To ask if this childcare model exists?

[PeopleWillAlwaysNeedPlates]

DH and I both teach - me part-time SLT and him full-time headteacher, which I mention only to explain that we are in jobs with almost zero flexibility in term time.

We have two primary-age DC, one of whom has some SEN and health needs. We use a brilliant childminder for wraparound care. Grandparents are very very supportive but 100+ miles away on both sides, so although they are very happy to help with planned childcare they can’t help with emergencies.

I have the opportunity to go for a new role but realistically to make it work we would need an extra element to our childcare, which I’m not sure exists - hence this post. We would need someone who would be willing to be available to pick up the children if, for example, they were unexpectedly unwell in school or to care for them on an ad hoc basis if they were poorly. I imagine we’d have to pay some kind of retainer and then an hourly / daily rate for any care provided?

Does such a thing exist? Most of my friends have grandparents locally enough not to need to pay for this kind of support. Another friend has a similar arrangement with a nanny / housekeeper but we can’t afford this.

There are lots of emergency nanny agencies.

Lots of teaching couples manage this though OP?
Perhaps ask for this to be moved to Staffroom for others' experiences.

My guess is you might be able to have this type of arrangement but it would be ridiculously expensive because you're effectively asking someone to keep themselves free/v flexible all day every day termtime.

Do you have no friends in the community, SAHMs or just retired maybe, who could be on call? Or do your SEN child's needs make this too big an ask?

It doesn't sound like a role supportive of parents. Presumably your DH's role isn't either?

Have you had a look at the MTPT group? They're worth asking for this sort of thing....

(But I just backed out of an SLT interview because I knew I wouldn't be able to make the childcare work. This is a thing, and DfE have identified post children as being another point when teachers leave the profession- middle leaders)

www.mtpt.org.uk

We have managed this with a live in nanny. She provides wrap around care and is available in an emergency and for eg drs appointments during school hours. She's a student so for her the otherwise part time role and free room and board is helpful financially.

This does exist and I'm sure you can find someone suitable in your area I do something similar, for a local family on a adhoc basis

I'm a teaching assistant (very part time) so dbs checked, first aid etc and have lots of availability so it works well for both of us

Dh is a head teacher and I’m a head of department (part-time) with 2 primary age dc, so quite similar to you. I’m not sure if there is anything like you’re describing. We just manage between us, taking it in turns to be off when kids are ill. Dh tries to work his school calendar around mine. E.g doesn’t put parents evenings on the same night, governors are on one of my days off etc, It’s a juggling act, but it is possible. Is there a reason why you absolutely cannot ever be off school? I understand it’s less than ideal, but they’re not ill that often.

That’s the thing - many don’t. They either have family living locally, or one parent teaching with the other SAH or working in a job with more flexibility.

Your potential childcare issue is the same for so many other working parents who don't have family nearby to help out at short notice. What would you do just now if one of your children was unwell? I assume one of you would stay home/leave work early to take care of them. That's what you'd have to do in a new job too, though initially your DH would have to take more responsibility, at least until your probationary period is up.

I think it's worth asking your childminder what they would charge for this. It is likely to be quite expensive as she would need to basically keep two spots open for your kids but it's also fairly easy money so she might negotiate.

I think the other option would be to pay a nanny to do a combination of wraparound, school holiday and emergency cover. It might suit a nanny with their own child who might be more willing to negotiate as much of the time they would just get to be with their own child

It’s really difficult to leave school in the middle of the day. Supply cover has to be secured by 8am at the very latest. DH’s school is challenging and it is difficult for the headteacher to disappear.

The new role would in many ways be more flexible. It is a non-teaching role supporting across a group of schools. It is part-time and I would be able to manage my own diary to an extent, which is necessary to manage the various appointments that my youngest has for his health needs and SEN. However the schools are geographically much further than my current role and I would routinely be an hour away from home, and therefore the children’s schools.

Would you ask your childminder? My childminder did this. She was wonderful as we had no back up either.

Though usually if she had picked them up sick we would try to get there early to collect.

Not in the UK though so things less regulated here. I would just pay her the full daily rate when she had them all day.

It feels like mine are! We’ve had a terrible winter for illness, especially for my youngest. In particular he had a series of tummy bugs which meant 3+ days off each time due to the 48-hour rule.

Surely you have the same problem now if your children are ill? I don't understand why it would be any more difficult if you changed jobs?
What do you do now? Why wouldn't it work in your new job?
I don't think a childminder would be willing to care for a child who was ill. A nanny might but would probably cost quite a bit. It's worth looking in to though.
Other than that take it in turns to stay home with the children. It's not great but it's what all couples with children have to do.

Childminders can't take unwell children though, they'll give it to everyone else!

What job is this where you couldn't go an pick up an ill child? DH and I are both deputies, him of a very big and not very family orientated school. Neither of us is particularly expendable, but if DS is ill we just have to manage between us. We had zero family help when he was little. We'd alternate days/ half days off between us until he was well enough to be looked after by our babysitter if she was available. However, the number of times he had more than two days off in a row was very minimal.

My HT is a single parent, she still sometimes has days off for her teenagers if they need her.

You are not helping the profession by going along with the idea that our lives are suspended during term time.

Plenty of people are routinely an hour away, it's perhaps not ideal but fairly common I think. School just have to wait, you'll get there when you get there.

For days off sick I think an agency nanny is the answer, although expensive at the time, over a year probably less than paying someone a retainer.

I would, but she is understandably very cautious and won’t take any additional risk of bringing something communicable into the setting. She has a couple of former assistants who are now studying and living locally so they would be the kind of people I would ask, but I wanted to ask here if the model exists.

A childminder can do this? Although might be difficult if a child is vomiting etc.

Childminders can only have 3 under 5s usually, but can have extra school aged kids on top. They wouldn't need to charge you during the day for holding space as a place for a school aged child between 9 &3pm isnt one they can usually fill since children that age are at school.

Are you children poorly that often?

This is one of the reasons a large number of well educated women don't go back to careers full tilt after children - there isn't the flexibility in a lot of professional jobs to cater for caring responsibilities that might take you out of work at a moment's notice more than once in a blue moon. And there aren't good childcare options to plug the gaps.

Do you have a spare room? Could you look for some kind of semi-au pair type arrangement where they get board for free and you guarantee them x hours of paid work a month. If you don't them to use those hours looking after your kids then they do housekeeping instead?

I don't think a childminder on retainer will work as you want them to look after your kids when they're sick and most childminders would not want to mix sick kids with their own.

Unless your DC's needs are very specific and can't be managed by a competent and qualified stranger then the answer is an emergency nanny from an agency.

You'll pay through the nose for the times when you need them, but at least you'll only be paying for the times you do need them: you just need to budget a set amount for emergency child care each year.

To some extent I guess it depends where you live - you'll have much more choice in a big city.

My Mum used to come up on a days notice quite often. She's 150 miles away and our closest relative.
So we would do the drop everything and collect bit, but could often have childcare for the following few days (DS1 was most miffed when he got chicken pox a few weeks after his brother, and my Mum couldn't come up!).
In all honesty, by the time you've located a pick up person, and they've got there, it probably wouldn't be much quicker than traveling an hour yourself.

I’m in a less senior role with eight years of reciprocal goodwill built up in the bank.

Teacher here- this problem ranges across lots of professions not just ours. Our children have been unwell recently and my DH and I have split childcare between us. Yes, it isn't ideal being off school and yes cover is needed but that's the way it is. You can't expect someone else to look after poorly children.