Or is this not how anyone does washing?!

[Sofiegiraffe]

Who is BU here, me or DP?

When I put a wash load in the machine, I pick up each item individually and sort of make a mental note of it so I have a rough idea of what is going into the machine (in case anyone asks where an item of their clothing is, or in case I'm wondering "where's that pair of black trousers of mine?", for example).

DP claims to just "pick up a load of stuff and shove it in". He doesn't put them in one by one. So if it's a darks wash that he's put on, and I ask "are my black trousers in that wash?" or "is DD's pink dress in that colours wash by any chance?", he won't know. All he knows is that he shoved a load of dark or coloured stuff in.

He thinks that's a perfectly reasonable way to do the washing. I think surely no one else does this? Surely most people look at what they're putting in so they at least have a rough idea of what's going in?!

Who is BU? Please settle this once and for all!

Split the colours and shove it all in. Who has time to inventory the washing!

No, you seem obsessive to every detail. I don't know how you have the time to be honest. I thought I was bad with all my complaints about my husband's domestic ineptitude.

But knowing what's in every wash? Wow, no way. He basically wears things once then wants them washed, so his clothes are basically always in the wash or around the washing area or on him. I remember what of mine is in the wash but that's just what comes naturally.

If I can't find something I just think 'must be in the wash' and that's that.

I think you should let it go.

Shove it in with colour Cather sheets and calgon tablet.

If something can't be found, it's either in their room as they haven't looked properly, in the wash box waiting to be washed, in the utility room or outside drying or in the basket waiting to be ironed.

Doesn't take long to look so no need to take any notice of what I'm putting in the machine.

If it's in the machine it's neither use nor ornament until it's out & dry!

All colours go in together

I use a colour washing powder

Simple

I, without fail, get flamed for this, but everyone does their own laundry in this house, and has done since about the age of 11.
Yea, they always have enough for a full load of darks. Occasionally we may share a white wash (No uniforms or work shirts here).
Your clothes, your responsibility. It's a no brainer.

Mental load pffttt.

YABU

I pick out stuff I know I'll need, so the kids' uniforms will go in before anything else for example, but anything else is pot luck and no, I don't mentally take note. If you've chucked it in the wash, you've surrendered it until a time of my choosing.

Yanbu to have your own method, laundry system is personal just like loading a dishwasher.

Personally though I don't do that, I shove everything in. I don't seperate colours and I wash on cold. Clothes don't last as long? Some of mine have lasted for 10+ years so I'm not sure I need them to last longer actually.

I sort into piles so have a vague idea, but it's mostly just 'shove it in'

Once a week, call for anything to go in the wash (if offspring at home), sort, and wash everything that day. Anything not in the basket goes in the following week. It doesn’t leave any scope for uncertainty - on a Saturday, if it was put in the washing basket, it’s in the wash. On other days, it’s either in the washing basket or not.

I check pockets before washing, and gave a good visual memory so having sorted everything I know what’s in the machine. But tbh I’m a ‘shove the whole pile in’ person otherwise.

@FleeceNavidadfromtheSheep

I, without fail, get flamed for this, but everyone does their own laundry in this house, and has done since about the age of 11. Yea, they always have enough for a full load of darks. Occasionally we may share a white wash (No uniforms or work shirts here). Your clothes, your responsibility. It's a no brainer. Mental load pffttt.

Agree 💯

It’s definitely you.
Even if I had noticed, I would as a matter of principle claim not to know.

Sorry, team DP

I think some of you need to get out a bit more.

Not RTFT but how long are your things in the wash?! Surely they're only inaccessible for about an hour?!

@ManyATime

It’s definitely you. Even if I had noticed, I would as a matter of principle claim not to know.

How odd.

@FleeceNavidadfromtheSheep

I, without fail, get flamed for this, but everyone does their own laundry in this house, and has done since about the age of 11. Yea, they always have enough for a full load of darks. Occasionally we may share a white wash (No uniforms or work shirts here). Your clothes, your responsibility. It's a no brainer. Mental load pffttt.

And the 1 year old? Who is responsible for her things, then? Me? DP? Both?

Separate into colours and whites. Prioritise uniform. Then shove in the rest.

Clothing location is simple. If it isn't in your drawers, isn't on the floor, isn't in the laundry basket, and isn't on the airer/line, it's in the washing machine.

@FleeceNavidadfromtheSheep my dds have done their own and been responsible for their own laundry since age 11.
At the time people thought I was very cruel (when it came up in conversation, I obviously don’t just bring it up out of the blue ) but I maintain that it taught them independence and a bit of ownership.
I do dh’s washing but he does all the cooking so I see it as a fair trade off. And I still do ds’s, he puts his stuff in our basket and knows if it’s not in the basket it’s not being washed. He also puts his own clean washing away.

I'm with you OP!! Although I am very anal about the laundry, DH isn't allowed to help 🤣 i definitely make subconscious notes on whats in there whilst I'm sorting the washing, putting things the right way round and doing up buttons ect 🙂 I can't deal with peoples lacklustre approach to laundry 😩 i also fold everything before I take it outside to hang on the line 😉😅 my family hate me 🤭

I am with you Sofiegiraffe, I do check what goes in mainly to check for tissues, screws, small items that my husband uses with his diabetes, needle tops, lancets for checking blood etc. Irritating but it saves a lot of time when the wash comes out. White tissues in a dark wash Aghhh

I'm with you OP. I make a mental note of what's gone in the wash and what hasn't. The reason being that I usually only do 1 coloured and 1 white wash a week. Any dirty clothes left over get left in the basket. I need to know what's where, if that makes sense.

And the 1 year old? Who is responsible for her things, then? Me? DP? Both?

Either you or DP, depending on how chores are split between the two of you.

I don't understand how you can be so attached to an item of clothing that you need to know it's whereabouts at all times.