Only having tap water at a restaurant, rude?

[Chocolattay]

Me and DH have a young baby and are a bit skint.

I go out occasionally with my friends and will skimp them, only have a main and juice etc. Today we finally got round to a date night, baby present.

I am BFing and he was driving. I only wanted water (since baby fizzy drinks give me awful burps and didn’t fancy juice). DH doesn’t like soft drinks and was driving.

We just had a jug of tap water. The staff did keep asking “Are you sure you don’t want a drink?” and we felt a bit pressured so in the end ordered coffees (which we didn’t really want) with our dessert.

Genuine question as I’m curious as to people’s thoughts, is it shitty to just get tap water at a local family owned restaurant?

I dont drink alcohol and can't drink juice or fizz (IBD). If DH and I go out for a meal and he's drinking then I see no issue in ordering tap water. If it's a night out out then I usually order mineral water as I feel a bit tight/miserable on tap water all night.

You think it's ok to take up a table and spend nothing?
I don't.

Where did I say that? We’re having a full meal!

I don’t like fizzy drinks, and not a huge juice fan and bottled water tastes awful, tap water for me always unless I’m having alcohol then I have both. Used to work in the hospitality and never thought anything of it

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll great tip on the soda water.
I don't know why I hadn't thought of it as my go to - if not drinking- is either a sparkling water, or a soda and lime. But like you I'd prefer they charged the cost of a draft coke or similar as wouldn't feel right to not pay for it.

@daisypond

I only ever have tap water when eating out. I don’t drink alcohol and I would never want coffee or tea with a meal. I don’t drink fizzy drinks like coke. Completely normal to me.

Me too.

Used to work in catering. Not weird at all. I wouldn't even have remembered someone ordering "just" water with a meal. For some people, that's their preference when eating! You're fine.

If staff are weird about it, they're the unusual ones.

Are you sure they weren't just trying to make sure you were well cared for?

Given that you could choose to drink nothing at all in a restaurant I’m pretty sure you’re allowed to only have tap water, assuming the restaurant offer it.

I'm picky with drinks. I will drink with a pub meal out if they have local cider, or I will have coffee, or orange or grapefruit juice with breakfast, but that's about it. Otherwise tap water.

Tap water at a place you are ordering food from= fine.

Tap water from a coffee shop= not fine.

@waitingandhoping243

Tap water at a place you are ordering food from= fine.

Tap water from a coffee shop= not fine.

What about if you ordered a cake at a coffee shop, would tap water be fine then?

I only really drink water. I'll occasionally order a j20 but for the most part I always just get water. Occasional squash, juice or smoothie at home but I don't often fancy it. Nobody has ever been weird about it. Never bothered with bottled water, seems silly!
Never occurred to me anyone would be weird about it . You're buying a meal, drink what you want!

I think it's fine, OP. I had Sunday lunch out recently, six of us, we drank tap water. We ordered two courses each though, it's not like we didn't spend anything! Waiting staff didn't seem bothered.

I don't drink much alcohol, and never drink fruit juice.

FYI just because you can Drink while bf doesn’t mean you should I would never have dreamed of drinking whilst bf. It’s not a necessity and it’s really no hardship to not consume alcohol for 6/12 months or whatever. Of course you’re passing it on in your breast milk.

No different to not ordering a dessert if you don't want one.

If you was just sat there with a jug of water, then I can see the staffs point

But you wasn’t. You had a 3 course meal. So yanbu

Personally, l enjoy a glass or 2 of wine with a meal. But if you are buying a meal, you should not have to justify not buying a drink. Some people can’t tolerate fizzy drinks, a lot of others have diabetes and have to watch the sugar. Others simply can’t afford the meal and the drink.

Whatever the reason, you should not have to explain yourself to restaurant staff. I think it’s quite alright to lie on this occasion. Look them in the eye and say “I can only drink water for medical reasons at the moment”.

Whatever the reason, you should not have to explain yourself to restaurant staff. I think it’s quite alright to lie on this occasion. Look them in the eye and say “I can only drink water for medical reasons at the moment”.

The first sentence is enough - you don’t need to explain yourself to staff. No need to lie, or make any excuses for something that is normal behaviour.

Whatever the reason, you should not have to explain yourself to restaurant staff. I think it’s quite alright to lie on this occasion. Look them in the eye and say “I can only drink water for medical reasons at the moment”.

Lie

Why the hell would anyone have to lie about drinking water

I only drink water, ever but I'm struggling to work out why you think this is something people need to lie about. Medical reasons? No it's choice. Simply my choice. I choose water. It's what I drink all day, every day and I am fucked if I am going to lie to some random restaurant to validate my choice

What about if you ordered a cake at a coffee shop, would tap water be fine then?

I hope so, I have done this for at least 30 years!

Supermarkets have loss-leaders, in the obvious hope that you'll go in initially for the cheap basics and then go on to fill up your trolley with lucrative luxuries - but although they can hope that, they've nobody to blame but themselves if people go in and buy a trolley-load of the cheap stuff that makes them no/very little/negative profit and nothing else.

Exactly. Supermarkets make very little on milk, for example, but no way am I going to buy a box of luxury chocolates every time I want a pint of semi-skimmed because ‘that’s where they make their money’.

I can’t imagine giving a toss what a waiter thinks of my order. I want him to bring it to my table, not critique it.

It’s bad customer service to keep pushing something on customers when they obviously don’t want it.

I might have started off feeling a little guilty for not ordering a paid for drink as we all know that restaurants make a lot of their money that way, but I’d make up for it in tips at the end if the service was good. The restaurant would miss out in both ways if they couldn’t just respect their customers choices.

I might have started off feeling a little guilty for not ordering a paid for drink as we all know that restaurants make a lot of their money that way, but I’d make up for it in tips at the end if the service was good.

But why would you feel guilty? They’re a business, not a charity. Alcohol use is surely declining. My 20-something DCs don’t drink.

I might have started off feeling a little guilty for not ordering a paid for drink as we all know that restaurants make a lot of their money that way, but I’d make up for it in tips at the end if the service was good.

The products from drinks and the tip jar don't generally go to the same place though, so if that's your justification then it's way off.

Profit from drinks