To not push my child in to sport

[Backtothefutureagain]

Ds is just about to turn 6
He goes to a swimming class once a week
We tried him with football when he was 4-5yo and he enjoyed it for a month or so as he was with his friends but suddenly he didn’t want to go any more and he is still adamant he doesn’t like football, no interest when it’s on tv or if dh says let’s go and play football etc
Ds has become really in to his gaming, wanting to play on the switch a lot (was Dh’s console) which we allow with time constraints
My dh is concerned hes going to be a “gamer” rather than out playing sports with his friends. He’s always trying to suggest different sports clubs to ds and feels like we’ve somehow failed him!! I keep trying to reiterate to dh that ds is only 5 and there’s plenty of time for him to find sports he enjoys but if he isn’t in to sport I’m not really that bothered. AIBU in my opinion?
We try to keep him otherwise active, go out to the park etc when we can and he’s forever running around.

As long as your child is active, it’s fine.

I’ve been a gamer since I was a kid but I was also in school clubs (art club, sewing club, chess club, service club, chorus) ,Girl Scouts, and doing dance lessons. When I wasn’t doing those I was riding my bike around the neighbourhood and school was about a two mile round trip walk (1/4 of it hills). Once it was dark, and homework was done, I was playing games or reading a book.

My dad wanted me to be in sports but the competitiveness of sports put me off of them and being shouted at when I made a mistake.

As an adult, I go on hike, garden, do diy, read, watch documentaries and walk everywhere, and go to the gym on top of gaming.

Gaming doesn’t automatically mean slacker and gaming can be a possible field of work later down the road if he is still interested.

I would reduce the gaming tbh, he's too young to be "into" that kind of thing

If he's generally active then it's fine. Would your DH be saying the same if you had a girl I wonder? Why is it always boys that are expected to be "sporty"?

My DS7 does swimming and beavers, he did a sports club after school til it got cancelled recently. I've suggested other clubs to him including football, he's not interested, says he just wants to come home after school. Fair enough imo

Too young to be into gaming but not too young to be into swimming / football / horse riding etc?

@cadburyegg

I would reduce the gaming tbh, he's too young to be "into" that kind of thing

If he's generally active then it's fine. Would your DH be saying the same if you had a girl I wonder? Why is it always boys that are expected to be "sporty"?

My DS7 does swimming and beavers, he did a sports club after school til it got cancelled recently. I've suggested other clubs to him including football, he's not interested, says he just wants to come home after school. Fair enough imo

I haven’t actually stated how much gaming he has so reducing it to what?

I agree with the boys must be in to sports thing. I’ve said from day 1 I’d be happy with him playing an instrument, reading books and doing drama club, I couldn’t care less if he wasn’t in to sport. Dh has other views obviously.

I haven’t actually stated how much gaming he has so reducing it to what?

Well no but you said he is really into it and asks a lot..? Presumably if you were talking about once a month or so it wouldn’t be worth mentioning?

I was assuming he’s playing multiple times a week. Maybe I’m wrong.

I get both sides of it.

My DB and I weren’t into sports at all. Our DM used to really try to encourage us, but we just weren’t keen. Our DF wasn’t into sports at all, so it was a losing battle for her.

Now, with our kids - DH is really into it. We have basically let them try anything and everything, and then stick with the ones they enjoy. Tennis, football, rugby, floorball, hockey, ballet, jazz dancing, gym, mountain biking, swimming, diving, netball, horse-riding, and I’m sure I’ve forgotten a few over the years. DH’s mantra was - at least one team sport and one individual.

Tennis, hockey, netball and horse-riding have stuck.

My DC are both a lot more confident and outgoing than me, and I know that a lot of that is down to being actively engaged in sport, making friends through teams, being good at some sports, etc. Like it or not, being good at sports does have social caché.

I look back now, and realise why my Mum (who obviously loved her sports growing up) was so keen for us to do it. It is good for kids.

But it’s about finding the right one for them, that they genuinely enjoy, and want to do.

My DC also do music and other cultural things - it’s not all about sports - that’s not healthy when they’re young, either.

I absolutely think there is a place for gaming, but it's about balance. So long as your child has time reading books, playing with toys, outside, socialising, exercising (could be climbing trees or chasing butterflies or whatever, doesn't have to be formal) then I absolutely believe there is space for gaming.
My kids absolutely love to go out to the arcade as an occasional treat, we all have a go on the driving games and shooting games. I don't see the problem with screen time in 5y olds so long As they have some balance. Being a gamer is not intrinsically bad either. So long as it is gaming for pleasure and not a gaming addiction. Offering alternatives and making sure there are time limits, helps to keep it in balance as one interest and not their only interest. It can actually be a really good way to escape your stresses and unwind, yes gamers get a bad rep, but I would rather my children be into gaming than drugs or alcohol or joy riding. It's not evil. I am happier now that my gaming tween is also showing more varied interests ofc, but I can also see that gaming was a brilliant coping strategy when the world was shut down. It got her through a lot of scary, lonely, difficult times and she learned some admirable digital skills. If she ends up with a career in engineering or coding or whatever it will be the seed that was planted playing mine craft in lockdown

I have no interest in organised sport. Never have. At school the only sport I was any good at was shooting, and you can do that lying down.

I have no interest in gaming either. It has never held me back.

Forcing him to do sport would be cruel. Some kids just are not sporty. I was forced to do sport as a child on the basis it was good for me. Most miserable times of my childhood

Sorry but I would insist on a couple of sports in addition to liking gaming .

I don't think it's a healthy hobby

Physical activity is vital for young children. If they don't learn core skills they find it harder and harder as they get older. Then they are rubbish at sport compared to peers. So yes it's a good idea. Any sport,