Is this amount of compensation for distress reasonable?

[Wotagain]

My Darling husband died suddenly just over 5 weeks ago.
As the executor I had to contact our bank, First Direct about our joint accounts, and then of course send them the interim death certificate proving he had died. ( it’s an interim one as there will be an inquest).
This was all done within a few days and immediately after myself receiving the interim death certificate from the coroners office.
Two weeks later I received a letter from First Direct, addressed to the executor of Wotagain’s estate, sending their condolences on my death and asking for my death certificate.
To say I was upset is a complete understatement, I was devastated, tearful, shaking, and then really, really angry.
My view is the bereavement team at First Direct had one job, to get the name and details of the deceased person right first time, and not send such a letter to a widow numb with grief.

AIBU to ask for £500 as compensation for this distress?

First Direct have offered me £150 which amounts to just over 1p per day for the years that my husband and I banked with them.

All seems a bit grabby. Mistakes happen.

[quote Wotagain]This is the ombudsman guidance for anyone interested

www.financial-ombudsman.org.uk/consumers/expect/compensation-for-distress-or-inconvenience[/quote]
Based on that, and what you've said, I would say they would offer you between £100 and £300 - which is what you've been offered. You might be able to push for nearer £300 (in fact I think it's likely), but if you don't need the money, is it really a good use of your time right now?

I'm sorry for your loss.

The bereavement team have one job - just one job and they fucked up really badly
Do you honestly believe that the bereavement team does nothing other than update a database with the name of the deceased?

Tell your bank how you feel and see what they say. You can always refer the complaint to the Ombudsman if you don't feel you have been fairly compensated. I'm sorry for your loss .

My condolences.

Do you want recognition of the error, compensation or to punish them? An apology and a bunch of flowers is recognition. An apology and £150 is compensation. Pursuing £500 is seeking to punish them.

It's a difficult time to make balanced decisions, but there is no compensation for the type of error that was made. Any monetary value attached to compensation is nominal when there's no associated financial loss.

I think you should accept the £150 compensation for a routine admin error.

Some years ago I was the executor of a complicated estate, and employed an accounting firm to calculate the taxes. Their letters were ALWAYS addressed to the deceased, including the one asking for a certified copy of the death certificate. Sigh.

I understand why you are distressed. I don't understand how a specific amount of money would make you less so

I am sorry for your loss OP.

When my mother died and I was the executor I told her internet/phone provider who cancelled her account. A couple of weeks later I got a marketing letter addressed to her and on the outside of the envelope (so I didn’t even need to open it to see it) it said “How Can We Help You To Come Back To Us?”

They did get an earful from me but nobody mentioned financial compensation.

Will £500 actually make you feel better? Or do you just want £500?

She’s not grabby, she’s angry. It’s not uncommon at all for the anger stage of grief to be pointed elsewhere and I’ve been through it myself recently when trying to sort deceased bank account I got a parking ticket and ended up screaming down the phone.

@Wotagain

I suppose what is so terribly difficult to convey is how emotionally vulnerable and exhausted I feel, coping with immense grief at a sudden, awful death, and dealing with what to a normal person, ‘not in state of shock’ is a routine admin error.

I completely understand that (and we had a similar error when my brother died very young, so I sympathise very much). But £500 won’t change that any more than the £150 will. I’d want an apology and a donation to the charity or my choice.

Sorry for your loss, but I think you’re being ridiculous. They made a mistake. Is £500 going to make you feel better?

My dad died recently and I’m the executor. I’ve had a few mistakes made by people making contact, not least the undertaker and the hospital! I accepted apologies and just put it behind me.

Sorry for your loss but it’s just an admin error

I can understand how upset and angry you are but I think they have made a reasonable offer to make amends. No figure compensates for losing your husband, which must be truly awful for you and I’m so sorry for your loss. You have so much to deal with at the moment that I would let this go and try to process all the emotional and practical things you need to go through at this awful time

How would £500 help you feel better about that?

Tbh the fact you are on here asking if £150 is sufficient makes you seem very grabby. It's a case of incorrect drop down menu not some callous act, you trying to justify how emotionally vulnerable you are to an anonymous forum makes you seem exactly the opposite. Accept their sincere apologies and the modest compensation. If they don't correct it now then you have a case for a proper claim.

I have a system with drop down menu's, I've personally not made a mistake but I understand how it happens

@AlmostAJillSandwich

I'm so sorry you're hurting, but someone has made a mistake, i don't think it warrants giving you any money at all. Their offer of £150 sounds very generous to me, why do people expect money for nothing these days?

This.

This is a huge, huge company, that deals in money. My feeling is that only money will talk

For such a huge financial company (I work for one), £500 won’t ‘talk’ any more than £150 will, sadly.

Why do you need £500? Why isn't an apology enough? If they want to offer it's that's fine but to ask for it just comes across as a bit......grubby sorry

So sorry for your loss, OP.

I lost my partner very suddenly in late 2020, and I know how very vulnerable it made me feel. The slightest thing would cause me to have a meltdown.

I think for the bereavement team, who should be extra careful, to make an error like this is a damn poor show, and £500 wouldn't be unreasonable, imo.

Agree with everyone here. Sorry op.

YANBU to ask, but they might say no. Will fighting this help how you feel? It will drag out your dealings with the bank, at a time when you're probably already dealing with lots of different organisations. Every time they write with a refusal or a counteroffer, you're going to be reminded of their mistake. Would it be easier for you just to accept the £150 and draw a line under what the bank has done?

I'm sorry for your loss.

It's unbelievable that companies make these sort of mistakes, it really is. This is one area they should make damned sure they don't make admin errors. Damned sure.

When my dad died my mum notified people as you do. One company wrote back, saying thank you for sending the death certificate, here's the bill, please pay within 7 days.

Addressed to my dad. His full name. Thanking him for sending them his death certificate.

Mum phoned them again. Very upset. They sent a final reminder. Again addressed to my dad!

I ended up sending them a very sarcastic 3 page letter. One page of which was "he is dead" in a variety of languages. One page of euphemisms for death. I also told them when and where we'd be scattering his ashes if they wanted to serve him or anything and advised them to bring a vacuum cleaner.

They wrote back wiping the debt.

Such incompetence at the most distressing time makes you so angry and I think part of that is that anger is less painful than grief.

No money will make you feel better. A heartfelt apology from them might.

500 quid, you are demanding 500 quid. That's not anger. That's greed. I can't quite get my head around it to be honest. They made a mistake, they offered you £150 but you think that is not enough.

I suppose what is so terribly difficult to convey is how emotionally vulnerable and exhausted I feel, coping with immense grief at a sudden, awful death, and dealing with what to a normal person, ‘not in state of shock’ is a routine admin error

So there is a monetary value on your grief? 500 quid will make you less emotionally vulnerable?

Someone made a mistake, they are trying to apologise by giving you £150 and you are saying that is not enough???

That's not grief, that's grabby. Grief does not look for compensation for mistakes made. Grabby looks for mistakes made to made for compensation.

Ughhh no.

” My feeling is that only money will talk.”

£150 or £500 won’t impact upon the bank. Unfortunately, money can’t and won’t stop future human errors. I appreciate you must be feeling so sad and grief stricken and this was the final straw. I am sorry for your loss and wish you peace and comfort in your memories of your husband. I am sorry for your added distress at such a tough time for you.