If your husband cheated would you/have you stayed?

[MsDynamite]

DH of 17 years has been having an affair since July time. I’ve spoken to a lot of people as it’s not my shame to carry but it seems lots have got through it or gone through similar. Just looking for answers in the yes/no form. For context I found out in September about the July affair and we agreed to work past, and he went back to her in December without my knowledge again. I’ve just recently found out again.

I stayed. It was a mistake. I wouldn't do it again.

“The Italians have a Proverb, ‘He that deceives me once, its his fault; but if twice, its my fault.'”

I've offered an open relationship to my husband and he turned the offer down. If he cheated after that... well I'd probably stay but I'd torment him about it since he could easily have avoided the deception without any judgement from me.

BTW he's not a good Dad. Good dads don't cheat on and break the hearts of the mothers of their children, because the upset ultimately hurts them as well.

👏

For various reasons I stayed, I’m not the same person anymore and I struggle.
my confidence and self esteem has literally shrivelled up and died.
please don’t be me

A drunken one off, I would try to forgive. A sustained affair, no way.

I'm not sure I could stay the first time as I would never trust him again but definitely not the second time, it suggests no remorse and very little respect for you. You deserve better