How to handle bonkers request from neighbour

[DaphneMoonsSeattle]

We live on a small estate (22 houses). One of my neighbours knocked on my door yesterday to ask if I could please stop my DC riding their scooters past her house.

Today my DD came in to tell me that the neighbour had now asked her not to ride on the footpath outside her house. I went outside. She asked me why my DC ride on the footpath right outside her house. I told her; it's a footpath. They're allowed on the footpath. I have asked DD to avoid being right outside her house but my DS is autistic. I've told her that. He doesn't understand "don't ride your scooter on this particular bit of the footpath".

But, aibu to think that what she's asked is unreasonable? You can't ask people to not use a footpath! They are not on her property, fair enough she can absolutely ask people not to be on her property, but she can't control the footpath. She's complained that they ride their scooters near her car. Her car is parked right beside the footpath. She's in a corner house so she probably does have more footpath outside her house than most. But that's not really anybody's fault. She's really taking it personally. 'They're outside MY house'. They're on the footpath, they're not peeking in her windows!

If she works from home and your DC is scooting up and down constantly on those hard wheels that make so much noise and it's constant...YABU. Limit the time your DC spends making noise right outside her house and try being a considerate neighbour. Work out a compromise.

This I'd say.

I grew up with a neighbour who called the police if kids played outside her house or if a ball game into her garden.

She was fucking batshit.

Not helpful @emmetgirl . The OP has to live near these people for the foreseeable future. If the neighbour was polite, there's no need for the OP not to be!

I do admit, they would be on the scooters a lot. It's the noise she objects to. And it probably IS annoying. I just think, that's part of living in a housing estate. Dogs barking, babies crying, cars honking, ice cream vans. It's annoying but you can't stop everything that you personally find annoying. I will try with a diagram but I am terrible at drawing!

Well, walking past someone’s house is usually how to use a footpath. If they are noisy, and lingering outside her house, or whizzing past every 2 minutes then I do understand her annoyance. Like with autism, some people are sensitive to noise and it can cause them huge distress. With a bit of understanding, I think there’s usually a happy middle to be found.

Shitty diagram time.

X is neighbours house, Y is mine and Z is where she parks her car.

Why can't I see it !

Unless you live in the middle of a field you will encounter people going about their business. That includes riding bikes/scooters. As long as they are not encroaching/damaging others property its tough shit.
Had a couple of neighbours complaining about my kids rollerblading in the street.
I told the kids to ignore them

Yes, I will absolutely agree to a compromise, I said that yesterday when she knocked on the door. That's the best we can do. I can agree hours or times or something but she can't stop them completely!

The noise if she's working from home is a really good point. Likewise if she does shift work. Agree with pp that if either is the case you need to be considerate and work out a compromise to keep the noise down during those hours.

Are they outside hef house alot or just passing to go somewhere?

I imagine the noise would be annoying if they're constantly riding past.

If she's a corner plot could you just ask dd not yo go as far as the corner house.....

Hmm, I'll try again with the pic.

Is your dd doing this continuously? If so maybe your ndn has a point. It's like the argument with trampolines, that's annoying if it's continuous outside your back door.

My son's are both autistic. If your son cannot understand the instruction then he really should be supervised when outside and you can constantly remind him.

Or draw lines on the footbath in chalk and keep reinforcing to the children that they can't go past the line. My sons have always been better with visual prompts than verbal. Obviously everyone is different but it might be worth a try.

You're probably thinking why should I?

Yes, she doesn't own the footpath and she's being unreasonable but it's not a massive adjustment to make. You have to live there and there are other parts of the footpath your children can use. The last thing you want is her ending up shouting at your children or them falling off their scooter onto her car. You'd never hear the end of it.

She can't do anything about it as she doesn't own the road. I'd ask her why. It could be really affecting her, or she could just be being an arse. Can she not park her car outside her house for a bit then your DS will naturally find another route?

How many hours a day is DC on the footpath?

Is it just worse because it’s half term, and the kids are out playing more?

(And ppl complain about children being inside all the time!)

How often per day and are they making a lot of noise? Nobody minds children going past but up and down every few mins all day whilst shouting is very different. Same goes for most child related noise, it's the hours on end that's a problem

They don't stop outside the house, it's a corner but it's also in the middle! I know that sounds weird. There are three 'blocks' of houses. One two-house block (kind of in the middle) and a five house block on one side, another five house block on the other side and then another five at a right angle. Also four houses in their own little square. That's 21 houses. This neighbours house then is at an edge, facing the frontage of the pair of house that make up the 'two block'.

Is he going repetiviley up and down outside her house? Even if he is, I can't see how much noise a scooter actually makes that it would be annoying unless he's shrieking or shouting at the same time?

If you want to live in silence you need to go and live in a nice big detached house with acres of land. If you can't you have to suck it up!

Your neighbour is completely unreasonable. If you don't like children playing don't live on an estate like that.

Could they change their route and go right from your house for a change

Thank you @IncompleteSenten (great username btw!) I can absolutely try that. She might give out about me chalking the footpath 😁 but it's worth a try. Visual aids work well with my DS too.

@yesthatisdrizzle

I said "strictly speaking".

See s72 Highway Act 1835.

Also are you adequately supervising, my children never played out on the street without myself or my neighbour (or both) keeping an eye and it was limited to an hour morning and afternoon in the holidays so as not to annoy neighbours. My dd is autistic too and was very good at not going past a certain point (and ensuring none of the other children did either, she was big on rules).