Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

MIL names her cat after our son

261 replies

JKT007 · 01/05/2022 02:05

Am I being unreasonable thinking it's very odd that my MIL named her kitten the same name as our son, her grandson?

OP posts:
Mothership4two · 02/05/2022 19:57

Voted YANBU but it is kind of funny

CleansUpButWouldPreferNotTo · 02/05/2022 20:01

That is a bit weird - I'd give DS a nickname, and see if the kitten acquires the same nickname - if it does, then call MIL out about it.

edenhills · 02/05/2022 20:10

My mum did this! She gave her new cat my name shortly after I had my first child. It was all very odd. She made a big deal about it like she wanted me to make a fuss but I just ignored it. The cat sadly died after about a year which is something your mil might want to think about as my mum felt even sadder burying a cat with her child's name.

LimoncelloMadness · 02/05/2022 20:11

Baffled by all the many posts trying to justify this and pretend it's reasonable. Let's face it, it's really fucking weird!

a1poshpaws · 02/05/2022 20:15

I think it's a high compliment. But then I rate cats far more highly than kids.

Seriously, I've had dogs, horses, pigs, chickens, sheep and cats with human names all my life - think Jack, Jane; Becky; Rosie; Bess; Jed; Harry; Elsie and so on. And my own name is apparently a very popular one amongst Golden Retrievers.

Don't sweat the small things.

Diverseopinions · 02/05/2022 20:20

YorkshireRog It doesn't harm the child, for sure, so no big deal, but it is weird that all the associations connected with the name of her dear grandson can be invested in a cat.

Usually, we like to have one name only among our children....the first name ( not so much middle name ) is special and becomes imbued with a sense of their special personality. How could someone think to do this....

If nothing else, it's a fascinating conundrum for amateur psychologists. ...what can it be all about? What is she thinking of? My sister called her cat by the name of my cat, and I thought that that was odd and unimaginative, but this is something else, and I can't believe a real psychologist wouldn't find it fascinating.

But the best thing about this is nothing to do with the oddness, but rather OP's kind and wonderful response that her MIL is much loved and she would never embarrass her. What a thoughtful, generous lady.

SuzyQ12 · 02/05/2022 20:22

I'd take this as a compliment, if anything. Wouldn't bother me at all.

Rottweilermummy · 02/05/2022 20:23

Yanbu
Mils have weird habits to test us sometimes , I do have good relationship with mine BTW,
I thought this might make you feel a bit better, my new DH , bought a puppy when we were first dating and wanted to call it same name as me!! Needless to say I chose a better name lol

ddl1 · 02/05/2022 20:23

It somewhat depends on the name. If it's a common name (Sam, Jack, Oliver) or one with some association with cats (Felix) it might be coincidence. In any case, I wouldn't worry; if she's a cat-lover this might be a compliment.

Rosiebean17 · 02/05/2022 20:26

My ex MIL named her new kitten the same name as a dog we'd owned. Thing was, the dog had to be rehomed and we were devastated and less than a month later she called said kitten the same name.
Same MIL used to also call up and cry if ex DH said we had plans together too at the time of said plans. She still sends me odd text messages several years since divorce which is another story 😆
That said, it gives me my creepy ex MIL vibes so for that reason I've voted as not unreasonable.

Hepzibar · 02/05/2022 20:29

LimoncelloMadness · 02/05/2022 20:11

Baffled by all the many posts trying to justify this and pretend it's reasonable. Let's face it, it's really fucking weird!

Agree.
Utterly bizarre to name an animal after your only grandchild, or any grandchild.
What on earth is she thinking.

Hutchy16 · 02/05/2022 20:35

thats what you get when you name your son mr mittens

Whenthegoatcomesin · 02/05/2022 20:43

It’s weird. For sure. My first thought would be what is she trying to tell us.

Mariposista · 02/05/2022 20:46

Are the cat and your son called Felix? or Max? Popular names for both cats and boys (and lovely names too).
Whatever the name is, this is quite sweet. She obviously thinks you have good taste, as she clearly loves the kitty.

ChardonnaysBeastlyCat · 02/05/2022 20:48

My cousin names their child after my then dog.

Was I bitter? Nah!

autumncrisp · 02/05/2022 20:50

This may be outting but I don't care. When I was pregnant with our youngest child I absolutely loved the name Oliver for a boy. My mils dogs name is Ollie. My husband was having none of it. I held my ground and didn't give a shit. I was determined but ended up having a girl so names her Olivia. It's just a name.

Mumwithbaggage · 02/05/2022 20:54

My SIL named her daughter after the cat that had been run over! Normal name (for a child) just seemed a bit odd to me.

mumda · 02/05/2022 21:02

Point out if something happens to the cat she'll regret naming it after your child.

'bobby got run over'
'bobby's dead'
'bobby died of old age'
Etc.

Pipsquiggle · 02/05/2022 21:09

Hi OP I think you or your DH need to chat with your MIL as she just may not realise how much it annoys her.

We got a puppy when I was growing up. We wanted to call him Jack. When we told my Gran she asked us not to call him that name as that was the nickname for Grandad (who had been dead for nearly 20 years).

We called the dog Zack

Pipsquiggle · 02/05/2022 21:13

*it annoys you

Also, Gran was fine with Zack

Booboobagins · 02/05/2022 21:13

When my kids were little (esp my son) every pet we bought was named after him. Goldfish, guinea-pig, rabbit....

I'd offer alternatives but he'd insist they had his name.

Maybe your MIL knows thats what her DGS would want too? Then again maybe she's doing it cos she loves him so much, so when he's nit with her she can still call his name and tge cat will come to her.

I thunk its a bit odd, but it's likely to be done with innocent reason unless you're not talking to her, then I might be suspicious....

BluebellField · 02/05/2022 21:20

It is strange but nice.

There's worse things in the world than a grandparent who loves her grandchild.

VenusClapTrap · 02/05/2022 21:37

Yeah it’s weird. I would definitely get your Dh to ask her why.

steppemum · 02/05/2022 21:40

I think it is pretty weird.

I would have put a comment on the FB post:

😂yeah right, you just named the kitten after your GRANDSON. Did you forget that was his name? ha ha. nice try.

then see her reaction.
Of course if she is serious, you then say - come on, you're not really going to name your cat after your grandson are you? and repeat that in various forms several times.
She will then realise it is weird and change the name.

MdNdD · 02/05/2022 21:43

Rather odd - I find it odd and a little weird that she named the kitten the same as your baby. It would make me feel a little unnerved whether it was my mum or MiL or sister, etc…

But, I wanted to name our first son the same as MiL’s dog, purely because I liked the name. The dog was a really nice dog. I think I’m my practical mind, the dog was already old and wasn’t going to be around for much longer, in fact maybe he had already died, I can’t remember.

But my don’t father said no way, that’s the dog’s name.

so, yes, it is unsettling, but hey, I wanted to do the reverse!! Go figure…