactly!

What about them @Louise0701 those people who work to actualise your husbands investment and business?? When do they get to volunteer and “be there for” for their children?

Okay, and what about all the millions of other ways children are advantaged because of their parents?

Are you going to ban foreign holidays? Children having their own rooms? Houses with swimming pools and tennis courts? Buying your child a car or driving lessons when they turn seventeen? Passing on your own knowledge skills/to your children in case it gives them an unfair advantage in the workplace? Private tutors? Music lessons or sports because not everyone can afford it?

Where do you stop?

@coffeecupsandfairylights

bit of a difference between funding a few driving and setting up your children so they never have to work a day in their life

What purpose in life would they have then? Sounds like a terrible idea to me.

I'd buy them a house, and help them out if they wanted to train for a specific career/start their own business, but I can't see the benefit in giving them that much that they don't have to bother doing anything for themselves.

I know a family who did this. Three children all had expenses paid so didn’t have to work. All three have had a turbulent time. One is alcohol dependent, the other two have drug addictions. They have all attempted to work and failed. All three have had failed relationships and poor relationships with their own children.

Work gives you purpose, opportunities for learning, routine, meaning, friendships and connections. It gives you an ability to contribute to society and gives you something meaningful to say. The family I know have none of that. Everyone of their age is working or learning. They are bumming around all day by themselves.

Why do you think work is a rat-race? It really doesn’t have to be.

Oh and just to add…they have awful relationships with their parents (who gave them the money in the first place). Two won’t speak to their parents at all. The other one lives in another country and sees them once a year.

A poor outcome on every level.

@LuckySantangelo35 I take it you purposefully ignored my response to you when you asked what I do with my day and are choosing to try any jump on other untrue comments instead.

@Thebestwaytoscareatory that’s not the case in our situation.

@Gettingthingsdone777 thank you. I feel very lucky and I’m very happy with my life.

@Gettingthingsdone777 thank you. I feel very lucky and I’m very happy with my life.

But giving your child driving lessons and a car still gives them a huge advantage over children who have to fund those things themselves.

You say you don't agree with private school - presumably because it gives an unfair advantage, so why draw the line there and not elsewhere? I mean, if private school was banned, rich parents would just pay for private tutoring and the same divide would still exist...

Em, I feel like some of these responses are more of an argument against capitalism- which- fair enough! I’d probably agree with radical redistribution first and foremost. If everyone started from the same level of wealth that would be fairest of all. I don’t think it’s particularly fair to shame people for being a bit well off and making the most of it.

If we’re being realistic, a lot of people on here probably live to a relatively high standard when looked at globally, there are probably many sacrifices some of us could make very easily which would be massively beneficial to someone else where in the world.

Example, there’s a charity were they give the poorest people in the world the equivalent of 15 dollars a month every month over 5-10 years, 85% of donations to the charity goes direct to the people and there are no conditions or strings attached. Totally transformative for the people who get it, they thrive, they massively improve their housing, education, their businesses. Health is better, mental health is better and where there are whole towns receiving it, they attract new businesses and grow and improve. That’s probably equivalent of monthly cost of streaming services , pretty cheap way of transforming someone’s life, most people could stretch to that if they wanted to but don’t for various reasons. So I think it’s worth being mindful that a lot (not all) of us lead pretty unfairly privileged lives compare to the rest of the world just because of where we were born and could easily change that if we wanted to. Which of us can say we live a life that doesn’t exploit others, at all? Given that most governments invest taxes in really corrupt and exploitative industries like oil and tech, so many goods we use everyday come from places were people have few rights and little wealth. what about the people who got 50p to make an item of your clothing, work 16 hour days and never get to “be there for” their children either? Is it more okay because they’re far away?

How many of these volunteers have never been in paid employment?

Lots of people have jobs then retire early and continue working as volunteers. That's very different to growing up knowing you'll never have to earn a penny if you don't fancy it.