To buy this to deter people from turning up unannounced?

[HelpfulAlex]

Very lighthearted, but how brilliant is this?! Lol - popped up on my FB feed.

I just can't get my head around family and friends having to make an appointment to visit.

It's just basic manners.

It's rude to turn up at someone's home and expect them to be available to entertain you.

Why can't you text and say "I'm in the area, are you free for coffee?" first?

I saw this on another thread, but don't see how that could really work. Especially in the height of the summer when they wouldn't even need a coat.
And if the unwanted visitor went back to their car say, and didn't drive off immediately would the friend have to actually leave the house to keep up the 'act'.
Less hassle just to let them in IMO, but then I am one of those weirdos that would let visitors in even if they'd not made an appointment 6 months previously. If it's wasn't convenient I would just tell them. Imagine that!

So YABVU because the sign is wrong and stupid

I'm afraid that was my first thought (without the "V").

Reminds me of a t-shirt I saw once that said:
"Everyone has the right to be stupid but your abusing the privilege".

At one time, "socially awkward" people ended up languishing in asylums.

There also seems to be a disproportionately large number of socially awkward people on mumsnet.

The number of people who refuse to answer the door or phone without a written appointment three weeks in advance on MN is ridiculous IMO.

It's rude to turn up at someone's home and expect them to be available to entertain you.

If family or friends call on me I don't think they are expecting to be "entertained". If I'm doing something I can't stop they are welcome to chat while I carry on - but I think society has come to a sad state when it's too much trouble to sit and chat for half an hour. I find the attitude of those complaining about visitors far more rude!

I agree. I think the people that just answer the door/let the visitors in as is normal just don't bother posting maybe?

There also seems to be a disproportionately large number of socially awkward people on mumsnet.

Yep.

No one ever comes to visit me, known or otherwise. So I don’t have that problem but it would be nice to have visitors but yes I’d like some notice to hoover etc make the place habitable lol

Phones have existed for about a century...

I remember saying how ridiculous it was to add a camera onto phones! How wrong was I 😂- Totally love it now! Sometimes even think about going as far as getting a selfie stick as it’s so hard to take a good one if my DH isn’t also there with his long, long arms 📸

Not socially awkward, just busy and it's rude to just turn up and assume someone has nothing better to do than see you.

Why would you set off in the direction of someone's home without even considering that it might not be convenient for them? Are you that self absorbed?

Not really the same. Having one person SAH was more common and life was a lot slower. These days people's lives are choka and down time is a luxury that has to be carved out sometimes. It's rude these days to just show up at the bloody door.

Um yes.... is that not kind of obvious. Have you thought why so many of us are online so much 🤣.

I hate droppers in too. I don't think I would so much if like my mum/nan I was literally just going through the days chores and had all the time in the world and whatever job could just wait til later. But when we're fitting in kids activities and and work we're usually just off somewhere or just come in and need time to decompress.

I loved poppers in at uni. Absoluteky hate it now. My dad and his wife have started doing it and I really resent it.

If it was a friend I'd feel bad I dont jave long and would rather they arranged to come pver for a coffee properly.

I think texting/whatsapp has removed the need for 5min popping in to catch up.

(Yesterday I was thinking about postcards too . My kids dont need to send a postcard to friends as theyve sent the odd photo already! )

My mum is the most loud, confident person ever. She talks to everyone she meets, cannot talk at normal volume. And she's not tolerate people dropping by unannounced (depending on who they are).

Usually people with nothing better to do, who are happy for people to drop in at all hours. If you're working, have kids, or are doing something it can be inconvenient and annoying.

I always say on these threads that if you don't like people turning up unannounced at your house don't whatever you do ever have a teenager.😬

Why's that? I have three.

I'm not sure it'd work. I once saw a doormat which said GO AWAY in large letters on it. I'd love uninvited guests to descend on me. Even if I was in the middle of the ironing or vacuuming I'd put it aside with a 'bugger that' comment and put the kettle on. We're all different.

Because if mine were anything to go by there was a steady stream of visitors and I wasn't aware they were coming, but we let them in because it was sociable and nice? Wouldn't want my DC to think that their friends had to book an appointment.

Standing visitors are the worst.
They won’t come in but they stand on your doorstep talking for half an hour.
All the heat is going into the street. Just come in or go away!

Because not everyone has a spare 30 minutes to sit and chat or feel up to doing so.

Some people seem to ignore that life has changed from what it was like for when they grew up. Many families have 2 working parents with child/children either at school/nursery. Kids have after school and extracurricular activities. More people also wfh and can’t just get up and have a chat.

Did it ever occur to the people who have such an issue with homeowners wanting you to notify them when you plan to come to their home that maybe the homeowners want to give you their full attention so you can both enjoy the time together instead of them having to look at the clock to make sure they can go back to whatever it is that they were doing or needed to do.

Texting wasn’t really a thing until my late teens, but I still remember as a child feeling awkward and embarrassed when my parents would just show up at families houses without calling first. I remember thinking they might not want visitors. Growing up, our house constantly had people dropping in all the time unexpectedly and I hated it. I hated the interruptions, having to stop what I was doing and sit and and talk to them (we weren’t allowed to just carry on with what we were doing) and hated that it would be first thing on a weekend morning and we weren’t allowed to sit in pyjamas and watch a bit of tv in case people popped in. I hate unannounced visitors as an adult, how hard is it to just send a text first?

My mom is the worst for it she’s been known to not text family members in advance as well because ‘otherwise they will just say their busy’. Why would you even want to visit people that you know don’t want you to?

But you don't have to sit and chat with your kids friends, not feed them, nor do they care if you tidied up. Completely different to somebody sipping tea and having to stop what you're doing for hours.

Oh dear. Seems I did parenting teens wrong. Too late now. I miss those days a bit.

Kids friends are in andnout here (although theyve usually texted) I have no problems with that.

If all I was doing was ironing or hoovering as per pp then no it wouldn't be a problem. But life isnt like that here - its usually "we have 40 mins before taking X to sport so need to get xyz done" of fitting in dinner after work. Etc!

Yes my teens friends are there to see them, not me and often it is prearranged and they are going out. Mine enjoy being out doing things rather than just mooching in the house so it doesn't really happen that a random teen just turns up. Again what if your teen was busy?