Postnatal Ward Hell!

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AIBU to ask if the postnatal word is actually the 7th circle of hell?

On a ward with 4 others. One has been scrolling through songs on their phone for the last two hours only listening to the first 5 seconds of each one. One couple have bought a tv pass and have the One Show on full volume, they are then making video calls over the top of the TV and rowing about why their newborn won't settle (because the poor thing is thinking wtf is all this shouting?). The poor midwives are so understaffed everything is running late, including everyone's painkillers which were due an hour and a half ago. I've had a c section and I'm absolutely boiling and for some reason the heating is on!

Maybe I'm just a grumpy old woman but I'm starting to lose my mind here! Why can't people just be quiet!

@Badgirlriri

Maybe rather than always blaming the staff, people could reflect and take responsibility for their own actions. Why do the majority of people now lack self awareness, compassion and empathy for other people. Why are the majority of people selfish?

I totally agree. It's not the fault of the staff. Although I do think the hospitals need to tighten rules.

@Maiyakat

that is terrible management 101.

I’ve been there and it was hell
the heat
the woman in the next bed snoring like a steam train
the nurses waking me up in the night to check I’d fed baby enough-well,she looked ok to me-she’s wasn’t screaming for a feed-who many ml’s had she had?how the fuck do I know?shes breast fed
the lights-I have to have the room darker than my soul to get to sleep-lights on everywhere
the old bitch who walked up,picked up my baby and walked off-I was an hysterical nutter for demanding my baby back (I still don’t know where she took her)
being treated like an inconvenience for daring to ask where the toilets where,where the tea machine was,anything at all
the bounty woman and her photos/demanding my data

the men-I remember I just wanted to close the curtains,sit on the bed and breastfeed in peace while having a cry to myself
oh no,the curtains had to be open at all times-and the couple opposite me (her in bed,him in the chair) just gawped at me the whole time
i had to get a tit out,while gulping back tears,latch her on and avoid eye contact with the couple gawping
he sat there with the oddest smile I’ve ever seen and he was open legged with a massive boner (at one point,he was touching himself over his trousers but in a way that nobody walking past would notice)
she didn’t seem to think there was anything wrong with this
he did fuck off to do the biggest,smelliest shit I’ve ever had to smell and came back to sit with his boner
i was meant to be there for 24 hours-I managed 15 hours before discharging myself

I vowed I’d have no more after that

Horrible, selfish people. I guess they don't try and enforce rules because nobody will follow them. It's awful.

My first stay was hell on earth - way too hot - so much so one of my visitors collapsed and I had to listen to a woman tell her mum she was going to fucking choke slam her when she got home.

It was beautiful.

Second was lovely - there was a young traveller girl with me singing to her baby lots, it was gorgeous. I was put on a quiet ward as my aunty was my midwife and she took my baby overnight for me twice so I could recover from section and actually sleep. It was so unbelievably appreciated.

Then security should escort the worst offenders off the premises, rather than it just be accepted that certain types will turn a hospital ward into a zoo.

That was me with my first one. Emergency csection, no staff to be seen and I was in a room with the Morphine Queen who ignored her baby, the lady who was CONSTANTLY asking for orange juice and a lovely Polish mum who's poor baby and her couldn't stop crying.
With my second I was in a side room, bags packed because I couldn't believe I was in a fricking side room. I was 100% sure they'd move me any second. Had a lovely first night there though.

@Imnotahippo thats appalling.

I had a horrendous post natal ward experience - kind of an amalgam of the stories above. I d/c myself 18 hours after a c-section against advice. Saved up and went private with DC2. Not for the medial care but so that I could have a room to myself and painkillers on time. No PTSD or PND second time around.

I feel for you, I was lucky enough to have a private room but I had a drug addict who was rattling & screaming for her next fix on one side & a woman who was having her baby taken in to care on the other. Somehow I had been put on a totally different ward to the area I live in & had been put on the roughest area ward, it was hell on Earth, I saw things I had never seen before & hope to never see again, fights, arguments, drunkeness, one woman who I thought had a crochet navy blue nightie on but it was tattoos & when she turned round the pattern continued up her face. We were supposed to go down the corridor to collect breakfast but were told to not leave our babies on their own, I didn't bother & my husband or mum brought me food in. I agree it is like Jeremy Kyle live.

So inhumane.

Wow aren't you a delightful snob

Poor you, they are hell on earth.
I was out as quick as possible with my two. My worst time was being placed in the bed nearest the ward sink with a curtain that wouldn't close around the whole bed area so I had to choose between being open to the ward or open to the sink. I was breastfeeding and uncomfortable and had every fucking tom, dick and Harry using the sink (including grandads and kids etc) and having a good old gawp at me in bed feeding my son. I left within three hours and the midwife was quite offended I was so keen to leave! Add on boiling heat, stupid Bounty, someone having a stinking take away and the dirtiest bathroom I've ever seen I was off.

Congratulations op!

Oh god I remember this well. I begged to go home after one night because me or baby hadn't slept a wink and I'd been awake for 3 days straight, they were also super short staffed when we were in I felt so sorry for the poor midwives on shift.
Hope you and your new little one get home soon!

I was umming and ahhing about whether to have a home birth (currently 7mos pregnant with my second).

This thread has really helped me with me decision.

There were some really shitty things about having a 2020 baby but the postnatal was not one of them. No loud visitors!
Congratulations op.

Ugh wait until you try to sleep and the call buttons are ringing all night.

This thread has really helped me with me decision

Ooh I loved getting into my own shower, my own bed and having peace and quiet. Priceless.

I was deeply jealous of my friend who had a C section, one night in the hospital it was done in then transferred to the cottage hospital near where she lived where she had a family room with a double bed, fridge, kettle, microwave, sofa, television & her husband could stay with her. She was allowed to stay a week & every room had French doors, a patio to sit out on & gardens to take a walk in, apparently the food was all home cooked, the veg were grown in the hospital allotments & the chef was from a posh hotel, they got morning coffee & cake, afternoon tea & there was a drinks trolley where new mums were encouraged to have a sherry or Guiness to get there strength back, she went home with a suntan.

This thread has really helped me with me decision

Though not all hospital birth mums go to the postnatal ward afterwards, some are discharged straight home if all is well.

Oh God, me too. Spent 3 days on a ward from hell post c-section with twins, before being able to transfer to my local midwife led unit for another 24 hours. I was so tired and stressed with the pain i was hallucinating. Quite scary. The staff at the midwife unit got me fed, up straight with my pain meds & told me to SLEEP, which i was finally able to as it was so peaceful in comparison.
The lack of care & consideration for women post birth is shocking, imo. I wonder if there's been any research done into the impact of chaotic, noisy wards on recovery, so much of it unnecessary.

The one silver lining of my forceps/postpartum haemorrhage/3rd degree tear was that I was deemed ill enough to get a single room postnatally.

I'd already decided I wanted one but this has just cemented it. What the fuck am I reading! I'm currently pregnant with my first. Does everyone have to go to a postnatal ward after you've given birth? I thought you just had your baby in a room on your own and then got discharged home a few hours later. WTF. This sounds like an absolute nightmare.

Congratulations.

YANBU - I pretty much sprinted out of the hospital as soon as they said we could go home last time.

You will be home soon.

They segregated the hospital by "area you lived in"?!
Arf at you getting put in with the Skid Row brigade instead of the Sloane Ranger types befitting your status.
This didn't happen.

oh god help you having to see a heavily tattooed woman