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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Asking someone to move seats on a flight? Aibu ?

816 replies

wearejustfriends · 18/04/2022 14:31

Last week I was travelling to Gran Canaria with TUI.
I had booked mine and boyfriends seats when we booked and paid £22 for both.
I had the window and he had the middle.

A lady sat on the end and her daughter was in front.
She asked could they have our two seats and we have hers /daughters or my boyfriend switch with her daughter.
I politely said no.
Which she wasn't happy about.
We got "what difference does it make"
"Your adults,my daughter is sacred of flying and is a minor"

Anyway we wouldn't move.

Was I in the wrong ?
Surely if she was that bothered she could have paid like us.

OP posts:
StaceysmomandIhavegotitgoinon · 19/04/2022 13:33

I would have actually physically stayed in that seat till my death rather than give it up to a cheeky stingy fucker like her.

ilovesooty · 19/04/2022 13:34

I choose to be in a window seat so I can sleep more eastly if I want to. I prefer to be near the front too. That's why I pay to book and I won't move for someone's child if they didn't book a reservation. Their child - their responsibility.

ilovesooty · 19/04/2022 13:37

@StaceysmomandIhavegotitgoinon

I would have actually physically stayed in that seat till my death rather than give it up to a cheeky stingy fucker like her.
Her response lost her any moral high ground she thought she had. Funny that @umpire171 didn't mention that Hmm
cocktailclub · 19/04/2022 13:42

@HunterHearstHelmsley

I really think airlines/holiday companies should advertise the max cost, and then people can remove the bits they don't want - e.g. don't want a meal? -£15 happy to sit wherever? -£22

It would stop all this malarkey! You wouldn't have the I didn't know! excuse. People would have to make an informed choice to remove the bits they don't want.

This is a good idea. As long as they all had to comply so it was fair in terms of advertising

And Op was not bu. It was the mother's problem to sort and she should have paid on booking or asked to pay at checkin.

IncompleteSenten · 19/04/2022 15:01

Everyone on this thread who's saying they'd happily chuck fifty quid away to be kind to a stranger - pm me and I'll give you my PayPal info

Tia you kind, generous souls.

🤣

lunar1 · 19/04/2022 15:05

Whatever the seat cost is a factor when I book, if I can't afford to pick my seats I won't take that flight. I'm nervous on takeoff and I don't like to be able to see the wing ( I know🤦🏻‍♀️)

I wouldn't have moved and I wouldn't feel in the slightest bit guilty.

KosherDill · 19/04/2022 15:15

I love the unbundled pricing because I don't want the meals, extra checked bags, etc. but I DO want the best seat position I can get, and am willing to pay for it.

I just wish passenger fares could be priced by weight -- of the person and the amount of stuff they lug aboard.

LouB76 · 19/04/2022 15:18

I just wish passenger fares could be priced by weight -- of the person and the amount of stuff they lug aboard.

I've thought this before. I also think people with an extremely high BMI ie take up their own seat plus half of the person's next to them should have to buy 2 seats.

SoggyPaper · 19/04/2022 15:32

Do you think random lazy/stingy parent who can’t be arsed to pay for seats has some sort of priority over my disability?

Yes. All the people imagining families with ‘young children’ (which apparently includes 11 year olds) are the most needy of plane user groups and must be automatically given what they want (not ‘need’ as the CAA have clearly decided that sitting in the row in front meets the needs) by design clearly cannot see beyond their own noses.

There are all sorts of reasons why people might want to choose specific seats. Or to sit with their family or friends. Having a 7 year old doesn’t make you super special and somehow beyond paying the charge to reserve specific seats together.

Children are expensive. They increase the cost of things in all kinds of ways. It’s just how it is.

FairyCakeWings · 19/04/2022 15:35

Oh God, the idea of charging by weight. That’s a whole other crazy thread.

SoggyPaper · 19/04/2022 15:38

@FairyCakeWings

Oh God, the idea of charging by weight. That’s a whole other crazy thread.
Yes. And in no way related to someone choosing not to reserve specific seats together and then being a dick to people who have reserved the seats they wanted.
SoggyPaper · 19/04/2022 15:39

@IncompleteSenten

Everyone on this thread who's saying they'd happily chuck fifty quid away to be kind to a stranger - pm me and I'll give you my PayPal info

Tia you kind, generous souls.

🤣

I mean, it’s the charitable thing to do.
notimagain · 19/04/2022 15:47

@FairyCakeWings

Oh God, the idea of charging by weight. That’s a whole other crazy thread.
Grin

Ummmm.....like many around here when flying I'm HBO (definitely well within gauge limits) and used on line seat choice/check-in/boarding pass for years...

Frankly the idea that we should go back to the future and make everybody go to check-in on arrival at the terminal to be weighed, or be weighed at the gate ....Shock

ThreeB · 19/04/2022 15:57

@notimagain I flew on a military flight and got weighed on check in. My weight was then printed on my boarding pass 😮. We all had to check in (and be weighed) 8 hrs before the flight so that they could calculate how much weight the could allow for military cargo. It was an experience!

MallampatiCatty · 19/04/2022 15:58

I can't believe how cheeky she was. You were absolutely right to stay put. I would have made clear I paid forty odd quid especially though.

Can't believe the people on this post saying they would've moved! That's what she was banking on! Why bother paying if people will just hand over their seats

wink1970 · 19/04/2022 16:05

I have read the entire thread - every single response - and am really (happily) surprised how many think the lady was being a CF! I thought at least 50% would be "oh think of the children...."

To the OP who had wine split on her after refusing, that's happened to someone in my family.

It has confirmed my decision to pre-book my seats, as usual. Though I was once moved by Cabin Crew anyway, even though I had done so, to accommodate some nonsense. I was younger then, I would refuse now.

hamsterchump · 19/04/2022 16:13

I would tell her no and add that we'd paid extra for our seats if we had. I would only consider moving if she offered well over what I paid as I would much prefer to sit next to whoever I was with so she would have to offer at least £100 over.

O wouldn't ask her for money or hint I'm just saying what kind of unsolicited offer I might consider. Hate parents who expect special treatment when it's their own poor planning that's let them down.

Girlmumdogmumboymum · 19/04/2022 16:15

You weren't unreasonable. Tbf we have to wait for our seats to be allocated just before boarding on our next flight. Feeling quite worried that it'll mean someone having to be moved from their seat or something (will have a small baby and are hoping to score a bassinet seat)
That feels cheeky enough, and I can't book it, I've tried!

If she wanted to sit next to her DD she needed to pay. I can't understand people who won't pay but expect their own way, and then try to make it other people's problem! But my DD is scared.... then maybe you shouldve ensured you could be next to her!

Quincythequince · 19/04/2022 16:15

[quote ThreeB]@notimagain I flew on a military flight and got weighed on check in. My weight was then printed on my boarding pass 😮. We all had to check in (and be weighed) 8 hrs before the flight so that they could calculate how much weight the could allow for military cargo. It was an experience![/quote]
😱
I mean it’s important obviously, but it’s a bit in your face.

I was once visually assessed by a check in person when my luggage was significantly over (by circa 10kg), but as I was very slim (this was pointed out to me) and had only a tiny shoulder bag for carry on, they didn’t charge me.

I was actually told this. Had I been bigger, I bet they would have charged me excess luggage.

Stupid of me not to have weighed it, but I got lucky this once because I was slim. Not right really is it, unless it’s a blanket policy.

Blossomtoes · 19/04/2022 16:32

Feeling quite worried that it'll mean someone having to be moved from their seat or something (will have a small baby and are hoping to score a bassinet seat)

After reading this thread, I can see why you’re worried. Look on the bright side, you might (slim chance) get someone who, when asked to move, smiles and says “No trouble. What a beautiful baby. Have a good flight”.

SoggyPaper · 19/04/2022 16:34

@Blossomtoes

Feeling quite worried that it'll mean someone having to be moved from their seat or something (will have a small baby and are hoping to score a bassinet seat)

After reading this thread, I can see why you’re worried. Look on the bright side, you might (slim chance) get someone who, when asked to move, smiles and says “No trouble. What a beautiful baby. Have a good flight”.

It’s different if no one can book though.

I wouldn’t hold my breath for a bulkhead seat with bassinet though.

ithinkitsadhd · 19/04/2022 16:35

@KosherDill you really don't sound very nice at all. And they never would have been allocated the emergency row as they were flying with children who never get put there.

myrtleWilson · 19/04/2022 17:13

My favourite ever response to a thread similar to this (years ago) was a poster who went beyond "be kind" and insisted it was an adult's duty to swop seats with a younger person and that undertaking this duty would give oneself a sense of joy as one watched the young whippersnapper observing the magic of clouds in the sky. I wish I could recall the poster's name - I think it had "nanny" or "joy" in it t'was a dutiful delight to read their posts..

Hophop26 · 19/04/2022 17:19

I’m flying long haul with tui shortly and can see from the flight planner that nearly all of the seats have been pre booked and those that are left are odd few in front/behind each other and scattered across the plane and in the middle sections. I had a feeling would be more like that than with short haul so paid to select seats for my family this time when I normally chance it, too risky with kids on some flights and would never dream of asking someone to move if I was out of luck at check in!

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 19/04/2022 18:36

@ilovesooty

I choose to be in a window seat so I can sleep more eastly if I want to. I prefer to be near the front too. That's why I pay to book and I won't move for someone's child if they didn't book a reservation. Their child - their responsibility.
I choose a window seat as I’m claustrophobic and I have to be able to see out. I’m a nervous flyer unless I’m by a window (or even better, in a exit row seat next to the door and then I’m absolutely fine). That’s why I pay extra to choose my seat and they will have to prise me out of it to swap with someone who can’t be arsed to pay!

(I know you’re not supposed to be in a exit row seat if you’re a nervous flyer but I’m only nervous if I have people around me)