To not want PIL to visit today? Very sore

[newbornbubble]

Had DS on Friday by c-section and was home by Saturday. MIL and FIL haven't seen him yet as we wasn't discharged until late Saturday then they wasn't able to visit yesterday. My mum was here helping us and BIL visited yesterday.

I sat downstairs all day yesterday as BIL visited and didn't want to feel rude and by the end of the night I was in so much pain.

I just want a day in bed today with OH and the kids then happy for them to visit tomorrow. Or do I just suck it up and get on with it? I know OH is dying for them to meet him and I don't want them to feel like I'm leaving them out as my mum has been here.

Be totally honest with them. The baby can obviously say hi and have a cuddle but you are sleeping it off upstairs as c-sections are serious operations and you need to recover. They won't mind - let's be honest, it's not really you they are in a rush to see!

@newbornbubble

Thanks everyone, It's fine anyway I will sit downstairs for a little bit then just go up to bed then he can bring him up when he needs a feed.

I think it's more me i feel bad because I haven't seen them in weeks and have just been staying at home. Then now when I finally get to see them I'm upstairs in bed. But I guess it doesn't really matter.

With all the love in the world to you love, but for heaven’s sake TELL them this! They will understand!

“I’m so happy you’re here, lovely to see you, I’m afraid I’m feeling absolutely exhausted and in a lot of pain, I think I stupidly over did it yesterday and am paying the price! So H will do all the looking after you this time, and I’ll stay with you for a bit, but might have to take myself off for a lie down at some point so you can have time to catch up, snuggle the baby and see how good a cuppa your son makes - marks out of 10!

Did they show up for a visit?

What did you do?

What did your OH do??

Any other major operation and no one would expect you to be entertaining them all day. Stay in bed. Let DH show his amazing parenting skills to his parents. Unless your hormones are making you very protective and haven't settled down yet in which case maybe just say they can pop by for an hour.

Can they come around and see baby and you stay upstairs resting, they can then pop up and give you a cuddle, card, gift etc? I did this with my recent baby but I have a fairly big room with a sofa in it and appreciate you might not or might not want people in your bedroom.

If the first option doesn't work for you then I'd be firm and rearrange.

@CoralPaperweight

Not this sort of thread again! Why do women think that family wishes / wants trump their own medical needs. OP you need to recover and frankly it won't be the end of the world if PIL have to wait another day or two. BIL shouldn't have been there all day either ...

My thoughts too.

Poor woman has only just had major abdominal surgery, is trying to establish BF (not easy and very time consuming), and people are piling on about rights of family members to access the baby.