AIBU to never allow scooters in residential area again?

[Anotherdayanotherpark2020]

My nearly 3 year old was a whisker away from being hit on the way back from school run today. Threw up when I got home. He's fast at scooting and goes a little way( 3-4 houses) ahead. Always always stays on the path and walks across quiet road with me. Today this car reversed straight off the drive in 1 go and missed him by a whisker on the path. Drove off and didn't acknowledge. Obviously looked once, assumed he'd stop/ was slow or didn't see him at all I don't know but didn't slow or check again and properly zoomed out. They had good visibility to the side we were approaching. He'd have been seriously injured at least if hit. I can't even think about it. Thank fuck he had his helmet on.

I asked why he didn't stop when I yelled and he said " I did stop but the brake isn't that quick. I was on the path, why didn't the car stop?" I just said he couldn't ever ride his scooter outside of a park again and carried him home in a state. His older brother has said he's not riding his scooter by houses ever again as it was scary to see :-(. I feel as I can only control my children not drivers this is the safest thing to do. It feels such a shame though. I don't even want to let them run on the pavement anymore :-(. Was I just being a really shit parent by allowing scooting or running in a quiet street on paths? My husband thinks it's the driver's fault and says just one of those things but I'm too scared to do anything other than slow walking holding hands with both......

@Testingprof the actual manoeuvre when there is nothing opposite or behind me takes 10 seconds, regardless of if its in or out. I can't complete the reversing manoeuvre IN if my way is blocked by a car directly behind me and the bus parked opposite which reduces the turning circle. It's not that hard to see the difference surely? I can wait on my drive with no problem until the road and path is clear. I can't do that when in the road so sometimes I swing in forwards.

I think the problem really is that we don't have sufficient space/facilities for scooting and biking for little kids in general. A street with multiple driveways is too dangerous for the reason that you have encountered. Particularly near rush hour.

There are lots of places where it is dangerous for children to be when they are not closely supervised by adults, scooting or not. Building sites, railway lines, canal paths, car parks, escalators, cliff edges, quarries, farmyards , we live in a world which is hostile towards small children with breakable bodies, that’s why parents have to assess potential hazards and act appropriately, not look on fondly and expect a two year old child to recognise and respond to dangerous situations.

It's annoying when kids are on their scooters on the pavement.

I wouldn't let mine do that and I wouldn't let mine be running three to four houses ahead of me. Way too far at that age.

Whether or not it's the driver's fault is neither here nor there, if your child had been injured, you're the one who has to deal with the fallout.

It's not that hard to see the difference surely? I can wait on my drive with no problem until the road and path is clear. I can't do that when in the road so sometimes I swing in forwards

I have the same circumstance as you. I can rarely reverse in because I can't get into the correct position due to oncoming traffic and cars behind blocking my drive when I stop. Reversing is simple as I can simply wait until the road is clear.

I too don't see why that's difficult to understand.

Reversing out, I meant

Gosh I can be lax but I wouldn’t let my 3 year old more than a couple of feet ahead of me anywhere other than a park.

For some reason, using scooters seems to be the trendy thing to allow DCs to do on the school run around here. I have seen numerous kids getting too close to the road or not stopping whilst their mums are shouting.
Aside from that, the thundering of a scooter behind you on a pavement makes you wince for your ankles.

Quite simply, small children of that age are too young to realise the dangers when so engrossed in the fun of it, and small children can easily be visually missed when reversing etc.

Yes but we have deliberately chosen to create neighbourhoods in which children have to live alongside moving heavy machinery operated by the general public.

Do kids scooters have brakes? Mine didn't - you stopped using a dragging foot!

if it was an electric scooter.... well...

@Wheniruletheworld
A brake over the rear wheel yes- it slows to a stop within a meter or so if going at high speeds- the main issue here was the speed he goes.

A few mums asked why he wasn't on his scooter yesterday so I explained what happened. They essentially said it sounded scary but was a shame not to let the kids run ahead anymore. Said everyone does it- don't let one idiot limit him. I do think it's a high enough risk that it's not worth it though.

So I'm compromising by running with him and my eldest atm...... Need to invest in a supportive bra though lol

And many of the owners of the “heavy machinery” are the very parents of the children who want to scoot, and in addition their parents are ordering deliveries, expecting their rubbish to be collected, and often parking their “heavy machinery” at the kerb so restricting the view both of the child and other road users. The days when children could play safely in the street are long gone, they won’t be returning. It needs accommodation on both sides, but while car drivers have a duty and responsibility to drive with care and attention to other road users and pedestrians it will always be the parents duty to assume responsibility for their child’s safety, and in this case the parent was remiss in their duty and is lucky not to be sitting by a hospital bed.

I think some future generation will look back on the way we allow 18 year olds operate heavy machinery alongside toddlers with the danger disgust with which we look at kids working with spinning jennys in the 1700s.

*same disgust, not danger disgust

And if it was a person coming out of their driveway, not a car, your small child flying along the pavement on a scooter could cause them a serious injury.

In all honesty, I think a lot of people are a bit blasé with toddlers on scoters and balance bikes. I’ve seen so many 2yos speeding ahead in areas where cars coming out of drives could easily hit them. I’ve never liked doing both of mine at a time and never felt safe pushing a buggy while my eldest was on a scooter or bike. Safe ‘risk’ is good but I do think there is a bit of a trend for two much two soon with 2/3 year olds (in a complete opposite way to other things where kids often lack freedoms).

I'm at a loss. So 2020s parenting is now giving 2 year olds the responsibility of having road sense. They are highly trained in recognising reversing lights and engine noise etc. They are virtually sensible enough to pass a driving test.

For Fuck's Sake.

A 2 year old doesn't yet know which way is up. Get a grip, mother.

I live on residential road and often have to drive on to my drive depending on which way I approach from. When I reverse off I always always go at a snails pace so I'm prepared to stop for any unseen hazards. And if pedestrians are in the vicinity, particularly with kids who's impulses can be completely unpredictable, I wait until they have passed me before I continue to reverse. This is absolutely my responsibility. There is never a need to shoot off the driveway, if the driver had been looking, or had hazard perception and wasn't in such a hurry then there would never have been a near miss. The only way we can change just how many deaths and injuries occur on our roads is to have all sense of entitlement removed from motorists.

YABU, when my kids were young if they ran off/scooted off/rode off in front of me they had to stop at the edge of each driveway for me to catch up and we would cross together. This stopped when each entered Year 5 unless they had younger siblings with them as it’s not workable to allow some to cross and some not. Even at that point if in bike or scooter I made them come to an absolute stop at the edge of each driveway, double check and then go, not just ride straight across while looking at the same time. I’m sure the constant stop/start was annoying for them but who cares.

Read the comment from the others mothers asking why yours wasn't on their scooters. Are they a bit daft?
You really can't see a tiny child near a car especially speeding on a scooter. He was likely in their blind spot.
I backed over one of my DC bicycles by accident when he was about 8.
It was dropped right behind the car so of course I didn't see it. Thankfully I was creeping along so it wasn't damaged much.

I don't know if you've seen this but it helps see where children's cognitive development are. It's pretty interesting.

www.simplypsychology.org/piaget.html

Hi all

Yes I have seen that @RantyAunty - it's very interesting I agree. I have a background in child psychology so know a fair bit about it. All children are different and can be developing aspects from more than one stage at a time.

@EggBurger
Bit rude considering you don't know my child. This discussion isn't about his developmental stage so I don't need to justify his knowledge/ abilities to you. I never said anything about giving him responsibility for road sense anyway.

I asked whether I was being unreasonable to stop him scooting in residential areas after a near miss.

I asked what may seem a silly question on here because it is very common to do this in our area and I was second guessing whether I was being sensible to stop allowing or over protective and should just slow him down........