AIBU to ask how I check the money politely?

[Scienceseeker]

Lady coming to collect something for over £200. She’s paying cash.

How do I say politely I want to check the money before handing the item over?

@MurmuratingStarling

Why do you need to be polite? Coz you're a woman?

Just say 'I will just count this out, won't be a minute...' Make sure it's all there.

This happened with me and DH once. A WORKMATE of his was buying some furniture off us, and was paying £450. He put it in a sealed envelope. I ripped the envelope open and started counting it. It was £100 short. The man said 'oh did I not put it all in? And pulled the other £100 out of his wallet.

Cheeky cunt.

The main moral of this story is TRUST NO FUCKER.

and that's a workmate!!

I have just moved house so am paying out a load of cash snd but f course the builder counts it-not at all offensive. I accidentally handed over too many notes to the plumber so when he counted it he handed me back what I had overpaid 😀

It's likely they will count it out to you. Then do the same when is in your hand. Then say "great, thanks" when it is all there. It is a transaction,you wouldn't expect someone in a shop not to check money is correct.

I always felt it would be rude to count out the notes my granny had just given me at Christmas. I then felt that strange as I wasn’t giving the amount my full appreciation as I didn’t know how much it was! That felt a bit ungrateful!

This woman was not your granny! Count it carefully!!

There's nothing wrong with counting it when she gives it to you. If you make a large cash purchase in a shop, the cashier doesn't just put it in the till, they count it out carefully.

@DenholmElliot

Just say "lets count it out together to check it", thats all you've got to say and then count it in front of her.

Why would you say that? You sound like a primary school teacher.

I know it's sorted now but if the buyer hasn't already counted it out the seller says thank you and counts it out. You don't need to say anything, no tinckly laughs or silly excuses or pretending you might not have counted it properly yourselves. Just count the money!

@VapeVamp12

Why do you need to be polite? Coz you're a woman?

No because it's POLITE. FFS not everything is a feminist issue.

I buy and sell quite a lot of second hand stuff and yes it's a generalisation but ime men don't apologise for counting the money..

What's politeness got to do with not wanting to get ripped off by someone trying to short change you?

Print up a piece of paper saying:

£200 cash received from (her name) and date, for xxxxxxxxx. List item.

Then when she arrives with the cash say 'Let me just check the money and give you your receipt' and count it out clearly in front of her. If I handed you £200 and you went into a back room to count it I'd be wondering whethering you'd return saying I was £20 (or more) short.

Count it out, sign the receipt, hand it over, thank her and say goodbye. If she takes offence, that's her problem.

I find there are an above average number of CFs who buy stuff on FB marketplace etc.
Other ruses include turning up with the wrong notes and expecting me to have change e.g.

"It was £25 wasn't it? Oh, I've only got two £20s. Have you got change?"
"No."
"Oh, shall we call it £20 then?"

If someone is taking money out of their wallet/purse then they will usually count it out anyway so I just watch them do it and then quickly flick through when they hand it over (I work in a shop so I'm used to counting money anyway) but if its in an envelope/separate money bag then I usually just say something like "I'll just check this and make sure it's the right amount, wouldn't want you to have overpaid because these new notes are notorius for sticking together but I also don't want to have to chase you down the road for an extra tenner!" It's always said with a smile and a light tone and nobody has ever taken offence and it usually leads to some light, jokey chitchat about how awful the new notes are compared to paper or how the chase wouldn't last very far as they didn't think think wear trainers etc which allows time for me to count the money, confirm its all there and conclude the transaction.

If I was buying something and I was the one handing the money over I would expect it to be counted in front of me, nay, I would WANT it to be, lest the seller come back to me with 'I counted the money when you left & it was £20 short' or summat

We sold our caravan in cash. I counted it out and they had short changed us by £100 having already negotiated down anyway. I also used to count the cash infront of customers when I worked for a car dealership. She shouldn’t be offended that you want to check.

Just say you want to count it before giving the item. Most people wouldn't be offended and if the person is, you've done the right thing.

Literally no-one is going to be surprised or offended if you count the money and you don't have to explain what you're doing.

It would be more odd if you didn't count it, or launched into a spiel about counting money. Have you never bought or sold anything like this?

@NormaSnorks

I find there are an above average number of CFs who buy stuff on FB marketplace etc. Other ruses include turning up with the wrong notes and expecting me to have change e.g.

"It was £25 wasn't it? Oh, I've only got two £20s. Have you got change?"
"No."
"Oh, shall we call it £20 then?"

Yeh people drive me mad when they do this, I listed something for £90 and when the woman came to pay for it she said “oh it was £80 wasn’t it?” I said no it was £90 and she said she thought it was £80 so only bought 80 🙄

Brought*

Why get flustered about this, it’s business.

It’s a perfectly reasonable and expected thing to do. If you offend someone by counting in front of them, why would you care? First they shouldn’t be offended, and second after the transaction you’ll likely never see them again.

I mean don’t sneer at them and tell them they look shifty so you have to be extra careful that they didn’t swindle you 😒

She may count it out as she hands it to you anyway (I would)

If I'm paying in cash, I always ask them to count it out when I hand it to them, just for my own peace of mind.
I'd be mortified if I'd miscounted or mislaid a note without realising.
I just say, "Do you want to just count it while I'm here to make sure it's all there?"
I would think most people would expect you to count it.
Mistakes happen.

@Ifailed

just count it out in front of her, don't have to say anything.

This.

You don't know her.

You check it right in front of her.

Nothing to be embarrassed about.

Count it out.

I do this if I am paying someone for a job, so there isn't any confusion afterwards.

As pp have said, just count it. Same as if buying something in a shop.

This must be quintessential british politeness!

It's a business transaction - imagine yourself as the check out person in a shop - person brings goods to the till and hands you cash - you'd count it wouldn't you?

It's no different here just because it's in the comfort of your home

You'd be silly not to count it! Just do it- doesn't matter if she minds as its simply you making sure you get what you're owed.

@VapeVamp12

Why do you need to be polite? Coz you're a woman?

No because it's POLITE. FFS not everything is a feminist issue.

Exactly! Jesus Christ some people on here.

@NormaSnorks

I find there are an above average number of CFs who buy stuff on FB marketplace etc. Other ruses include turning up with the wrong notes and expecting me to have change e.g.

"It was £25 wasn't it? Oh, I've only got two £20s. Have you got change?"
"No."
"Oh, shall we call it £20 then?"

That's my experience too!