Only having tap water at a restaurant, rude?

[Chocolattay]

Me and DH have a young baby and are a bit skint.

I go out occasionally with my friends and will skimp them, only have a main and juice etc. Today we finally got round to a date night, baby present.

I am BFing and he was driving. I only wanted water (since baby fizzy drinks give me awful burps and didn’t fancy juice). DH doesn’t like soft drinks and was driving.

We just had a jug of tap water. The staff did keep asking “Are you sure you don’t want a drink?” and we felt a bit pressured so in the end ordered coffees (which we didn’t really want) with our dessert.

Genuine question as I’m curious as to people’s thoughts, is it shitty to just get tap water at a local family owned restaurant?

Yeah drinking just tap water became mainstream and completely not controversial like two decades ago. Some people here are ancient as fuck.

I only drink tap water. I have felt that a few are a bit funny about it... but I don't want anything else so just say no and ignore the Eyebrows.

My ex used to run a pub and it used to piss him off of people came in and asked for tap water and nothing else. He said if people started doing it more, he’d start charging for the glass and the service.

Rather different to go to a pub just for a glass of water, than to ask for it along with a meal you are paying for.

Restaurants will pressure you to drink. They make the most money by selling booze than the food (unless you’re in a Michelin star restaurant), so I think you find most restaurants push the alcohol. I always have water because I tend to drive when out.

My husband and I haven’t had an alcoholic drink with a meal in a couple of decades. We eat out maybe twice a month. We have never been pressured in to buying alcohol. “Do you want the wine list” is as far as it goes.

I thought it was pretty widely understood that restaurants make much of their margin on drinks (both soft and alcoholic). By all means have tap water (I often do) but don’t be surprised if they encourage you to order something else.

I've often felt quite pressured at the table to order a drink that costs something. Depending on the mood, I'll either order a bottle of water, or go into detail as to why I'm not ordering a drink...

I wouldn't say you're U. The food is what makes up bulk of the bill, but having had the same sort of treatment from wait staff I understand how you feel.

Oh or another reply I've said a few times now "I'd rather the extra few quid goes into a tip for you, than down the drain when I don't drink x/y/z"

We always ask for a jug of tap water in a restaurant. Often we only want a glass of wine each. Has never been a problem in London at very expensive restaurants. I can see no reason why anyone would be embarrassed about asking for corporation pop.

Was at Tom Kerridge pub first time last week. First thing they did was bring large jug of tap water and kept filling it up

I had a glass (ok maybe 2) of wine. My friend stuck to water. They asked her once did she want anything else, she said no, they didn’t ask again

Tap water with meal is perfectly fine in my opinion what ever you order. The staff were rude

I think it's deplorable if you were made to feel under pressure. The restaurant has no way of knowing personal reasons for sticking to water; for example, people in recovery from an alcohol problem are entitled to a pleasant dining experience too.

It is extremely cheeky to order only tap water and no other drinks.

@Viviennemary

It is extremely cheeky to order only tap water and no other drinks.

Why? I can’t even get my head around why anyone would think that.

I usually always get tap water. Drinks are over priced or have too much sugar/calories in them.

I order tap water with ice and lemon. If out in a group I'll order a jug with ice and lemon it always gets emptied and refilled sometimes women friends particularly enjoy it. It's a way of pacing yourself,

It’s fine, nobody should feel pressure to drink. I wouldn’t mind a cover charge of a couple of pounds for a jug of tap water either if it’s an issue.

Of course it’s fine to drink tap water!! You’ve paid for the meal.

As a former restaurant/pub manager (thank you covid) it wouldnt bother me in the slightest. But then my places where high volume, fast turnover so most of our money did come from booze, so one table on water wouldnt be an issue. I can understand that a small family run place could rely on their booze mark up which is a lot higher than food (which is barely more than breaking even in most places), but that doesnt mean that they should pressure you into order alcohol. Maybe the staff are on some sort of bonus for upselling booze which would explain (but not excuse) it.

@Viviennemary what is it cheeky? If you’re ordering food I don’t see the problem. If you’re taking up a table just for tap water, then yes that’s cheeky because you’re denying the establishment any revenue for that table.

Tap water is free, however, there is of course an associated cost to the resturant. Water is not free from the Tap they have to pay water rates, the jug glasses also need purchasing, the ice and lemon which goes into it and the cost of washing the glasses and jugs and the cost of employing the waiter/waitress to serve it, prepare it clean it. YANBU to order tap water but I'd take the above into consideration and perhaps order a non alcoholic drink also or tip reasonably. It is a business and they need to make money, if they don't it would close. You can factor this into your costs of the food but those not ordering water would also have to pay for a service they don't use. But having said that YANBU you ordered coffee too.

It seems fine to me. I almost always just have tap water in restaurants, although DP often has a glass of wine/ beer, but I certainly don't feel a obligation to buy alcoholic or fizzy drinks with a meal.

I think that raised eyebrows at tap water is quite an old fashioned.

I have only ever ordered tap water in a restaurant. I don't drink any liquid with my meal, so it might as well be something free not being drunk, than some over priced bottled water. On the very rare occasion I'm not driving (partner doesn't drive) I have a glass of wine or three.

We always drink tap water, unless we are having alcohol. You ordered a meal so there’s nothing wrong with it. I can’t imagine the ‘raised eyebrows’ thing is real.

Not weird at all if you’re eating there.

Very weird if you’ve gone out to drink Tao water

This is SO odd. Maybe because it's relatively hot here, but after 20 years in Sydney, I'm baffled that eyebrows would be raised.

Usually, when we go out to eat, they start by asking if you want water for the table. Most places will say "sparkling or tap?". We always have tap and no one bats an eyelid. Or raises an eyebrow!

DH will usually have a beer or glass of wine, but I nearly always have water at the moment.

Honestly, if you're eating they can keep their eyebrows to themselves.

It is extremely cheeky to order only tap water and no other drinks

Don't be so ridiculous. If water is your drink of choice, why would you order and pay for something you don't want?

I was in a restaurant in Edinburgh the other week with water already on all the tables.
Much appreciated, I didn't order an extra drink either, they were perfectly decent to me and I enjoyed my food so much that I went back the next day and did the same.
Ot turns out a friend of mine and her husband used to go when they were students they are now in their 50's and it's still going strong so it clearly hasn't harmed their business.