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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How to handle bonkers request from neighbour

251 replies

DaphneMoonsSeattle · 31/05/2022 16:38

We live on a small estate (22 houses). One of my neighbours knocked on my door yesterday to ask if I could please stop my DC riding their scooters past her house.

Today my DD came in to tell me that the neighbour had now asked her not to ride on the footpath outside her house. I went outside. She asked me why my DC ride on the footpath right outside her house. I told her; it's a footpath. They're allowed on the footpath. I have asked DD to avoid being right outside her house but my DS is autistic. I've told her that. He doesn't understand "don't ride your scooter on this particular bit of the footpath".

But, aibu to think that what she's asked is unreasonable? You can't ask people to not use a footpath! They are not on her property, fair enough she can absolutely ask people not to be on her property, but she can't control the footpath. She's complained that they ride their scooters near her car. Her car is parked right beside the footpath. She's in a corner house so she probably does have more footpath outside her house than most. But that's not really anybody's fault. She's really taking it personally. 'They're outside MY house'. They're on the footpath, they're not peeking in her windows!

OP posts:
MzHz · 31/05/2022 16:41

We’re going to need a diagram…

you know da rules…

🤣😅

Borisblondboufant · 31/05/2022 16:43

I’ve no advice but on the estate i grew up we had neighbours like that. In the 1980s and few cars we used to play on the streets and pavements in the side streets.
there was a house that had heavy net curtains and an ‘old couple’ lived there and shouted if you did anything outside their house. Even in passing. Bonkers. And we did.
now I would tell them to buy the pavement and the road if they want control of it….

DashboardConfessional · 31/05/2022 16:43

It's a bit late but I think I would have adopted a puzzled expression and asked "Why?" until she realised there was no logical answer!

CruCru · 31/05/2022 16:44

Yeah it’s bonkers. Your children are using the footpath

Antarcticant · 31/05/2022 16:44

Is it a publicly owned footpath? I.e. not an unadopted one?

Sisiwawa · 31/05/2022 16:45

Footpath is not part of her property so she cannot dictate that. Tell your daughter to carry on.
What a miserable neighbour.

Hugasauras · 31/05/2022 16:45

Yep, bonkers. We are in a cul de sac and often have kids scooting or cycling past as it's a safe bit for them to be in. I like seeing them going past and being out and about!

Presumably there's no back story like they are egging her house on the way past so I'd just say that they aren't doing any harm or any damage and they're entitled to use the footpath just like anyone else.

HelpIneedsomebodywontyouplease · 31/05/2022 16:45

Is it the noise of the hard wheels on the paving that’s bothering her or the worry over her car?
how often/long is he riding it for?
There could be a world of difference on how unreasonable (if at all) it is depending on if it’s 5 hours a day of rattling past her house or half an hour tbh.

VeniVidiWeeWee · 31/05/2022 16:46

Strictly speaking they're not allowed on the pavement. But if dd is under 10 there's nothing to be done.

HelpIneedsomebodywontyouplease · 31/05/2022 16:46

#She

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 31/05/2022 16:47

tell her she must be confused and show her where her boundary line is- then tell her to get a life!

JackieCollinshasnoauthority · 31/05/2022 16:48

I would be disinclined to acquiesce to her request.

If she's unhappy, tell her to report to the relevant enforcement agency.

StormTreader · 31/05/2022 16:48

She's complained that they ride their scooters near her car. Her car is parked right beside the footpath

Wait for her to go out, park your car right outside her house, problem solved.

Original poster
DaphneMoonsSeattle · 31/05/2022 16:48

It's a footpath within the estate, as opposed to being on a public road. Why are they not allowed on a footpath? It's inside the estate.

OP posts:
crumble82 · 31/05/2022 16:49

Is she annoyed at them riding past her house on their way somewhere or are they stopping and playing on their scooters outside her house for a period of time. If it’s the latter I think it’s probably fair enough to ask them to move on (although unenforceable) but if they’re just riding past then she’s being ridiculous

WatermelonSugarEye · 31/05/2022 16:49

I know the type, She owns the road!

Original poster
DaphneMoonsSeattle · 31/05/2022 16:49

@StormTreader That's a great idea! 😆

OP posts:
JaniceBattersby · 31/05/2022 16:50

For some reason, there are some people who believe that they have a right to live in complete silence, without anyone going within 100m of their house or car or even looking at them, all with the convenience of living in a built-up area close to local amenities.

Just ignore these people.

ImAvingOops · 31/05/2022 16:51

I have some sympathy for the neighbours. I used to live on a corner plot snd everyone dumped their rubbish right by my house the night before bin day. Yes, they had the legal right to because it was on the pavement, but it was smelly and messy and sometimes there for days of the collection got delayed.
So something doesn't have to be technically on your property to be annoying.
From her pov, what if your kids (and others) scoot too close to her car and scratch it? Or get used to playing there and hit it with a football? I think she thinks that they are your children so why aren't they playing outside your house?
It's true she doesn't own the street but I can see why it's irritating her.

Ncwinc · 31/05/2022 16:51

Are your DC riding back and forth between your house and the neighbour’s house over and over again?

rnsaslkih · 31/05/2022 16:53

Are the kids near the car? Is she worried about them damaging it?

Watermill · 31/05/2022 16:53

I think we need a diagram, I am not following this. If it's not a pavement but a footpath in the estate, how is her car right next to it?

yesthatisdrizzle · 31/05/2022 16:54

VeniVidiWeeWee · 31/05/2022 16:46

Strictly speaking they're not allowed on the pavement. But if dd is under 10 there's nothing to be done.

Kids' scooters are allowed on the pavement, but they need to give way to pedestrians. Human-powered, not electric.

emmetgirl · 31/05/2022 16:58

Tell them to piss off.

Basilbrushgotfat · 31/05/2022 16:58

How tempting it must be to give them a pack of chalk and tell them to go nuts on that section of pavement...

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