Urgent - how do I quit this job tonight?

[Insuchafuckingbind]

I need to write an email explaining I'm withdrawing from a freelance gig I was doing. But we haven't had a contract which makes it easier.

I cannot cope with it, I love the organisation which makes it hard but I'm overwhelmed by panic and never want to speak to any of them again.

What should I say?

I think they know of individual medications and individual illnesses, issues etc but I don’t trust them to marry up specific outside the norm medications as a treatment for a particular issue.

That really shouldn’t be true of any specialty, GPs certainly but that’s to be expected and is in no way a slight, they just can’t be across the nuances of every med and would not be across all the current literature in every specialty.

There are also informal sub-specialties within specialties. For example you will get psychs that don’t see patients with schizophrenia, they focus on depression, anxiety and a few other things and send patients with schizophrenia to colleagues that they know specialise in that area. Those colleagues should know treatment options for schizophrenia inside out, but if they got a patient with ADHD then they likely wouldn’t be across all detail and would shunt to a colleague who focuses on developmental disorders/ASD who is across it. It’s similar for many specialties that umbrella a lot of stuff. A good hint is to look at who is currently active in that area in relevant literature, what institution(s) they are affiliated with, who their working colleagues are and it gives good direction on who is likely to be across the detail and all options including off label.

Are you on beta blockers? That could help with anxiety without increasing your blood pressure. Do you have a doctor you trust? It sounds like some of your concerns about drugs to help with your mental health may be driven by your anxiety.

Should have added my child’s psych only diagnoses and treats patients referred for ASD/ADHD/ODD. They’ll only do GAD, anxiety, depression if a component of those but don’t do Depression as its own entity for example, they leave that to others who specialise in that area.

This anxiety level will be raising your BP higher and in a much less controlled way than a low trial dose of meds would, OP.
Please talk to a doctor. You don’t have to live like this.

Well, I sent the email and then just ignored my inbox. The world didn't end. Thank you to you all for helping.

Please talk to a doctor. You don’t have to live like this.

I wish people could maybe understand it's not always this simple.

Last year we spent the equivalent of over £1000 on several appointments with a psychiatrist because I wanted to see what options might be available. In the end he prescribed SSRIs, which I already was not really keen on because of the problems with my eyes. I filled the prescription, but too scared to take them.

I have really quite a difficult medical history with a lot of crap going on relating to several areas (ophthalmology, neurology, cardiology) and it is hard to describe how scary and overwhelming it all is, especially the idea of introducing a new drug that can exacerbate an issue and create a new problem. Especially when you feel you don't have capacity for any more new problems.

Yoga was mentioned and I am going to try to find a gentle yoga class that is accessible and not fast paced. I used to love it but now cannot let my head go lower than my heart and need two small operations - so frustrating as even child's pose is out. But I did really love it so should go back and do what I can, and also meditation with a yoga teacher.

It doesn't sound like a very good consultation if you ended up being prescribed meds you are scared to take. Is there evidence about side effects and eye problems with SSRIs?

It is often the case that different anti-depressants work differently with different physiologies. Sometimes people have to try several before finding the right one for them.

Sending and sympathy as I know what it's like to be in a constant state of work dread

Op I’m so glad the yoga suggestion resonated. There might be online classes now you might be able to join, even from abroad. Also check out the free yoga relaxations on the Yoga Nidra Network site. I find they really help.

No-one is saying it’s simple. That’s precisely why I recommended talking to a doctor about a low dose, low risk trial.

You don’t want to, that’s your right. But there ARE options out there that could make things better for you. I hope you find one

Insuchafuckingbind I do think you need to be careful with the issues you describe but Chlonedine which was specifically made to treat blood pressure and in so doing also had the knock on effect of helping with eye problems. But then it was discovered it also treated ADHD.

It isn’t a specific ADHD med that is supposed to treat ADHD but it seems to treat the problems you have but also treats ADHD as well.