When men say "I prefer women without make-up"...

[ThingThatIBring]

AIBU to think that when men say "I prefer women without make-up" that they don't usually know what they're talking about (and don't usually have a clue that women ARE wearing it)?

The reality of this statement is usually:

• I don't like it when women wear really obvious MAKE-UP make-up (loads of lippy and false eyelashes etc) or when it's badly applied (making it obvious);
• I like really good-looking fresh-faced young women whose complexions, etc., look smooth without it;
• I like to think of myself as very wholesome (and maybe a bit of a feminist).

What they DON'T mean (but don't realise they don't mean) is:

• I prefer the look of the average woman of my own age without any make-up on.

I know so many men who say this, and it always mildly irritates me as it's said like it's a kind of virtue.

As a post-mating-phase human, it's not like it really affects my life. But it always makes me feel for all the women who are still in a position where they're affected by this nonsense...

I notice less of a full smile in the no makeup pic - subtle but signnificant, and nowt to do with makeup.

EVERYONE looks better with carefully applied natural looking makeup eg smooth complexion, longer lashes and filled in brows
No they don't.

It's interesting to see the photos some posters have put up of women with natural looking but full make up. I bet most men would think that they're make up free. I probably look like I have no make up on today (to the male eye!). I actually have a full face...foundation but it's a very close match to my skin tone so just makes me look evened out. Under eye concealer. Eyebrow gel but just so my brows are filled in and less sparse. Mascara and a small amount of eyeliner. Nude lipstick and a very light blusher.

Yes @DrSbaitso it will have taken a lot of products to look so effortlessly polished! and I agree nicely applied make up just enhances what Mother Nature gave us, the woman pictured does not look fake, shallow, not very bright or troweled in gloop as has been said about women who wear make up on here.

@Nomoreusernames1244

EVERYONE looks better with carefully applied natural looking makeup eg smooth complexion, longer lashes and filled in brows

So what you really mean is:

I don’t think your lashes meet my standards for length.

I don’t think your complexion meets my standard of perfection.

I don’t think your brows meet my standards of beauty.

Personally I think everyone’s lashes, brows and skin are more than perfect on their own.

Choose to wear make up if you want. But don’t tell other women they would look better if they changed their face.

Fuck sake we’re supposed to be building other women up, not saying well you’re ok, but would be more acceptable if you changed x y and z.

Everyone is beautiful, they don’t need society’s version of “enhancement”.

@Nomoreusernames1244 Urgh you sound really virtuous!

@daimbarsatemydogsbone

EVERYONE looks better with carefully applied natural looking makeup eg smooth complexion, longer lashes and filled in brows No they don't.

@daimbarsatemydogsbone They do though

Or these:

1. Not sure which I prefer as the eye make-up is quite heavy, I quite like the look but not for every day. Maybe something inbetween is best?

1. Again quite heavy make-up but I think her skin looks great in the make-up pic.

Everyone is beautiful, they don’t need society’s version of “enhancement”.

No, not everyone is beautiful. I'm not beautiful. And that's ok.

Oops

1. I really like her look although her eye make-up is maybe a bit much.

I've picked these images because I have imperfect skin and for me, I don't care about eye make-up, lipstick or anything else, it's simply skin make-up that I feel makes the biggest difference. I have a very, very uneven skin tone and don't like how I look without make-up being honest.

I love Jennifer and Meghan’s make up, both have full faces of make up beautifully applied.

@MurmuratingStarling

One of the things that throws me is the woman (bottom right pic) has a different hairstyle to the other 3. That's what it is I think.

If you cover her forehead with your finger, then you can see more that she's the same person. Clearly too much time on my hands today...!

@5128gap

🤣

I will give it a go!!!

@AmberLynn1536 Jen and Meg look beautiful up there. ^ Well they are beautiful anyway, but the make up enhances them, and brings out their best features.

I rarely wear make up. 2 of my past boyfriends said they preferred no make up. One was always on at me to wear it. All 3 of them liked short skirts though.
Personally I think it looks nice in the evening but a bit try hard in the day. I don't think anyone looks more beautiful with make up though - they look like they have made an effort, which obviously can be a good thing. Beauty is to do with health and youth and bone structure and a good night's sleep and confidence - not darker eyelashes or a bit of powder on your skin.

Not making any difference @5128gap (sorry!) BUT I agree the teeth are very similar, and the eyes too. So maybe it IS the same woman.

As you (and someone else said,) make up can change someone dramatically!

Considering the amount of make up many women wear (orange foundation like a mask, vivid bronzer, huge false eyelashes, giant brows, sticky looking lipgloss) I can see why some men prefer the no makeup look.

They probably mean they prefer women who look natural (maybe they’re wearing light make up but it’s not noticeable as it blends into their skin and enhances rather than looks like paint?) Eg who can tell if a woman is wearing tinted moisturiser/concealer, discreet lipstick in a natural shade etc?

So many women seem to go for the false lashes, heavy liner, or clumpy mascara and clumsy contouring look it’s hard to see what they actually look like!

What's most noticeable to me in the before/after pics at 15:27 is her freckles have been obliterated! To create a bland, uniform complexion. In a supposedly ever more diverse society, are we really still saying that natural pigmentation is bad?

Looking tired is best addressed by sleep. Terrible skin by fresh air, exercise, healthy eating. Not by applying makeup to create the illusion of being well-rested or in good health.

[quote MurmuratingStarling]@AmberLynn1536 Jen and Meg look beautiful up there. ^ Well they are beautiful anyway, but the make up enhances them, and brings out their best features. [/quote]
Don’t they just! Both very beautiful women.

Looking tired is best addressed by sleep. Terrible skin by fresh air, exercise, healthy eating. Not by applying makeup to create the illusion of being well-rested or in good health

Fresh air won’t magically erase broken veins, uneven skin tone, they won’t suddenly become invisible to the naked eye because I’ve gone for a brisk walk or pumped some iron, I eat healthily, exercise daily but still have uneven skin tone and only make up will even that out. As for looking tired some women have dark circles no matter how many hours of sleep they get.

Well I don't think women look great with too much make up on either. Surely everyone has a "looks" preference?

@PickAChew

I've never had a man say this to me.

Also this

Never ever ever have I heard a man say this

I have heard men and woman say they prefer a natural look which may mean the same, or it could refer to casual clothes or any number of preferences

Thank you so much for saying that AmberLynn. I really struggle without make-up and find it quite hard reading things that say people who like wearing it are being vain, vapid, all of the other insults, some of which are on this thread. That it's sad that women wear it and don't embrace themselves. I don't feel comfortable posting a picture of my own face (maybe later!) but I've found a picture on google that's the closest I can find to how my own is. I can cover this up in about two minutes and I feel so much better for it. I do not feel comfortable going into e.g. a shop without it and in the past have had quite bad comments. There is no amount of exercise or sleep that will get rid of it. I've had it since I was about 13.

People make statements about how you should embrace not wearing make-up, that you're anti-feminist if you wear make-up, so many different things. But for me the reality is that I feel bad if I don't wear it and I really wish people would understand, more than anything else, that their own experience of not wearing make-up is not transferable to everyone.

'Uneven skin tone' is a hop, skip & jump away from 'pigmentation is bad'. I have freckles and splotches and patches of pigment, I flush easily, I'm weathered by time and the elements. I have no idea what an 'even skin tone' is, or why I should find it interesting or desirable.

My 'no make up, don't do anything to my face' friend has beautiful skin, nicely shaped eyebrows, dark eye lashes.
She also has very easy hair and is amazed at the fuss most women seem to go to.
I think actually its easier for some than others.

No it isn't Stravaig and I don't like that implication at all. You try living with the nose in the above pic and stupid comments from people and see if you wouldn't want to apply something so your nose is the same colour as the rest of your face and you can forget about it. There are different degrees of everything. I'm not talking about freckles or a bit of a flush, I'm talking about a neon nose. I personally think you're being ridiculous if you can't understand at least why I would want to feel good in myself and confident rather than self conscious and actually unhappy, when it can be fixed in a matter of minutes, but I shouldn't cover it for the sake of not wearing make-up?