People who talk too much

[Chataholic]

(I’m one of them), can we be rehabilitated?

Why would you want to be? I love to talk, I'd chat all day given the chance, and I drive my husband mad when he's waiting for me, but I think of it as a positive thing. I'll talk to anyone and you never know who you are going to meet and what you can learn from them.

I’m one of them too. I don’t think the talking too much is a issue but my over sharing probably is 😬, I tend to ramble on and say things I should probably keep to myself.

When you say you talk too much, what do you mean? Are you just chatty or do you monologue? There was a thread in relationships about the latter a while ago.

If you are just chatty then that is your personality and there’s nothing wrong with that.

You don’t mean chatty like this do you?

Sorry, that should have said “You don’t mean chatty like this, do you?”

I find it really annoying when people talk too much. You obviously know you’re doing it, so why do you just carry on?

I know a talker. Literally can’t let a second of silence go by without filling it. I adore her but she’s a short burst person for me!
I once drove her to Cornwall (about 3 hours or so) and my god I swear she didn’t pause for breath, I had to go and have a lie down before we went out that night - I dreaded the return journey and she chewed my ear off the whole way home aswell, mostly nattering about people I don’t know, colleagues I’ve never met and holidays I didn’t go on 😂
We do always have a good laugh and I do enjoy the mindless chatter from time to time, she’s good company.

How nasty. You can avoid people or walk away, don't chastise people for their personality.

OP you chat to whoever you like, as long as you and them seem comfortable. I love a chat.

I suppose the question is, do you talk with someone or at them? Can you read body language so that, if it’s a bit much for someone, you pick up on it and stop?

I'm too chatty according to my husband. I lost my voice for 3 days last week as I was ill.

Apparently it was the best 3 days of his life 😭

It’s not nasty at all. OP said she talks too much. It’s no better than playing music that other people don’t want to hear. It’s inconsiderate and annoying

This is me and some times I feel I'm out of control and can hear it coming out but just can't stop 🤷🏼‍♀️. I know I'm annoying but obviously unlike @Blowyourowntrumpet I'm not perfect (apt user name by the way 🙄)

I think so
I had a colleague who worked hard to pull back on her constant talking and interrupting

My mum was also quite bad at chatting in tense times when silence was better. I don't know why no mentioned it before, but it finally got resolved when dad and I told her, politely, that she was really winding us up.

I think if you feel you really need to alter it, you will try.

This is so mean 😂

I'm an introvert who doesn't say very much and I'm a big fan of peace and quiet.

I have a colleague who does not shut up. I think she's wonderful and I don't mind in the slightest. I can't help being quiet, she can't help being chatty, it's all good!

I avoid chatty people. They make my head rattle and explode.

Lots of different ways of talking too much:

Being bubbly and enthusiastic, happy, positive and outgoing - okay in small doses...
Being overbearing, dominant, controlling the conversation.
Oversharing or Being too inquisitive
Being boring, going on and on about irrelevant stuff or things others aren't interested in
Not reading the room and putting your foot in various controversial subjects
Etc.

Oh well that’s the thing, i catch myself after it’s well underway and realise a bit late. People (friends) say they don’t mind, it’s funny or interesting or whatever, but they might just be being polite? Maybe lockdowns eroded my social confidence and I’m chatty within the normal bounds, not overbearing.

I'm aware I'm a terrible person but I switch off when people talk for too long.

Ah, but you do catch yourself? I’d probably say that you are bubbly and outgoing then. You are able to read someone else’s body language and be considerate of others.

The sort of chatty I was thinking of was more like having someone talk AT me constantly, getting faster and louder whenever I clear my throat or look as though I might say something. This feels as though I am trapped in a small space and gives me a similar stress response.

I'm quiet so love it when someone's chatty and I can just nod and join in now and then. But there are definitely people who talk too much and don't let me talk at all. That annoys me. It's selfish! I don't mind if someone does 80% of the talking but let me say a few words now and then.

I am quite chatty but think I can tell when I’m starting to bore someone. Quite good at turning it off then.
I do find I can only get close to people that share though. I’m a sharer and if we’re going to be pals then I need a sharer as well.
I don’t think either quiet or loud person is ‘wrong’ you just need to find the right people for you 😃

YANBU. I have the same problem. To the people saying, “If you know you’re doing it, just stop”, it is as against the nature of a very chatty person to shut up as it is for a very shy/quiet person to speak up regularly. It’s not as easy as just not talking, it takes concerted effort.

Hope I don’t do that! I just warm to whatever it is, it’s exciting when you find common ground with someone and equally exciting when your opinions conflict. It’s stimulating.

Then you sound a pleasure to hang out with.

Surely "too much" chat for one person is just "a friendly person" for another? 🤷‍♀️