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Original poster

Only having tap water at a restaurant, rude?

199 replies

Chocolattay · 11/03/2022 22:04

Me and DH have a young baby and are a bit skint.

I go out occasionally with my friends and will skimp them, only have a main and juice etc. Today we finally got round to a date night, baby present.

I am BFing and he was driving. I only wanted water (since baby fizzy drinks give me awful burps and didn’t fancy juice). DH doesn’t like soft drinks and was driving.

We just had a jug of tap water. The staff did keep asking “Are you sure you don’t want a drink?” and we felt a bit pressured so in the end ordered coffees (which we didn’t really want) with our dessert.

Genuine question as I’m curious as to people’s thoughts, is it shitty to just get tap water at a local family owned restaurant?

OP posts:
Backtomyoldname · 11/03/2022 23:55

Normal for us.

99% of the time I’m driving and so 1 small beer and then tap water. DW rarely drinks and so tapwater from the start.

Dreamstate · 11/03/2022 23:57

@ispycobrakai

How are they taking up a table and not spending if they are eating food. Honestly what claptrap is this

SquirrelG · 12/03/2022 00:08

Not at all - perfectly common here (NZ). Restaurants generally provide diners with a bottle/jug of water at the table (no charge) as a matter of course, and often keep refilling it.

ISpyCobraKai · 12/03/2022 00:16

[quote Dreamstate]@ispycobrakai

How are they taking up a table and not spending if they are eating food. Honestly what claptrap is this[/quote]
I said going to a pub or bar and only having tap water.

janj2301 · 12/03/2022 00:18

Restaurants are allowed to make a charge for tap water, to cover their cost ie water rates, staff cost, washing glasses. Most of course don't charge

Dreamstate · 12/03/2022 00:23

@janj2301

Restaurants are allowed to make a charge for tap water, to cover their cost ie water rates, staff cost, washing glasses. Most of course don't charge
Only if they are not licensed to sell alcohol. Otherwise by law they to provide free tap water
Dreamstate · 12/03/2022 00:26

@ispycobrakai

And as per uk law all licensed premises have to provide de free tap water. So if I walk into a bar and ask for it they cannot refuse it. When I meet friends in pubs I only drink tap water again I don't drink alcohol, soda or juice and bottles water is disgusting in taste

Joystir59 · 12/03/2022 00:27

I quite often just order tap water with my food. I think the staff were rude to keep asking if you wanted a drink

TheTeenageYears · 12/03/2022 00:34

It really shouldn't be an issue. Almost all the alternatives to water are bad for you anyway so why should you feel forced into buying alcohol/juice/fizzy drinks.

Saracen · 12/03/2022 00:43

I do have tap water much of the time with my meal. It does feel a bit mean.

On the other hand, for health reasons I would rather drink water than anything else. And for environmental reasons I find it hard to reconcile myself to drinking bottled water. I went to a Lebanese restaurant in London a few months ago and accidentally ended up drinking bottled water IMPORTED FROM LEBANON. How crazy is that?!

DrWhoNowww · 12/03/2022 00:50

If you’re eating then it’s totally ok and quite normal - they have made money from the food you have ordered.

If you were just sitting there drinking tap water without ordering food, then yes, I’d expect some raised eyebrows as you’re taking up a table that they could actually make some profit on.

But then I don’t believe anyone would really be so lacking in awareness that they would genuinely take up a table in a restaurant/pub just to drink tap water as a group.

if a couple of people do that when out with a larger group drinking alcohol then again fine…I’ve known quite a few bars offer free soft drinks for designated drivers so it’s the same thing.

MrsClatterbuck · 12/03/2022 00:56

We generally have tap water. Never seen an eyebrow raised once. We occasionally have sparkling water with lime cordial but it does bump up the bill a bit. Lots of places automatically give you a jug of water.
Though we do usually have a coffee or tea. Tbh we mostly have breakfast or lunch out.

Don't worry about what other people think. If you want tap water then just order it after all you are paying for 2 meals and dessert.

ISpyCobraKai · 12/03/2022 01:43

[quote Dreamstate]@ispycobrakai

And as per uk law all licensed premises have to provide de free tap water. So if I walk into a bar and ask for it they cannot refuse it. When I meet friends in pubs I only drink tap water again I don't drink alcohol, soda or juice and bottles water is disgusting in taste[/quote]
With friends yes, alone, as I meant, no.

caringcarer · 12/03/2022 01:51

At my favourite family run Italian restaurant they put s bottle of chilled tap water on every table and will bring you ice too. I never feel pressured to buy alcohol or a soft drink. We eat 3 courses and have been going there for 17 years since our first date.

ISpyCobraKai · 12/03/2022 03:08

Don't suppose it's anywhere near Glasgow?

Kinsters · 12/03/2022 03:19

I never feel bad about ordering tap water if that's all I want. Bottled water just seems very wasteful with the packaging plus the miles on moving the water itself.

avamiah · 12/03/2022 03:23

Yes it’s ok to ask for tap water as long as you are ordering food.

Whenever I go to a Indian restaurant I always order a bottle of sparkling water and when I go to a Chinese restaurant I order Chinese tea and sparkling water.

I just wouldn’t order a jug of tap water as I can have that at home but that’s just me.

Coyoacan · 12/03/2022 03:38

I always drink water and sometimes a coffee too, but I cannot understand the angst, surely a customer goes to a restaurant to eat and drink what they want, not to drink alcohol or a soft drink to please the waiting staff?

ukborn · 12/03/2022 05:12

I always ask for tap water, and find these days it comes in those bottles with those kilner jar type stoppers at the top - so they gave them already prepared and chilled. If dinner I may get another drink too but my teenage daughter just has water. No one has ever raised an eyebrow - at least not obviously. I'm talking anywhere from local café to more upmarket central London restaurants.

theyoungishman · 12/03/2022 05:31

I don't think I've even been to a restaurant or cafe where a jug or bottle of tap water hasn't been brought to my table automatically, without bring requested. I'm in Australia though so might be different to the UK.

Certainly never any pressure to buy other drinks if you are ordering substantial food. I don't drink alcohol but will after have a coffee after a meal.

SquirrelG · 12/03/2022 05:49

@theyoungishman - yes, it's the same in NZ, water is always provided at the table, you don't have to ask for it.

mycatisannoying · 12/03/2022 05:54

Totally fine, OP. Eating out is so expensive.

RobotValkyrie · 12/03/2022 07:15

What's rude is trying to pressure paying customers to buy extras they don't actually want. Very poor manners indeed... from the staff.

Mind you, I'm sure the pressure comes from management. But hard sale techniques are still rude.

londonrach · 12/03/2022 07:18

We do too. I don't drink hot drinks and only so much fizzy you can have. Never had raised eyebrows. We buying food. Yanbu.

speakout · 12/03/2022 07:28

I didn't realise ordering tap water was so controversial.

I always ask for a jug of water with meals. Often in addition to a soft drink, especially if it is spicy food. No waiters seem aghast.
I wonder if it is geographical.
I know tap water is variable in quality, especially in some big cities, and tap water is perhaps not always a drink of choice.
I live in rural scotland, and know local tap water comes from nearby mountain reservoirs - soft clean water. We are very confident in our tap water.
Not sure I would be so happy drinking from a muddy chalky river, full of oestrogens from from contraceptive pill contamination.

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