thread for those interested in refugee hosting/sponsorship

[EezyOozy]

I thought I would start a new thread about this as I have just heard on BBC news that they are opening up a web form tomorrow to express interest. Apparently families/households can claim £350 a month (I assume for increased expenses) and refugees will be eligible to claim or benefits and work. We have large a spare room but live rurally so whilst I will express interest I'm not sure we will be taken up on it.

I thought I would start a new thread for those who are interested and to follow the progress of the registration procedure/how this pans out in practice.

Posted here because it's the only place I know gets plenty traffic, I will probably be asking for this to be moved but don't know where to.

My guests arrive on Tuesday and I'm so very excited to meet them. I had to rearrange my house inspection as I was just too overwhelmed with all the things that need doing and the woman hasn't gotten back to me yet but I'm hoping it is after they arrive so the person can see them happy and comfortable here.
I'm going to the airport to pick them up via train. I don't drive and I couldn't get a discounted ticket unfortunately but I'm being very careful with my personal budget so I can help them with the things we can't get donated for them. Taking them to a charity local children's centre the next day to help them feel welcome and have told the ladies working there. I've still got a cot to build and another single bed or a child's bed to find by Tuesday but I hoping I can do it. DD is going to my mum tomorrow as I have an evening Ukrainian lesson and I hope I can use that time to get everything sorted. A very kind friend of mine in Spain ordered some new pillows for them and I'm collecting a baby gate over the weekend from a local person.

Just found this thread - not yet read all - but will do. We are sponsoring two siblings (F22,M17) - we are in week SIX …. harassing our MP daily. HO said it would be escalated last week - have heard nothing. Guests have been in Poland throughout - had to leave their parents in Ukraine to care for elderly relatives

Oh bloody hell DFOD that’s awful. Ours took exactly a month which I thought was bad enough. Unbelievable that they still haven’t sorted the system out.

Welcome DFOD. I'm in a similar boat, although not as long as you - coming up 4 weeks. My MP gets told something different by the Home Office every time they ask. My family all have international passports so it should be so simple. They are also waiting in Poland.

@Tulipomania and @DFOD
I don't know if your guests needed to attend a VAC but if not, and they already have Ukrainian international passports, then try phoning your local Council and speaking to whoever there has access to the Foundry system. They will be able to look and see whether the visas are showing as issued/pending/confirmed/missing etc. That's all the council can tell you and it's not a live system so it can take a few days for updates to show at their end but if your MP is being given conflicting info or DFOD you're just not getting answers from anyone, then this can help.

If the visas are showing as issued/approved they will be allowed through if they go to Calais/Paris for the ferry/eurostar as UK border force staff can see the visas have been issued on the system. Sorry if none of the above is new/helpful information to you.

Welcome DFOD. Good luck getting things moving. It took a lot of hassling to get ours through.

Shelovespawpatrol - don’t worry too much about the house inspection. They seem to vary wildly. All ours were interested in was smoke alarms and carbon monoxide monitors.

Countess - that’s frustrating that the primary school is being slow moving. Our primary has been very helpful in getting little ones in, but applications for the local secondaries seem to be just disappearing into a void. I’ve got a meeting with the Head at dd’s school next week with a view to getting my guest a place in the sixth form in September. They’ve already sponsored one local refugee family, waiving fees and providing free bus and uniform so fingers crossed!

Thanks Shiloh. My guests all have international passports, and I had emailed the council on Monday but not got a response, so your email prompted me to phone and they have now come back to confirm the visas have all been issued.

We will continue to chase for the PTT letters - my guests are hoping to fly to London from Poland. Mum is travelling with a 4 yo and 10 yo so I suspect going by land to Paris would be a but much, but if that's the only option ...

What a frustrating system.

Yay, school called me back and we are going in to visit on Monday.
We now have nursery and preschool sorted. They have their letters from the doctor which I imagine will have NHS numbers on so we can easily book covid jabs and this also means they have post with their name and address on so we can get the kids signed up at the library. (I am sure both library and covid jabs were doable without but it gets a bit wearying having to go round the long way every time.)
We are settling down to a bit of a routine now. I found my 16yo playing with the 3 and 5 year old which was nice.

That’s lovely that your kids are interacting, Countess. Mine are still a bit shy around each other. My 16yo guest tends to hide in her room quite a lot, which I was a bit worried about but friends have assured me this is completely normal teenage behaviour!

Interestingly, I’d told them when they arrived that some local people had been collecting clothes for Ukrainians. My guest mum said no thank you, if they needed anything they would buy it or ask. But while she was at work the other day, an acquaintance whose daughter is a minor reality TV sleb and influencer/instagrammer turned up on my doorstep with a huge bag of clothes that her daughter didn’t want. Most of it brand new or worn once for a video. My teenage guest was thrilled. I told her that if she didn’t want it it was fine, I’d pass it along, but she delightedly accepted it. It was lovely to see the big smile on her face.

Discover yesterday that DS (22, living locally with friends) asked our Ukrainian 17 year old round to play computer games with him and his housemates the other day. Seems to have gone well - games are nice in that they don't need too much language in common. They're both off out this morning to a local Ukrainian meet up at a local church so hoping the mother in particular makes some friends as I think she needs some Ukrainian speakers.

That’s lovely Venus.

One of mine (15 with autistic traits) isn’t interacting- he hides in his room and hasn’t come to meals. I am not too worried because firstly it isn’t too different from his normal behaviour and secondly I think he will be ok in the end. He failed to avoid my guest in the corridor yesterday and hid behind dh but imo the fact he let that happen at all means he is letting his guard down. I don’t think it will happen through him saying ‘yes I will meet them now’ but through him gradually growing less careful about avoidance.

Fireyflies that’s so kind of your ds. I think you’re absolutely right about them needing other Ukrainian speakers. We hosted a morning coffee and cakes in the garden today - I just put an open invitation on the local hosts’ WhatsApp. Had about seven ladies and their kids turn up, and they were still there at 3 in the afternoon! My guests said it was SO nice to speak their own language and make new friends. They all swapped phone numbers at the end. My dc’s guinea pigs were a big ice breaker for the kids too. It was lovely.

Sounds lovely ,@VenusClapTrap . A neighbour of mine has organised a small garden party next weekend for local hosts and Ukrainians which I'm looking forward to. This evening we are watching Eurovision together which is going well.

Well done to all of you organising social activities for your guests.

We are one. step closer; the mum has got her PTT letter. Just waiting for the kids' letters now.

Foundry has confirmed all 3 visas issued.

It's great reading all of your updates about how well it's going with your guests and, in Tulip's case, getting closer to having PTTs for everyone. The social morning is a great idea. I love that your kids are starting to get along too.

Have any of you any advice on doing a little welcome package for your guests for when they get here or would you say best not to, and just see what they need/want when they get here, if anything? And any top tips on what not to do, now you've gone through the first days/weeks of having guests? I know the obvious ones like not asking about their loved ones and their experiences but waiting for them to raise it if they want to.

I left ours a small pack of chocolates each partly because they were arriving late at night and I was aware might be awake and up before us in the morning (cause of the time difference) I also left them a note with the WiFi code, which I think was appreciated. Other than that, just towels and the bathroom has toiletries. We cooked for them for the first few days but also gave them a kitchen cupboard and half a fridge and made it clear they could do their own cooking in future (or cook for us some of the time). The teenager is chilled and seems to be comfortable fitting into our household. The mum seems to want to pay her way, even though money is very tight. Mainly they've appreciated help with bureaucracy - phone calls to sort out appointments, filling in application forms etc is all much easier in your first language.
I've asked fairly open questions about family at times which doesn't seem to have caused any distress. She was happy to talk about what her DH did prior to the war. (He was a conveyancing solicitor, now he's a volunteer packing trucks for the army and reliant on her salary, hence the stretched finances). A small patch of a vegetable bed in the garden to plant some seeds in has also gone down well and chats about what vegetables her parents grow in their garden (with help of Say Hi translation app).

Shiloh - electric socket adaptors!

Our 5 year old guest starts school today! She’s so excited!

The 3 year old had his first day at preschool yesterday which went really well but school feels much more momentous.

Thanks Fireyflies and Countess, I've added these tips to my ever growing 'Ukrainian Guest Action List'!

Good luck to your little guest today Countess. I'm sure it will go well for them. My friend's guest 5 year old recently had his first day in school and she said he came back saying he had a great day.

Shiloh - I made up a basket of toiletries, both essentials and treat type stuff. Also cosy pyjamas and slippers which went down really well.

Hope school goes well, Countess!

I had a very good meeting this morning with the Headteacher, Chaplain and Welfare Officer at dd’s school. They are offering full sponsorship for my teenager and want her to start asap so that she can get a feel for the place, improve her English and decide if it’s the right place for her to study and do A-levels in September.

It may not be right for her; she may be happier at a vocational college, as I’m not sure she’s massively academic, so it’s great that they are offering her the chance to try it out before committing to the coming academic year. The school is a bit Hogwarts (her description!) and very different from her school back home, so if nothing else it will be an interesting experience for her. Class sizes are small, though, and there would be a lot of support in place, so I’m optimistic she could enjoy it there.

That’s so lovely of the school Venus!

Since starting this I have found that organisations divide into two groups, the ones that the moment they hear ‘Ukrainian refugee’ immediately want to help and will absolutely go the extra mile, and those that are uninterested and are not going to do you any favours even if it’s just the matter of taking a bit of extra time to answer questions. And actually whether they have shared a ‘we stand with Ukraine’ meme on their Facebook page at some point turns out to be a pretty good guide.

The final 2 PTTs came through today & the Mum is now looking into booking flights from Poland. Thanks to our MP I think as I hassled him again this morning. I think they will come in a few days.

I've already done an Ocado order. I included Percy Pigs & some mini-Magnums as treat foods for the kids. I've also bought toothbrushes, toothpaste & dental floss for them all & deodorant & Tampax for the mum. Do you think that is going too far? I don't know what they will be bringing with them, they have been staying with a family in Poland, not in a camp or anything.

I've managed to find some of my kids old Lego as well. Going to buy a new football (they are 2 boys).

Posted on a local Facebook page asking for school uniform.

What else do I need to think about?

Sounds lovely, Tulip.
I'd add slippers - our guest said it's very common to change out of street clothes and into pyjamas or similar on returning home and she always wears slippers.
Consider adding sanitary towels as well? Tampax in my experience not as widely used on other countries (not sure about Ukraine).

Rather than buying them tampons or sanitary towels, I think I'd just leave an open packet visible in the bathroom. That way they can punch one if needed urgently. Ours so seem to want some independence and autonomy. I think they'd rather buy that sort of thing themselves

Thanks both. They will have an ensuite (plus I stopped needing sanpro about a decade ago so it would look a bit odd).