To hate the drinking culture in the UK?

[newjerseyp]

I despair of the drinking culture in the UK. Everything revolves around alcohol. I go to a dinner party - alcohol first, food plus alcohol, dessert plus alcohol, then more alcohol to finish. Sunny day? Let's go to a beer garden! Catch up with friends? Let's meet for a drink (usually alcohol). BBQs I see more people drinking alcohol than actually eating. Alcohol is used to celebrate (birthdays, graduations etc) and commiserate (funerals). It's very hard to avoid. Every occasion I go to I instantly get asked, 'are you having a drink?'

Yesterday (Sunday) about 75 percent of my friends were hungover. I was trying to make plans to go out a walk and most of the replies were 'had too much to drink last night'. Of course you could go to these things and just not drink but then you have to explain yourself and the temptation is there and it's also boring being surrounded by tipsy/drunk people when sober.

Alcohol is second to cigarettes as the biggest killer, even before illegal drugs yet it is so normalised and glamourised in society and there doesn't seem to be much incentive outlined by the government to change this.

AIBU to just hate it?

I would rather have the drinking culture you describe than this crazy culture where school kids speak in gangster slang . I mean why? It is so awful to hear. I just don't understand it.

It's pretty high consumption here in Denmark- as well as expensive, if you drink outside of the home, (cheap if you drink at home- cheaper than UK) but you do see far less drunken gangs- and certainly less drunk young women.

Yep alcohol and cakes. And I don't like coffee either. Going out for a bad cuppa tea sucks. I'm diabetic, type 2 so diet controlled, so it all sucks. So drinking way too much watery pump Diet Coke.

I think it's changing, if slowly. The solution - don't go out as often with these people. Or, find new hobbies / friends. Do things in the day. Or plan socialising carefully (walk then pub lunch, then home) to avoid it more. I enjoy a beer or two at home a couple of times a week, but can't keep up with my friends when they are on one! (End up under the table).

Agreed. I've recently had to give up drinking because it really affects my mental health. My new partner is a dream but all my friends still know me as a drinker and it's really difficult to negotiate. I literally only need 1 drink and I'm done. I think if it wasn't for other people I would be teetotal.

Some are, some aren’t. But alcohol is pushed in our culture and promoted at every turn. From an early age we are told that alcohol is for celebrating, to “wet the babies head”, toasts at weddings, for funerals, Christmas morning drinks! Then the hideous “mummy needs wine” baby gro and Memes and the “it’s 5 o’clock somewhere in the world tee hee! Time for a cheeky wine” Facebook statuses etc it’s kind of no wonder we’ve all been brainwashed into thinking you can’t have a good time without it.

cigarettes used to be the same- promoted to look cool, in films, on tv, - we even had fake cigarette sweets as a kid until it was proven that they caused lung cancer. Alcohol is the same.

I don’t deny any of that.
However when I didn’t drink for a few years, my friends were nothing but supportive. I can’t imagine them ‘pushing’ alcohol on to me, making sarky comments or getting angry. If they did, they wouldn’t be my friends.

Don’t moan about it. Get some different friends.

drinking culture much less pervasive than it was.

but even by previous standards your social circle sounds hardcore.

I agree OP.
I hate alcohol. Everything about it.
I hate that some people can’t do anything or go anywhere without having a drink.
People don’t realise how irritating they are when they’ve had a drink. The only people who think everyone is having a great time are the people who are also drinking.

Before anyone says I’m a killjoy I have seen two people die young as a result of their own alcohol abuse and another two people die at the hands of alcohol abusers.
I have also seen the effect alcohol has had on people’s MH generally.
I hate it.

I'm 42 and for the last 2-3 years have hugely downscaled. To the point where I've gone 4 months alcohol free currently. I really regret how much booze I've consumed in my life and just pray it's not caused significant long term harm.

I'm 42 and for the last 2-3 years have hugely downscaled. To the point where I've gone 4 months alcohol free currently. I really regret how much booze I've consumed in my life and just pray it's not caused significant long term harm. I want to be here - and healthy - for my DC.

Very pleased to hear how the culture seems to be changing and young people are not as steeped in drink culture as I was growing up (90s/early 00s). Perhaps this will have a positive effect on crime rates.

Sorry for double post!

I really don’t think the drinking culture is less pervasive than it was. It’s become acceptable to drink at home alone to excess. It’s promoted as being essential to having a good time in nearly all situations.
Most people have no idea what is a safe amount and what is totally excessive.
I know three women who drink on their own to cope with stress. None of them would think they have a problem but they definitely do. They can’t cope without it.
I know a family where every one of them drinks excessively. They then brawl and fall out. This is habitual behaviour. It’s viewed as amusing by those who know them.

I think there’s a direct correlation between social media and smartphones becoming prevalent and people (especially younger), drinking less. I think it probably started when it was apparent how quickly any photos of being hammered would appear and potentially go viral online.

I agree op and I don't understand it. Why deliberately poison yourself? But then I guess the same can be said for all the other crap we put into our systems, e.g. sugar and other dodgy chemicals?
The effects of alcohol in excess are so depressing though.
I used to drink alcohol occasionally then just stopped when I realised I don't actually like the taste or effect. I don't miss it. Now if only I could do the same with sugar...

YANBU, I was literally wading through drunk men and tottering women on Saturday.

The stink of piss and beer was everywhere, with men lining up against walls to piss.

i really hope those women got home safe.

I am 29 too and don't drink. I literally get drunk after 1 pint of beer. And I have no wish to vomit on myself on the tube (this happened to me after my first work Christmas party). It's not fun, I don't know why people drink themselves silly. Crawling into the bathtub to wash yourself clean of your own vomit has to be a new low, as is scrubbing the vomit off your backpack.i also get Asian flush so that's not the effect I want after applying my makeup.

I don't judge other people's drinking but having been sober for a few years now (after drinking heavily in my teens, 20s and early 30s), I do feel like I wish I could share the feeling of being liberated from the need to drink as I've found it very eye opening. I used to love drinking but now love not drinking - but then I am a very either/or sort of personality, and also had a problematic relationship with alcohol, so I know my experience won't match that of the majority of people who can just enjoy a drink unproblematically!

I haven't rtft but noticed a few comments about age. I'm in my late 30s and don't have any friends/peers who are heavy drinkers, haven't for a long time now. My partner is mid-40s and almost all his friends and peers are heavy drinkers. There definitely feels like a generational gap but it's also down to lots of other factors such as lifestyle, relationship or family situation, job etc. I haven't noticed a decline in drinking among my friends and colleagues in their 40s and 50s, or my parents (and other family) in their 60s and 70s. I have, though, noticed that a lot of younger colleagues don't drink at all (which makes me feel like less of an outlier) - very different from my experience of being at their stage in life when everyone I knew drank a lot.

Hic

I'm in Scotland

I drank a lot going out with friends in my teens 15-19 then was too busy with too much work to really drink much in my 20s but if I did go out it was a huge night ( maybe every once few months ). Had babies in my 30s so didn’t drink much - always pregnant or had young babies. Hit my 40s and started to drink wine while preparing dinners, supervising homework and reading coupled with the boredom and feeling inadequate of being a stahm things got bad quickly. Lots of boozy nights with the school Mums - ( every school function has a bar)and even more drinking at home, every social occasion was a excuse for lots of wine. Ended up in AA when it became unmanageable with a nice group of nice women all in the same predicament. Lost a lot of friends when I gave up alcohol and now I don’t really see anyone except close friends that know. Social situations really suck now and I try to avoid them at all costs. I do notice the alcohol culture is a huge thing in my age group with us older Mums.

If one of my friends invited me to go for a walk and another friend suggested going to a beer garden, I know which one I’d chose. So I guess YANBU. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Scotland’s alcohol consumption is extremely high. And drug use. I’m not sure why it’s such a problem there.

I don't disagree about the binge drinking culture and the impact on health and crime rates but there is something about pub culture that is quintessentially British and is being lost. These old country pubs or working men's bars in towns that started closing en masse following the smoking ban and this has continued. I realise the smoking ban was very much a good thing and long overdue but I do mourn the loss of this part of British history and I do try to support my local pubs because they are a hub of the community, a place to meet and enjoy life. There's no need to get bladdered, I hardly drink alcohol at all these days. The culture around alcohol isn't all bad.

I like going for walks but I also enjoy a nice afternoon in a beer garden catching up with friends. There's space in my life for both.