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Original poster

Just tried to watch the new Death on the Nile

170 replies

RozHuntleysLeftHand · 18/04/2022 17:55

What the fuck have they done to it?!

I really really wanted to enjoy it, huge fan of Agatha Christie, love French and Saunders.

From the start it's just too....... Sexy?.... For a Poirot?

None of it felt right.

I'm gonna try again later because I had to turn it off after about half an hour......but jesus.

OP posts:
PortiaFimbriata · 18/04/2022 19:03

I quite liked the sexy dancing because the chemistry between the three of them is such a key driver of the plot. The problem is that all the other characters were overshadowed.

I can't believe that we were expected to take French and Saunders seriously in a period drama.

Russell Brand was great, as he was in Despicable Me. Someone really needs to keep employing him in acting jobs to stop him doing other stuff.

Waitwhat23 · 18/04/2022 19:04

@CaliforniaDrumming

Why Didn't They Ask Evans is my least favourite Christie along with Mystery of the Blue Train, so feeling a bit wary of it.
My least favourite is Death in the Clouds because it's ridiculously obvious who did it! I remember not being the biggest fan of Mystery of the Blue Train though. I utterly hate the Harlequin ones - not a big fan of the woooo!

I have quite a few favourites though.

CaliforniaDrumming · 18/04/2022 19:05

By the way, Christie nerds, I just finished reading Poirot and Me by David Suchet. Totally recommend it. Awed by his homework on Poirot. To get Poirot's foppish walk right he put a penny between his bum cheeks.

Agree wt pp who said Suchet brought so much humanity and warmth to the role. Poirot is essentially a very kind man- endlessly muttering pauvre petite- and Suchet just exemplified that.

Asperia · 18/04/2022 19:06

It was all a bit 'KB stars as being KB, in KB's adaptation of KB's portrayal of himself...'

Why would you invite your ex, with whom you seem to have little interaction, on your honeymoon?? Just why?

CreepyDibillo · 18/04/2022 19:12

I was so disappointed, I could have cried. I love Poirot and thought Brannagh did a good job with Murder on the Orient Express (though will never, ever match Suchet). DOTN was just wrong from the offset. Great cast, but it got off on the wrong foot when Dendara was omitted from the story.

Butchyrestingface · 18/04/2022 19:16

Thank you, @RozHuntleysLeftHand. I hadn't realised it was out already and have literally got bought it to watch on Youtube RIGHT NOW.

I've always fancied the pants off Branagh. Like a fine Irn Bru, he improves with age. Be mine, be mine...

cobumbo1 · 18/04/2022 19:17

The boat & scenery was incredible tbf

PortiaFimbriata · 18/04/2022 19:18

@Asperia

It was all a bit 'KB stars as being KB, in KB's adaptation of KB's portrayal of himself...'

Why would you invite your ex, with whom you seem to have little interaction, on your honeymoon?? Just why?

They don't invite her, she gatecrashes.
Rhannion · 18/04/2022 19:21

I’m with you OP it was crap. Too much dirty dancing, too much playing around with the storyline, couldn’t take French & Saunders seriously, I think KB goes for “ novelty casting “ , poor script & some dire acting. The clothes and settings were stunning but it most certainly wasn’t Agatha Christie.
I bet KB will remake Evil Under the Sun next & ruin that too.

Asperia · 18/04/2022 19:23

I meant the doctor. Smile

Alwaystired99 · 18/04/2022 19:23

It's just awful. Looks impressive but is somehow very flat. Loads of unnecessary changes and nowhere near as good as the Ustinov version, or even the radio 4 play. Or the book obviously. I've no problem with some tweaks/ updating but Christie was one of a kind so STOP messing around with her characters and stories.
I wasted my time on it when I was off sick but sort of wished I hadn't bothered.

Rhannion · 18/04/2022 19:24

@Asperia

It was all a bit 'KB stars as being KB, in KB's adaptation of KB's portrayal of himself...'

Why would you invite your ex, with whom you seem to have little interaction, on your honeymoon?? Just why?

She gate crashed but the biggest question is where did she get the money? The whole plot was to get their hands on Linnet’s fortune. He didn’t fall in love with her, he and Jackie planned to kill her off from the first meeting.
Greenpictureframe · 18/04/2022 19:26

David suchet was just so perfect as poirot, noone else can be him for me. I dislike branaugh version, he made poirot gaudy and unlikeable and i hated the made up back story and the romance and getting rid of his moutache?!?! Absolutely not! I hated murder on the orient express too, which is gutting as I love that story and poirots development in it. Don't rate gal godot as much of an actress, I love poirot and Agatha Christies work in general, so it was disappointing.

lemongreentea · 18/04/2022 19:27

@cobumbo1

It's so weird, super glossy & glamorous but falls completely flat.
This is how I feel about it. Especially the weird dancing at the beginning.
SoggyPaper · 18/04/2022 19:29

The dancing at the start was awful.

Winniewonka · 18/04/2022 19:30

Huge Agatha Christie fan, I saw the first KB at the cinema and thought the first ten minutes were trying to emulate a James Bond film. Felt quite repulsed by the moustache on the big screen and thought the colour and styling of the film incredibly dull.
I don't know whether to watch this new one or not, at least everything won't be larger than life on my TV.

Chrysanthemum5 · 18/04/2022 19:31

I hated it - it was so boring. The original story is brilliant but this was such a waste. The sexy dancing at the start was awful, then linnet sitting on a throne as Cleopatra? Then the 'sexy' scene at the monuments - I assume to show how they love each other so much they are always at it?

Plot was rushed at the end people died in ways that were never in the book acting was diabolical. Seriously don't waste your time

Butchyrestingface · 18/04/2022 19:34

Gawd help me, the Simon character has just appeared on screen. Dashingly handsome, but all I can think is

HIM'S THE ONE WHO LIKES TO EAT PEOPLE. 🍽️

PortiaFimbriata · 18/04/2022 19:37

@Asperia

I meant the doctor. Smile
Oh of course, sorry
PeachCottonTree · 18/04/2022 19:40

I liked that it kept us guessing if they were going to change the plot but you can never improve on David Suchet!

RetrainRetrain · 18/04/2022 19:43

Damn, I really want to see how bad it is (the Suchet versions are perfect to me) but it's not showing for me on netflix

Gingernaut · 18/04/2022 19:44

Kenneth Branagh was brilliant as the English language Wallander.

As Poirot, he's just show boating. There seemed to be too much money and indulgence.

JudgeJ · 18/04/2022 19:44

@Allywill

Netflix? It’s not showing on mine? Are you UK?
Not on mine either.
Butchyrestingface · 18/04/2022 19:46

Allywill
Netflix? It’s not showing on mine? Are you UK?
Not on mine either.

I'm watching it on Youtube.

Pinklimey · 18/04/2022 19:46

I like poirit and don't know his back story. When I saw it was to be a branagh movie, I decided not to bother watching. That man is very good at destroying things with his ego.

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