To be irritated at flirtatious women

[jemjens]

It really is starting to get under my skin how many women flirt with DH when we're out walking the dog. Women will make eye contact with him rather than with me, ignoring me, when I speak they go back to him.

The other day we encountered a couple and DH said something funny and the woman was straight away all giggly and managed to somehow manoeuvre me out of the way so that I had to walk behind her while she walked adjacent to DH. It was like I was invisible to her.

DH is gregarious, that's one of his traits. But it's like these women are being starved of male attention in their lives and so immediately latch on to him the minute he engages conversation. Sometimes I feel like saying to them hello, I am here you know.

In the past (before we got the dog) he's told me about random conversations he's had with women in queues, in waiting rooms, etc., and that he said he thinks how bizarre the things they tell him that they must think of him as a sort of agony aunt. Now I'm actually seeing for myself IRL what he means, it's kind of grating on me.

Are you very petite and slender as well as looking a lot younger than you are? I think, as pp have already said, these rampant women dogwalkers think your gorgeous hubby is your father, and that's why they zoom in and start flirting with him.

It's cheaper than paid dating sites and single people are often advised to get a dog as a way of meeting men/women.

Either that or you have an absolutely gorgeous pooch and you have completely misread the situation.

@DorothyZbornakIsAQueen

We are both attractive and both look much younger than we really are

Have a prize for the sexiest dog walkers ever

Watch out. Channel 4 may pinch that one! We all saw it was your idea first Dorothy.

**I've seen him 'flirt' on the odd occasion over the years where I know he's been sexually attracted to someone, and it's completely different behaviour.

What? Care to elaborate on that?

I feel your pain OP, now I'm fairly attractive,look good for my age but DH is pretty handsome , and getting better with age
Woman love him. They always have. It seems they always will.
But he's married to me,so... by all means get your jollies flirting, cos it's going nowhere.
I don't really think about it anymore , ans if someone's very brazen infront of me: I make sure to do a ridiculous giggle back at them. That usually shuts them down.

This thread makes me think of the time I was shopping with my partner and our 3 month old who wouldn't go in the pram, so had to be held. After passing him to my partner while I nipped into the Cadburys shop, I came out to find him surrounded by cooing women!

My H has to speak with a lot of female creatives as part of our business— he is extremely good at pleasant ‘banter’ with them, not flirty but I guess some women might get those vibes— it doesn’t bother me— what does bother me is a lot of the time he’s brusque , argumentative and certainly not ‘banterish’ with me. I suspect OP it’s just your H has an open friendly manner and plenty of women like me are dealing with less than ‘easygoing’ at home and latch onto this.

@Hippolyte

Do you think you might be a bit paranoid. Surely not every dog walking woman is after your husband, albeit that I'm sure he's lovely!

How come so many people dismiss OPs and similar concerns like this? You know damn well that if it was a bloke plumber sidelining her to speak to DH that we'd all be calling sexism and saying it was deliberate - it's the same kind of behaviour and just as obvious.

I was out with a friend and her very good looking husband at the pub, and he's a lovely guy. He kept having to move away from certain groups of women because they were ogling him and making sexual comments right in front of my friend. My husband has worked in the entertainment industry a few years agi and I was the tagging along spouse, and I was regularly being elbowed aside so audience members could speak to him.

Some women are just that crass with an overblown ego, that sees something shiny and will do anything to get it.

But is your husband really such a raving hunk that women can't resist him even when he's out walking the dog?

I mean, he could be. But I doubt it.

Starved of male attention? Really? That's funny.

I can't move for sexy dog walkers where I live. Honestly, it's amazing I manage to do a full route without swooning at the feet of all the alarmingly attractive couples I pass.

I’m one of those who flirt with people’s dogs - I have no shame 😂

How come so many people dismiss OPs and similar concerns like this? You know damn well that if it was a bloke plumber sidelining her to speak to DH that we'd all be calling sexism and saying it was deliberate - it's the same kind of behaviour and just as obvious.

I think if this was a man saying he dislikes having his wife chat (or 'flirt') with men when they were out walking the dog, this would be considered controlling behaviour and his wife would be urged to consider if she should put up with his jealousy.

The only person making yourself invisible is you!

Some women's way of communicating with any man is flirting. It doesn't mean they actually fancy him. Most would probably run a mile if he was to try to take it any further. They may think they are just being pleasant and sociable, especially if they were a "daddy's girl"Of course your DH is lapping up the attention, especially if you're with him. It boosts his confidence and let's you see (in his mind anyway)what a catch he is. Anyway OP , its your own fault, you shouldn't have got such a cute dog

Hehe, this used to happen with my ex a lot. He's very handsome whereas when I'm my normal self, I can look quite casual/natural. Twice in comedy gigs were we called out in the sense how did i pull him?! It's quite funny but he was also very devoted to me. I wouldn't worry, if he cares for you, he will not notice these things.

Is this why, when I'm happily walking on my own and approach a couple the woman grabs her husband's arm/hand and ignores my cheerful greeting.

My fellow women, we have a long way to go.

Why isn’t your husband turning around and including you? Surely he should be introducing you or making it so you’re walking together. He’s ignoring you jus as much as the women are, that would infuriate me far more than a random woman to be honest.

I really feel for you OP - especially as MN is rough with this - if you mention this happens- it's just taken as you showing off/ being delusional about how attractive your DH is

Thing is , it does happen- my Dad is one of these men- he is incredibly good looking and gets loads of attention - and I had a previous partner and his dad like this too. It does feel horrible.

seems to me OP that people are being normally friendly but the UK is such a weird place right now that everyone must always be grumpy and never ever speak to anyone that a bit of social interaction seems like flirting?

I talk to all sorts of people when i'm out and about. Nobody thinks i'm flirting with them. (I'm slighlty above averagely attractive when I'm not in my joggers/hoodie, if that helps?)

Yes, this does happen OP. We were walking the dog in forest the other weekend and happened to meet a woman with a dog. We said hello - because I think it's nice to be friendly if you meet someone in a lonely forest, but her reaction to DP versus to me was very different. Even in the couple of minutes we chatted I noticed it. Actually made me and DP laugh afterwards.

I can't picture you giving off the most welcoming and approachable of vibes with the attitude you have tbf, so maybe that plays a part? Despite you being as equally stunning as your DH

I find dog walking to be quite social and will often end up chatting to other random walkers, male or female and in couples/groups or alone, as will OH. And if they say something funny, I'll laugh. Doesn't mean either of us are interested in them, or them in us

My ex used to do this. Very gregarious and talkative and gave out very flirty signals, although denied it. He would think nothing of taking me to a party of his friends/colleagues/family where I didn't know anyone and then talking to groups of women - you could hear gales of laughter. I learned not to care. He didn't like it when I did the same to him though.

I get what you mean - he may not mean it and it isn't the women's fault, but it does make you feel like a fool.

😂 aww it’s fine, my DH is attractive, fun, he often gets women chatting to him it doesn’t worry me in the least. Sadly, we don’t have a dog, otherwise I would consider nominating him for the sexiest dog walker competition 🏆

I think maybe your DH needs to stop chatting to random women 🤷‍♀️

I'm guessing it's all in your mind. At most, they may be talking to him because he looks friendly, whereas you are standing there with a sour face and they are wondering what's wrong with you.