Cards for dad's on mother's day?!

[TeddyisMydog]

What is this fuckery
What is the point?
If a child only has a father then surely they can wait until Mothers day and vice versa?

My widowed husband got a card from his adult daughters this week. It says, “it takes a great dad to be a mum too”. I thought that was lovely.

If it makes a child who doesn't have a mum or a dad feel better why is it a problem?

@RoomOfRequirement

My mum did the work of mum and dad, I imagine some dads have to do the same for dad. I see nothing wrong with this, and yes they do have it for 'the other way around' too.

Can we go back to discussing things that are ACTUALLY damaging to women's lives and rights? This is the kind of thing people make fun of us for.

The whole of Mumsnet doesn’t have to be about damage to women’s lives & rights, though? Can’t there sometimes be room for a WTF moment?

Just because the cards exist both ways for both occasions doesn’t make it better, IMO. If you don’t have a father to celebrate, make a MASSIVE big deal about Mother’s Day, go all out. If you don’t have a mother to celebrate, go large on Father’s Day.

Commercialisation is crap.

@Tiredmamaaa

Why if it’s ok for a child to make something for someone else other than their Mum to thank them for looking after, is it not ok for them to buy a card to do the same thing?

Some children, as other people have said, don’t want to feel left out and part of that experience and feeling like you are doing something special for someone is buying them a nice card like all the others kids get to do.

It’s a small token of appreciation and should be taken for the positive thing that it is and not turned in to a negative. There is enough of that in the world already!

Exactly.

I have a relative whose mum died very young. Her nursery and school always had her make a happy Mother’s Day card for her dad. No one was offended, and what was the child to do while everyone else was making cards for mum.

If you don’t have a mother to celebrate, go large on Father's Day.

@NoSquirrels wouldn't it be better if a person with no mother, especially a child does what they get the most comfort from on a day that might already be really tough for them? Why the need to dictate how a bereaved person reacts to something so insignificant to anyone else but then?

@Supersee

Will there be any 'wishing a brilliant mum on Father's Day!' cards. Highly doubt it the way the world is going.

www.thortful.com/cards/fathers-day/for-mum

*them

Commercialisation is crap, I agree, but I'm not sure focusing on a niche product for children who've lost or don't have a relationship with a parent is the way to go

One more thing that men are trying to take from women.

@Supersee yes there is

@ExMachinaDeus

One more thing that men are trying to take from women.

Read the thread. There are cards for mums on Father's Day too.

Maybe people on here need to realise not all families or kids have a mum and dad
the card is not offensive in anyway or taking anything away from motherhood

@ExMachinaDeus

One more thing that men are trying to take from women.

And are the women who get cards on Father’s Day taking away from men?

Or is it just another way of letting people celebrate the key people in their lives if they so wish.

@ExMachinaDeus

One more thing that men are trying to take from women.

Yeah, my widowed husband who didn’t even buy it - his daughters did - is a proper arsehole, hey? 🙄

Maybe it's for trans dads

• runs away •

[quote worriedatthistime]@Supersee yes there is [/quote]

I know, I've got that point now.

I personally don't really care, I can see why but everyone falls over themselves in the name of inclusion at the moment. Some lose - or don't have - a mum, some lose a dad, some lose both parents early. It's the way of the world.

I guess if it makes a child feel better then who am I to argue, but it's commercialised crap IMO.

Thats ridiculous

@NerrSnerr

If you don’t have a mother to celebrate, go large on Father's Day.

@NoSquirrels wouldn't it be better if a person with no mother, especially a child does what they get the most comfort from on a day that might already be really tough for them? Why the need to dictate how a bereaved person reacts to something so insignificant to anyone else but then?

I’m not dictating anything.

I take all the points about different family relationships and I think it’s important children get the chance to be as involved in themed activities around certain days like this in an inclusive way as every other child.

Then, I guess if you’re old enough to go seek out and buy your own card and you want one then fair enough.

But in between, it strikes me as a weird area. If a child said to me, please can you help me buy a card for my dad for Mother’s Day, I’d suggest making one, I guess. I wouldn’t proactively suggest to a child without a mum they should buy Dad a card on that occasion. If they’re too young to ask or notice I wouldn’t mention it at all.

I can see the need for cards for other female relations/friends who fulfill a mothering role.

But Dads already get their own day, that’s all I mean. There’s already a chance to celebrate their parenting. It’s in June.

All cards are capitalist and a waste of money but it’s not about menz

I grew up with one parent and they got cards on mothers and Father’s Day because they did the job of both.

Pretty obvious it’s targeted at people without mums. I don’t see how it’s hurting anyone tbh

Ridiculous. For me this is right up there with that whole 'push present for my husband' thing on the other thread.

It's not Mothers Day, it's Mothering Sunday (misses point of thread....)

I think this belongs on the feminism board😄.

Personally, I don't understand why someone would write a card to a dad on Mother's Day. If a child doesn't have a mother is his/her life then surely it would make more sense to write a card to a granny, aunty, older sister or another important female figure in their lives. Father's Day is totally separate, and again a card could be written to a grandad, uncle etc.