To ask if this childcare model exists?

[PeopleWillAlwaysNeedPlates]

DH and I both teach - me part-time SLT and him full-time headteacher, which I mention only to explain that we are in jobs with almost zero flexibility in term time.

We have two primary-age DC, one of whom has some SEN and health needs. We use a brilliant childminder for wraparound care. Grandparents are very very supportive but 100+ miles away on both sides, so although they are very happy to help with planned childcare they can’t help with emergencies.

I have the opportunity to go for a new role but realistically to make it work we would need an extra element to our childcare, which I’m not sure exists - hence this post. We would need someone who would be willing to be available to pick up the children if, for example, they were unexpectedly unwell in school or to care for them on an ad hoc basis if they were poorly. I imagine we’d have to pay some kind of retainer and then an hourly / daily rate for any care provided?

Does such a thing exist? Most of my friends have grandparents locally enough not to need to pay for this kind of support. Another friend has a similar arrangement with a nanny / housekeeper but we can’t afford this.

We are allowed and it and we do take it but staff absence has been incredibly difficult to manage over the last two winters. DD's school had to send a whole class home for a week when their teacher got Covid and they couldn't staff it and it was sheer luck on our part that it wasn't her class. For my part I have picked up at least one, sometimes two, cover lessons in addition to my usual timetable pretty much every week so far this academic year.

We've been particularly unlucky with DS's illnesses this winter in addition to the routine medical appointments that he needs for chronic health issues and SEN and we currently make it work because I have worked very hard to build up eight years of goodwill at my current school, supporting colleagues when they are off to care for their own children or because they are ill. I want to move on with my career but I cannot give this up lightly or without exploring how I can shore up our support network.

Thanks so much for the creative ideas.

Teachers' pay and conditions does not specify any paid childcare days. There is technically no right to paid leave to care for dependants although like any job we can take statutory unpaid parental leave. Pay for ad hoc dependants' leave is at the discretion of the headteacher. I have never had pay withheld because I was absent caring for a child, however.

Have you thought of a term time nanny? Mine are just out of secondary school now but when they were small the cost of having a nanny versus the cost of two nursery places plus wraparound an emergency care came out to be much the same. The advantage is the nanny has them when they are ill and can collect from school. I know several nannies who have their own children who would love the idea of not needing to work during most of the school holidays

Considering taking time off for a dependant is a statutory right i am finding this thread incredibly depressing. The employer (whatever the sector!! Teachers/schools do not have the monopoly of 'pressure') should facilitate this and neither men nor women should suffer any detriment in terms of career progression from exercising their right.

Now if the kids have got health conditions that mean they are genuinely a lot more ill than the average child i get that it will be tough. Emergency nanny can help. There are various agencies for this. When it comes to pick up - if you're an hour away you're an hour away, school has to wait for a couple of hours so that you can make it. No big issue in my experience. Again schools need to accommodate that, it's pretty standard for both parents to be engaged during the day and not able to drop off everything straight away. Unless it's an actual emergency id expect any parent to reach the school within 2hours ish when called. Not within 10mins.

Do you have any scope with work from home with your new role if it’s non-teaching. I have found post pandemic there seems to be a lot more flex in my role re the odd day working at home while children are sick. I used to have to take annual leave. I still would if I needed to properly care for a child but I’ve had a few times when my older one has been happy to splodge in front of the tv all day on the sofa.

Last winter will most likely be one of the worst given all the exclusions/testing requirements. We had an awful winter with child sickness. I’m desperately hoping this year will be better.

I was lucky enough to have a neighbour whose two younger children (she has three) were the same age as my children.

I went back to work when my eldest started primary school, by which time the younger one was two and started at nursery. My husband and I both had a long commute (at least 1.5 hours each way) so there was no way we could get home quickly in an emergency.

My neighbour registered as a childminder solely so that she could look after my children before and after school/nursery (her children were at the same school and nursery). That arrangement continued until they started secondary school.

She was very flexible - if I was late (either because I had had to stay late or because the trains were delayed) she was happy to keep the children and always offered to feed them. She was also named as the first person for school/nursery to phone in an emergency and once did have to collect one of my children and take them to the minor injuries clinic when they had an accident at school.

It wasn't always possible, but as the children became older we tried to coordinate certain extra curricular activities like swimming lessons so my neighbour took them all at the same time.

It worked really well for both of us and 20 years on we have remained friends as well as neighbours!

We had a great local minder who would take our kids when they were a bit off - I wouldn’t send them day one of a bad illness but I would once they were on the mend and just needed TLC. They would sit on her sofa and watch tv same as home. Found her privately. We had a set rate for after school and then a separate rate for extra days like that.

Take unpaid time off then

Yes. It's one of the reasons why the role appeals. I will also be able to manage DS's appointments and the various assemblies / parent workshops which are starting up again.

I'm really hoping that last winter is as bad as it will get. We barely had a week where there wasn't a health-related issue and both school and childminder were (understandably) twitchy about every cough. DS is now on inhalers which will hopefully help to manage things when he catches colds, and we've also managed to get chickenpox over and done with in the last few months!

I'm a doctor and a single parent. When mine were younger I had a nanny. It wouldn't have been manageable any other way. Are head teachers really not paid enough to afford a nanny?

The other thing I've done, always, is as many favours for other people as I possibly can, so when I need help there are plenty of people willing to offer it.

Have you asked on the class WhatsApp if anyone knows if someone looking for this sort of role? Or the neighbourhood WhatsApp? I’ve seen some quite specific needs / requirements get matched up that way.

If not, would someone to clean and do school pick up a couple of days, plus a retainer for sick days, work out? That’s my arrangement, minus the sick days bit, as I can usually wfh.

Would anything like this help? My DCs are grown up, but I shudder when I think back to those days.

Sorry if you already know about it or it’s already been mentioned. I haven’t used the service myself.

www.emergencychildcare.co.uk

Best of luck, OP. It’s tough. x

I don't think it is depressing. Working parents need childcare and I'm not ashamed of that. I find it incredibly helpful to have these conversations in a forum like this because as I've mentioned the vast majority of my friends either have at least one parent in a flexible role or rely very heavily on family support. If I had realised this before I had children we probably would have settled somewhere else but we are where were are.

What is quite striking is the realisation that the systemic issue of a lack of affordable, flexible childcare and correspondingly flexible employers is being covered by the enormous sticking plaster of free grandparent care.

What i meant is that employers should be flexible as a given and employees should assert their rights. Emergency time off is a right. You shouldn't need to worry about it beside the obvious 'lets make sure my kid is ok'. Of course working parents need childcare. I work full time and I have 4 kids and no family around. So disruption will happen. My employers (and my husband's employers) over the years have dealt with it. We are both in professional roles.
By the same token schools should be realistic. I've never promised to school to be there within 10mins. I'll get there when I get there.

You are 100% correct with this

What is quite striking is the realisation that the systemic issue of a lack of affordable, flexible childcare and correspondingly flexible employers is being covered by the enormous sticking plaster of free grandparent care

Teaching is no different to many other jobs. Both senior NHS clinicians here and we just have to manage it. Take turns, whoever has the least important work on etc. The only difference being that other jobs mean you have to do it for around 46 weeks of the year rather than 40 weeks that teachers need to.
All the teachers I know seem to claim to be indispensable but in reality all of them can and do take time off when needed for emergencies or sick.

@Hobbitfeet32 when you are off work with your sick child (rightly so) who covers your clinic? Your patients? What happens to then that day?

My childminder has collected my daughter from school once when she was poorly, as she could get there quicker
I'd ask the CM first or a SAHM/D maybe one of your kids friends parents

Oh for goodness’ sake, it’s not a competition. I have not suggested for a moment that teaching is any different from many other jobs. I only mentioned my sector because it’s my thread about my life.

@Whatelsecouldibecalled I would finish the patients that were in the immediate clinic whilst trying to see if anyone could relieve me. Any that might not have travelled already would be cancelled or rearranged or frantically shuffled round into other slots.
It can be a real challenge. I’m lucky that I also have a good network of friends that might be willing to help and I also help them out when I can sharing lifts/play dates etc.

I provide ad hoc childcare but there's no way I'd do this for a sick child. If I and my family catch it I'd lose all other income for a long time by the time it had worked it's way through us (there's 6 of us!)

Who is realistically going to want to have your children if they have sickness and diarrhoea for example? Plus surely if a child is very poorly they would want one of their parents at home with them?

My previous employer offered 5 days free emergency nanny cover as a company perk. What it meant in practice is that you could have the nanny entertain your poorly child while you carried on working remotely in the next room (because who would leave their child with a nanny they had never met before when they were poorly, unless you had absolutely no choice?!).

the nannies were fantastic, could be booked with just a few hours notice and all in all it was a very helpful perk. The cost would have been £200 per day if I had paid it for it myself, which is a lot but not wholly unreasonable if you only needed it 3-4 days per year.

I'd look into a local babysitter (I'm sure some retirees must do this) or emergency nanny.

It's not an easy situation, we don't have GP's help either.

I don't think a pretend granny exists which is what you're after. You ask them to keep them at the school until you can get there.

I'm a single parent and I work up to 2 hours away from home. The school didn't like it very much if they called to collect when I was miles away but I developed a thick skin. I guess you know how to do that already if you're a teacher!