If you have mental health problems that stop you from doing things do you get sick of people saying they can’t do things because of their mental health.

[Toothiehurtie]

No trolling genuinely wondering. There are kids in my kids classes at school who are starting to get attention for mental health issues and there are more kids than not now with a reason why they need to be treated differently tk the majority to the point where the kids doing what they are supposed to be doing are in the minority. If you’re the one who normally gets an allowance for your mental health does it piss you off when it’s allowed for everyone or do you feel like it’s great that mental health is being acknowledged. The example I’m thinking of is a kid at school who was allowed not to wear school shoes and now most of the class wear trainers and the whatsapp grouo mums are saying their kids are much happier if they get to wear what they want, and now school are clamping back. Not trolling not fishing just interested if you or your kid gets treated differently to everyone else and allowances are made fo you then does it ruin it for you if lots of people get it too

I would question that if over half the children in the class need interventions then it might be more effective to change how the class is run rather than to remove half of them.

@Toothiehurtie

About the ruining I guess I mean if child a struggles in a large size class and is taken out to a much smaller class for an hour a week to work on self esteem and then eventually 18 of the thirt kids in a class are being taken out of the standard lesson to go to the smaller glass it isn’t smaller any more and it’s meant that the people who really needed it in the first place haven’t got it anymore

Do you actually have experience of that happening though? It sounds like you’re making it up. Not in a trolling way, but a “for instance” way.

I think the biggest problem is that some teachers have listened to mental health snake oil people and therefore children have confused ‘anxiety’ with ‘anything that might make someone anxious.’

They aren’t the same thing.

I work in a university and the amount of students with ‘additional needs’ is astounding. So many need their own room for an exam that we cannot cope - just not enough rooms to give them all their own room and invigilator. Lots of these exams are for professional programs and the regulatory bodies insist on some exams as nowadays, cheating in essays is so prevalent that an exam is the only way you can guarantee it is the student’s own work. They will be entering high stakes professions so god knows how they will cope on a daily basis if they can’t handle sharing a room for an exam. There doesn’t seem to be any recognition that exams cause a level of anxiety- which is not the same as having an anxiety disorder.

I do get really fed up of my daughters being used as support humans for others, just because they're resilient. When mine have actual trauma they're supposed to cope but their friends (whose parents have diagnosed them with anxiety/asperger's/adhd) get my children to support them for the slightest imagined problem- the teachers set this up.

It's difficult, when DD was little there was one DC in her class who had a lot of extra attention.

They're 13 now, the little girl above still has serious issues with a debilitating learning disorder and awful social skills, she would have been institutionalised in the olden days DC have to learn to except others.

My DS has autism with pda he wears different uniform due to sensory issues and his teachers let him take the lead, now 4 years later he is brilliant child who loves school, he was out of control.

I'm forever indebted for the patience kindness and support making him a better person.

@DoobryWhatsit

Once you're at a stage where more than half a population have "additional needs", you can't really say those needs are "additional" any more, they're just the norm. And then the people with the more significant additional needs can get lost.

You’ve hit the nail on the head. Do you work in a job where you explain things to people? That’s exactly it

Direct experience

"whose parents have diagnosed them with anxiety/asperger's/adhd"

Parents cannot diagnose these and so if your child's school is treating them as actual diagnoses then your problem lies with the school.

What are your medical qualifications Op?

whose parents have diagnosed them with anxiety/asperger's/adhd) get my children to support them for the slightest imagined problem- the teachers set this up.
Parents cannot diagnose DC.
The Teacher should not be using your DC to look after another DC.

One friend he husband gambled behind her back thousands of pounds of their money - he was diagnosed with ADHD and their counsellor and friends said it was the ADHD and not ‘him’. Another has been diagnosed with mental health issues that she has to ‘accept’as his anxiety
It may well be the case, people with ADHD make decisions without consequences.
IMO not a professional - I think most adults who are homeless, addicted, alcoholics, gambling addicts are not NT.
Maybe awareness of the issues in DC will prepare better adults.
There was a boy in my class in 80's he would throw tables, have massive meltdowns, he died an addict homeless in a doorway.

You're right, but it's so pervasive in state primary schools, well behaved girls are sat next to naughty boys all the time. It makes girls think they are responsible for moderating others' behaviour.

Everyone nowadays has a mental health condition, right? No one can just be lazy or abusive or a bully. They are mentally ill.

@Penyu

I was prepared to not agree with what you wrote OP but I'm a primary teacher you are basically describing my class. So many (17) out of 29 have some kind of official diagnosis/accommodation etc and it's very hard to keep track. Some appalling behaviour is swept away under the "additional needs" umbrella - calling peers fat cunts, punching in the face, telling teachers to fuck off, telling a girl she's a fucking fat (country name here) and this is year 6. No consequences, just "restorative conversions".

Other children are scared and parents complain but very little done.

The world's collide when both children have additional needs and generally it's the scariest parents who tend to get their way as they threaten to make formal complaints etc etc.

I suspect quite a few are questionable labels to be honest but to be fair I guess the last two years have made everyone's mental health worse.... But where do we draw a line- what makes one person's experience deemed worse than others?

It's exhausting. And sad.

That sounds liker a complete shitshow and wouldn't be tolerated in my schools. The head has a lot to answer for it would appear.

As long as the needs of my children are being met, I think that overall understanding of difference/ mental health is a good thing. If my son is to be taken out for small group lessons or quiet movement breaks, I would expect that to continue. However, it can only be a good thing if others get the same without compromising the quality of sn provision. There are ECHPs for a reason, they are a legal document and the school has to adhere to the provisions they stipulate. There would be no jealousy as it is about getting my child's needs met, not about having them feel 'special'

Yep I see this at work too.
Colleagues who basically throw in the mental health card to get away with doing what they want.
The rest of us who might suffer just as much from mental health issues but prefer to keep it private and try other methods of dealing with it, are then left to do all the hard work.
The tell tale give away in all of this is that whenever it suits those who won't do the hard work, they swap and change.
So A refuses to work weekends as it is too stressful and affects their mental health. This means the rest of us have to do it even though we would rather not.
Yet whenever A's dh needs the car midweek A suddenly has to work weekends as they can't work midweek. Now person B decides they cannot possibly work weekends either so yet again the rest of us are told we have to cover for them. Except it also suits person B to work specific weekends and have time off mid week, surprisingly this is always when their oh is off mid week.
Whenever managers try and rectify this as A and B are contracted to work weekends and not pick and choose they go off sick, again causing the rest of us more stress.
Nobody else can state when they will work we are told you are contracted to work blah blah blah. Exactly the same as A and B are.

You're right, but it's so pervasive in state primary schools, well behaved girls are sat next to naughty boys all the time. It makes girls think they are responsible for moderating others' behaviour.

Does this still happen? It was the case at my state primary 30 years ago. Also a star chart on the wall, and according to that all the naughty kids were the best in the class as they'd get a star for basic things like sitting quietly doing their work 🤦🏻‍♀️

@glowingcandle

You're right, but it's so pervasive in state primary schools, well behaved girls are sat next to naughty boys all the time. It makes girls think they are responsible for moderating others' behaviour.

Does this still happen? It was the case at my state primary 30 years ago. Also a star chart on the wall, and according to that all the naughty kids were the best in the class as they'd get a star for basic things like sitting quietly doing their work 🤦🏻‍♀️

Yes it does. My 2 are also exceptionally bright/ talented but I'm made to feel unreasonable for asking for the school to support them. They just seem to want to even them all out.

Strange how the staff in these schools can't just rock up in whatever the hell they like though isn't it?
Perhaps Miss would benefit neatly from swimming before going to work but here's the thing: if she then rocked up to school in trainers, jogging bottoms, t-shirt and hair stinking if chlorine you can guarantee the parents of these children would be hitching like mad about her. Funny how staff can't wear what the hell they like even if it's far more comfortable.

Pre- pandemic, 47% of the school I worked in had some sort of additional provision for GCSE examinations. 47%. I'm sure it will be worse now examinations are back post-pandemic.

I'm a teacher and it is honestly a shambles. We cannot give every child at school a personalised education. It is impossible. Also, has no one remembered that humans are all different? We all have struggles and problems that affect us. It should only be very extreme cases that get the additional support.

"as they'd get a star for basic things like sitting quietly doing their work 🤦🏻‍♀️"

They are not basic things for some children. You could educate yourself with a little reading.

"It should only be very extreme cases that get the additional support."

You mean cutting all additional needs funding from mainstream schools.

as they'd get a star for basic things like sitting quietly doing their work.
If it is any consultation the parents of sticker DC are very aware of the stares from other parents.
Sometimes DS arrived out with 5 stickers, he has a SNA but as mentioned up-thread it worked, he loves learning and loves to please teachers and other DC.