Would you hire a male babysitter?

[georgarina]

Why/why not?

That’s about access- most people don’t let just anybody watch their children- if they did I imagine the stats for abuse would be more representative of such

"The OP used the words ‘hire’ and ‘babysitter’."

Personally if I were to use a babysitting service then I would expect the company/person to be subjet to background checks/have references etc. Assuming all that was in place I would not reject a male sitter out of hand.

Plus the mental impact on the men who work as primary school teachers, in nurseries or baby sit for friends and family when so many people are looking at them thinking 'paedophile'.

I wonder how any of the people saying 'no way' would feel if their teen DS was unable to get a baby sitting job like his older sister did because people operated a blanket 'no way' policy or assumed they had ulterior motives.

That’s your choice. My choice would be to not use a male babysitter to minimise the risk to my children.

That's because males make up 50% of the population. If you looked at terrorism and normalised for the small amount of the population they make up you would find a specific religious group that Mumsnet doesn't allow comment on so I'm not naming would be equally disproportionately problematic letting have paid employment in the security services like males and sex offences (it doesn't help that some sex offences cannot be committed by women like rape because they name penis) are problematic in the childcare sector. We do not and should not allow either to be discriminated against unless you allow discrimination against a wide range of things. I would settle to either allow discrimination against women men or religious or racial groups or not but not this stupid mix and match discrimination that seems so prevalent on Mumsnet at the moment.

so called ‘checks’ mean nothing. You could be a convicted sex offender and have a valid DBS certificate.

@BarbaraofSeville but that’s the fault of men. They need to get their house in order if they don’t want to be mistrusted.

Well said, at least there is some normality out here.

I have no words for you, good way to blame others for your own prejudice against the opposite sex. 😣

Yep.
💯

No.
💯

Not in a million years. I know it's a sad state of affairs but I'm not risking that with my kids, not when I was told on a training course that 1 in 4 kids is sexually abused.

Do you think men discuss with other men about what they can do as a whole to help people build trust in them? Nah. They just say, "it's not our fault that some men do bad things, so it's unfair that we are all treated with suspicion."

Being honest? I am too familiar with shitbag seemingly decent male sex offenders to be entirely happy with it and I have no way of knowing if that lovely local man who does kind deeds in the neighbourhood can actually be trusted alone with my kids or not, so the only way I’d do it is if I had a home cam in the bedroom. I’d tell the sitter that it’s on and explain we use it to check on DC without going into the room and disturbing them. That’s my way of saying if you touch my child, I’ll break your legs. It’s sad that I need to do this, but I’m unfortunately on red alert.

The risk isn’t huge. The risk is tiny. The consequences are huge but the risk isn’t.

😕

Yes, better keep those standards low.

Yes, I would not bar someone from looking after my children on the basis of their gender and I'm extremely surprised at the number who would. I have used local teenage boys as well as girls to babysit, and my son has done some babysitting. When I was part of a babysitting circle, then sometimes the husband would babysit instead of the wife. I've let my father and BILs look after our children. There have been young men working at after school clubs we have used and (occasionally, a long time ago) at the nursery when they were babies. I have never given it a second thought to be honest.

Did they also teach you about statistical fallacy?

Never. The only male I allow unattended contact with my DD is DH.

As many others have said. I would only use someone I know & trust be it male or female. Luckily I have a teenage son who is willing to babysit. He also babysits for a few of our friends & neighbour's so people will & do hire a male babysitters

By who? I don't really want to google % of children sexually abused but I do know that in the vast majority of cases the abusers are people known to the family and children. It's not going to be babysitters who have gone through extensive background checks.

Wow I didn't really read many replies but now I have. Wow as the mother of a teenage boy this is a depressing read.

It's not depressing. I also have a son. People want to safeguard their kids, and it's a fact that males are more likely to abuse kids than females. It's nothing personal against your son.

Maybe, depends on who it is.
As an aside, children are far more likely to be abused by people the parents know and trust. So those saying "only close friends" etc should remain alert and wary.