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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is you’re husband as stupid as mine?

262 replies

MyHusbandIsVeryStupid · 26/05/2022 19:28

I went out for dinner last night with a bunch of my husbands work colleagues who I’ve not met before. We all got on great but I could tell there was a weird vibe between me and them.

Do you want to know why?

My job is a sexual health advisor.

Turns out when asked what I do he’s been telling people I’m a sex worker.

He actually thought that’s what sex worker meant. Thankfully I’ve put everyone straight and the weird tension eased. But omg what a bloody idiot.

Aibu to think he wins the stupid man award?

OP posts:
Newestname002 · 26/05/2022 21:43

MyHusbandIsVeryStupid · 26/05/2022 21:08

Thankfully he doesn’t go out much so his work colleagues are pretty much the only people he sees.

So - not extended members of your families? 🌹

CustardySergeant · 26/05/2022 21:43

"Our 7 year old described my hormonal pregnancy beard and snail trail to the fit PE teacher at school. I wanted to die."

I have no idea what that means. Probably for the best.

Original poster
MyHusbandIsVeryStupid · 26/05/2022 21:44

Newestname002 · 26/05/2022 21:43

So - not extended members of your families? 🌹

Show quote history

Well it’s me that talks about my job usually not him.

OP posts:
Greatoutdoors · 26/05/2022 21:49

Brilliant 😂
I’m a (nice) journalist. DS told his reception teacher I make up the stories in the newspaper.

Cheers, kid.

heidihigh · 26/05/2022 21:50

This is hilarious. Proper made my day Grin

FlySwimmer · 26/05/2022 21:52

😂😂😂

My grandad took on a courier role for several banks after he retired, just a few mornings a week. Took my cousin along one day. She then told her teacher that Grandad robbed banks for a living 😂

Hawkins001 · 26/05/2022 21:56

NancyDrooo · 26/05/2022 20:10

Years ago… word was the new dad in the school playground was high up in MI5. Hush hush, not to be mentioned. Looked the part too, handsome and a bit mysterious.

Except a few months later another mum went sofa shopping in the next town along and was shocked to see him… store manager at MFI.

Or these days, that's his undercover role, I have suspicions that someone I know of, rather than directly, could be an uncover for intelligence agencies.

HazelBite · 26/05/2022 21:57

Slightly different, but I used to work as a department manager in a store and our dress code was a smart black suit, on my way home from work I would run into this elderly man and chat to him on a fairly regular basis.
One day I ran into him in the queue at the local post office and he looked me up and down and said (very loudly) "Oh Hi Hazel how are you I didn't recognise you with your clothes on!"
The looks I got from the rest of the queue!

Original poster
MyHusbandIsVeryStupid · 26/05/2022 21:58

HazelBite · 26/05/2022 21:57

Slightly different, but I used to work as a department manager in a store and our dress code was a smart black suit, on my way home from work I would run into this elderly man and chat to him on a fairly regular basis.
One day I ran into him in the queue at the local post office and he looked me up and down and said (very loudly) "Oh Hi Hazel how are you I didn't recognise you with your clothes on!"
The looks I got from the rest of the queue!

That’s amazing 🤣

OP posts:
BinBandit · 26/05/2022 22:00

My ex SIL used to tell everyone she was a stripper just to get their reaction. It was technically true - that was her job title in the wire factory she worked in.

Oldfilmsareshit · 26/05/2022 22:01

This reply has been deleted

Trollhunting

Newbeginnings90 · 26/05/2022 22:01

This wins the internet for me tonight. GOLD.

NamechangeFML · 26/05/2022 22:02

I didnt have to read the thread to think "yeah probably- arent most of them?"

brilliant. A sex worker. Wtf ? imagine everyone hes said that too!!? Maybe they think a tame Only Fans? Hahhahahha

we were at a childrens party and sat next to a couple wed never met and their DC. The DH then described ( with mime) the sniping of his wifes vaj, during labour. She looked dead. Lol.

if its any consolation: my DM kept telling everyone in my home town that i was getting married in MAGALUF when she meant menorca...

DancyNancy · 26/05/2022 22:02

Oh I'm sorry OP but thank you for the giggle 😂

Hawkins001 · 26/05/2022 22:03

MyHusbandIsVeryStupid · 26/05/2022 21:31

My job title also came up in conversation because I have a job interview tomorrow, for those wondering.

All the best and positivity, a promotion or a new role ?

Queenbee77 · 26/05/2022 22:06

😂😂😂I have seldom laughed so much....😂😂
Kids eh?....sorry husband.....oh same thing.

BinBandit · 26/05/2022 22:06

Oh and my dad had the same name as a senior government minister. My dad was a security guard in the government office. After he retired my dad would continually get important government documents couriered to him at home for urgent signature...you'd have thought they would have clicked that a senior government minister was unlikely to be living in a small council flat in a fairly rough area...

watchingrnfire · 26/05/2022 22:07

😂😂😂😂 tried not peeing myself whilst reading!

But how did no one question him in 3 years about how he is so cool and open about his wife being a sex worker

Outwiththenorm · 26/05/2022 22:11

During a lesson on Christianity I announced to my RE class in high school that my dad was a Catholic and my mum was a prostitute (Protestant) 😬Just about lived that down 30 years later.

JudgeJ · 26/05/2022 22:14

SmallPrawnEnergy · 26/05/2022 20:54

For 3 years he’s been telling his colleagues you’re a sex worker and no point someone hasn’t probed further? Hmm If a colleague of mine said that I’d at least say “a sex worker?!” which would prompt a further conversation

Maybe his colleagues are more polite than you!

Dominuse · 26/05/2022 22:14

My nephew told his year 1 teacher that his mummy and daddy worked together.
He told them that ‘daddy knocks people out’ and ‘mummy cuts them up’

both of them are consultants in the hospital he is head of anaesthesia and she’s a surgeon - fortunately most people knew what they did.

Mosaic123 · 26/05/2022 22:15

My Dad told some Americans that he was a solicitor. Turns out it doesn't mean another word for lawyer to them.

They kind of backed away.

Ididanamechange · 26/05/2022 22:17

Not as funny as some of these but when planning our wedding reception my husband said he didn't want a breakfast for our wedding meal...

Original poster
MyHusbandIsVeryStupid · 26/05/2022 22:20

Hawkins001 · 26/05/2022 22:03

All the best and positivity, a promotion or a new role ?

Show quote history

Oh Thankyou! I’m so nervous.

new role, same sector. More pay! So Mr husband can go part time. Maybe read a book or two 🤣

OP posts:
ImInStealthMode · 26/05/2022 22:20

Amazing! A friend of mine when she was small told all her school teachers that her Daddy deals in drugs (he was a Dr with a specialism in the effects of narcotics and addiction).

I understand an awkward parent-teacher meeting was had GrinBlush